Disgusting...

Askmen.com has a frequent Top 10 list. On March 5th they posted "The 10 Subtle Ways to Tell Her She's Getting Fat". There are so many things wrong with this... (The girls at feministing said it perfectly):

That's right, how to deceive your partner into losing weight. This includes a slew of shame tactics, including:

• Buy her clothes that are too small (manipulation!)
• Serve her small portions of food (starvation!)
• Rig her chair to break under her (WHAT!)

Telling straight dudes that they should a. be turned off by their SO's weight gain to begin with and b. encouraging them to emotionally manipulate them and go as far to potentially injure them by rigging their fucking chair is reprehensible.



Send an email to the site and give them your "Top 10" of why they should take that feature down. And don't be subtle about it.

 

=[ this makes me sad.
as women, we have so many self-esteem issues as it is...i mean, i know i do, but if my partner told me i was "getting fat," it would devastate me. not to mention, these men are contemplating on pulling humiliating tricks on their partners to tell them that they are "getting fat," that's terrible no matter the gender. =[

this just owns up to the fact that they are not man enough to just come out and say what they are thinking to their partners faces. and this just makes me wonder if they really are in love with their partners to begin with because if you love someone you should have the capacity in your heart to accept them in any shape they are in and continue to think that they are the most beautiful thing in the world, that's just what real love does.

in my mind, at least. =/

 

they can't possibly be serious. jeez.

 

That's horrible. You don't do those kinds of things to someone you're supposed to care about. Wow.

 

True beauty is internal not external.

 

that was pretty awesome. i loved #5. who doesn't love a playful grab and squeeze?

i think you all are taking it too seriously.

 

Askmen.com have fat heads. And you know were they are stuck. Besides, girls with a little extra weight are more fun in bed than skinny chicks.

Right on Tie-Dye Dream. It's what in your heart. Not what's on your hips.

 

#8 and #6 are the only ones that I would ever use.

 

It's a bunch of boys playing around. Lighten up.

Psh, I disagree. You can do a lot more with fit girls than fat ones. Easier to lift and such.

 

But it's not funny! Things like that can really mess with a woman's self esteem. And people wonder why women are so hard on themselves? Playing around like that can hurt, whether intentional or not. What if a woman did that to a man? She'd be labeled a bitch!

 

Yeah, and a man would be labeled an asshole if he did that to a woman.
But if a woman wrote an article about how to, say, manipulate her man into doing stuff for her, do you think it would be met with similar outrage? I doubt it.

 

(dono if guys are suposed to post sorry if were not!)

those are some pretty screwed up things to do to any one :/
be happy with who you got, you were probly lucky to get them!

 

true and yes some women can get really screwed up because of men and their opinions

 

I say this as an overweight women myself: This might not be your personal brand of humor, but do you really think they actually expect a man to rig a chair to break? I think you need to keep in mind that the quality of the people who would actually do most of the things on this list is already low. That's what they're really making fun of.

 

Nicely said Still.

As for playing around like this hurting or effecting women's self esteem: I've learned that making others adapt because of a self esteem issue never really solves anything. It's just avoidance of a personal issue or at worse a justification for having a low self esteem and victim-hood.

Now don't get me wrong, I understand how other people and society etc. can effect one's self esteem but there's a point where we gotta put the SELF part back in and realize that the real problem is more in our own heads and there's only one person responsible for and able to fix that - your self.

 

I don't care what kind of humour is used.

It's disgusting.

 

I guess I'd be offended if I really believed they expected anyone to do these things, but my bullshit radar started beeping with the very first one- buying her clothes that are too small. Come on, guys. It's satire. Weak satire, I grant you, but take it for what it is. They're parodying those lists in Cosmo that give bad relationship advice that make both men and women look ridiculous. Cosmo- now there's a magazine that's degrading to women.

I guess I understand if you find it offensive, but at least recognize it for what it is: it's not a serious article, just like the "sexiest women in history" was not a serious article (how many guys you know fantasize about Joan of Arc?). It's not reasonable to treat it as such. Now, if you take offense to the fact that they find it funny, that's a different discussion. I don't, but I guess I understand if you do. But to suggest that the writers are ACTUALLY encouraging this behavior would be to take this a too literally.

 

I have to agree with you here! I went to our local Books A Million to browse magazines. All the womens interest ones were how to please your man, how to clean house, how to cook, etc. They didn't even have a selection of the many amazing feminist magazines or lesbian magazines... However their selection of nudie magazines in the mens interest section were bountiful. I was thinking of writing them a letter...

 

You absolutely MAY post here =) (However stay outta the lesbian forum I delete male posts there daily, even though there is a sticky at the top that announces men may not post there)

In fact many men are very active in womens rights and issues. There is NOMAS, National Organization for Men Against Sexism which are pro-feminist. And The White Ribbon Campaign, are men working to end men's violence against women.

Feel free to to post at any time

Peace!

 

I don't think any guy would do any of the things on the list or they'd get to hear endless comments like the ones already posted here. As some people have already said, this is obviously meant as satire-- all men who have had girlfriends/wives know all about which areas to avoid at all times, and body weight is one of them.

It's definitely not something worth getting upset over.