I haven't had a single girl express even a shred of interest towards me

I've never had a girl express even a shred of interest towards me. I'm a kiss-less virgin and I can't even remember the last time I've been hugged by a non family member. The number of times I've been called ugly is well into the triple digits. But I'm not only ugly I'm also a 5'8-9 manlet.

These supposed best years of my life were spent in depression, suicidal tendencies, and loneliness but I suppose the rest of my miserable life will be even more miserable. I've been called a loser more times than I can count. I've literally been called a loser more times than I've been called by my first name. I used to feel sorry for girls who felt they were ugly(or are) ugly but I realize now that most of those girls would overlook me and treat me with as much contempt as anyone else. The reason most of those girls feel bad about being ugly is they don't want to spend the rest of their life with an ugly man like myself.

When I first went to college, I thought I would finally be able to meet people and make friends but this was not the case. I'm now nearly on the verge of dropping out of college. My marks are in the gutter. I have no friends. what a life...

I have no real motivation to improve my station in life. None whatsoever. I realize that no matter how much money I make or whatever I manage accomplish, it won't create any visceral feelings of love in a woman or respect in the general population. Any money I earn beyond the amount needed for the practical necessities is completely useless to me. If I do somehow manage to become rich, I would use that money to become a complete 100% shut in. That would be my favour to the rest of society. I guess most people would be pretty satisfied to never have to see my ugly face again. Until that happens, the only real reason to leave the house is for work, gym, and groceries. And I'm not particularly sold on the gym part.

I don't think I have any real options right now. My success and failure in life was written on my genetic coding and everything since then has been a chain reaction of events that I could not avoid.

 

It's all about your self-esteem. If a girl tells that you are self confident then she'll pay attention to you.

 

If you keep giving out these negative vibes you're just going to keep getting negative responses. Try improving your self esteem like tcore said. I've seen some pretty ugly dudes with hot girlfriends, mainly because they're out going, funny, and more or less act like douches. That seems to work, sometimes, towards certain girls.

Be more expresses and outgoing if you have a good personality. And you wont ever meet girls in college by just sitting in class, you have to get involved with your school and meet girls that way. But i do realise it's all easier said than done, so good luck!

 

Will you state of mind is working against you.

Success in life and thus happiness should not be linked to romantic successes or failures. It WILL feed into your depression creating a negative cycle.

And I agree the people who bully you and call you ugly to spite you are being cruel.

Perhaps you need to be someone's wingman.


Also you are taller than me.


Oh also in relation to our other discussion one of my ex's is with a guy who doesn't have a classically attractive face or a face as attractive as mine, but my ex is a 9 in looks and a 10 in personality.

We just didn't work out.

 

But I do have 1 question for you. Are you just looking to hook up with girls, or are you looking for a genuine serious relationship. girls in different place and use different mes to conve what you lookin what you looking for. these last couple of months.

 

Plastic surgeons can fix outside ugly.
Not a course of action I recommend, but it is an option.
I mean if you've sorta given up anyways, then why not look into it.

 

I just can't imagine someone so ugly that they couldn't find a mate. I know horribly obese people, midgets, deformed people, stinky, greasy-haired/zit-faced, mentally challenged, absolute selfish bums, totally horrid assholes that have and/or have had partners.

I mean, think about it. You've had to have met someone uglier than you, if not just physically, but just generally worse, that has had a mate. You've probably met hundreds.

No matter how wretched you are, no matter how wretched you look; there are still people out there for you.

However, I can't really find any words of advice, because it seems a major part of the story is missing. How do you interact with people? How do you carry yourself? How do you treat others? Do you attempt to socialize?
You take no responsibility for your situation, yet it's absolutely inarguable that our conscious minds and actions do have an affect on how we get along with others.

 

it's entirely possible to enjoy life even without a girl following you around. find other things that make you happy, and pursue them.

 

It's something I'm considering. I know someone through the internet around my age who's planning on undergoing 60k worth of procedures in january. He has that kind of money to burn and he's fairly methodical about his procedures. He claims to be even worse looking than me and if his procedures produce some kind of noticeable improvement, I will consider it myself.

Yes, but usually they're much older than me, lived in a different society under different circumstances and I believe they married fairly late in life.

The people around me are fairly closed off and very unfriendly towards me. I'm capable of making small talk but I'm never able to get on friendly terms with most people. The majority of my teen years were spent playing rts games. I've always been a nerd. I guess I could have made more of an effort to meet people but I don't think it would have affected any fundamental in my present situation.

 

It sounds likely to me that they would say the same of you. I'm an introvert myself, so it's hard for me to give specific advice on how to interact with people in a more personal manner. Typically for me it only comes with repeated interaction, or in rare cases with that 'click' of chemistry. Both can be accessed more easily by the right types of social gathering. Whether it be at work, some sort've club, a highly group oriented class, church luncheons, etc.

Also, helpful to me was a lot of online interaction; technically, I met my girlfriend online (but we only really clicked after talking on the phone). And that segues into: online dating and online dating services. Have you attempted any?

 

To the OP, what actually makes you happy in life? You say your a shut in, so while your shut in, what are you doing besides your suicidal thoughts?

Honestly....FUCK EVERYBODY ELSE!!! Get a degree, make your money, become successful and live a comfortable life. Life isnt all about gettin laid. I wish I knew that at your age (although I'm 5 years older).

If your really content with a determination to change yourself. Try some self help books. If you dont want to read, I'm pretty sure YouTube has video's.

 

Adding to what Homie B said, I theorize this is why jackass guys who treat girls like disposal cum dumpsters appeal to a significant portion of young teen girls and women.

Positive attitudes and worldly ambition is sexy even if for a fling.

 

Honestly, nobody can say anything to make it better, you just have to live it. One day youll find a girl and all this will go away. But she'll leave you or things wont work or whatever the case, youll find yourself in this same place again. Tis the cycle.

Listen to homie, just do you. Some people will like you, some wont, some will fuck you, some wont. Take them as they come and let them go as they please. Other people dont define you

 

before you love someone else, you have to love yourself

i need to take my own advice

 

yeah I have......

I had a profile active for 2 weeks and I knew it wasn't going anywhere so I just switched the photos around and kept the text exactly the same. I put a male models photos in place of my own and got around 20-30 messages in about a day. Since then, I haven't been able to make a profile of an attractive guy and not get any messages. I made profiles of misogynistic good looking guys. Disabled good looking guys. Clinically insane on 100 medications good looking guys. All of them got many hundred-folds the messages that I would ever hope to get.

I'm planning on setting up my profile again once I lose some weight. I'm skinny fat right now at ~160 lbs. I've heard once people get down to 10% bf, their face becomes much more angular.


In any case, here are some examples of profiles I made.

For instance I used this guy's photo to create a troll account of a disabled guy with only 1 leg:



and I used this photo to create a troll account of a misogynistic guy:

 

Ahem, you do know there is a huge stigma attached to online dating sites right?

It works sometimes, but it's seen as the method of last resort to meeting someone for a relationship.

This stigma applies to both men and women by the way.

Online dating works sometimes, but honestly I hear more failures than successes.

Also you only 21 right? You can't count rejections you get as a teen as part of your emotional foundation to the adult world of dating. Girls in their teens want the fantasy dreamboat and play around.

And then you got the really prime and proper girls who don't know who they are yet, or maybe they do but they got super strict parents...

So wipe your mind bro and start fresh without that chip on your shoulder

 

So idk I just want to point out the possibility that the reason the women on those dating sites you made those profiles at give you the results you do is because:

1. They're single because they're shallow (so guys screw and dump em) so they'll try their luck on online dating.

2. They are hot but emotionally not stable...and guys have fled from em.

3. Their profile is as fake as yours

4. Or a bit off all of the above.

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So that is what we all mean by go out and meet people.

This is the problem with nerds, they lack experience and they take their failure at dating or flirting way to personally as if its some academic test.

 

I'm gonna be presumptuous and say you have a personality like Leonard or Sheldon from "The Big Bang Theory". Smart ass hell, but no real inner workings of how a conversation works, especially with the opposite sex. That's cool dude, look at it as a trial and error, stimulus and response sort of experiment. Think of a gameplan, go somewhere, Wal-Mart at 3am on the weekends is a great time and start a convo. That stuff works, women like boldness...well some do. Example, I was at Dave & Busters with a few friends, I walked up to a beautiful woman and asked if I could take a pic with her. She actually said ok, I blurted out it may end up on MySpace (dumass). She smiled and laughed sayin no one uses that no more. I introduced myself and left.

If you like to stick to the online dating, Match.com has this group get together for your matches. Stop postin fake pics tho! Your lying to the women and yourself, shit like that will depress you even further. Be honest in your profile, but dont reveal everything about yourself. Leave some questionable material on it so a girl will send you a message.

 

You showed that your a troll on those sites but I say your a troll on this one without real pictures.

 

Regardless if he's trolling or not though.

He started a good conversation which I think this sub forum could benefit from and we can reference for other guys in his same situation.

@homie, women like some acts of boldness though. Some acts men consider bold, will earn a slap or even jailtime ...so its important to read the nonverbal.

Let's face it the best kind of flirting is the non scripted kind, that's why pickup lines don't usually work unless you trying to make a joke and lighten the mood with laughs. This usually works best in a group situation.