After a really horrific experience with LSD and DMT about two weeks ago, I have decided to make some changes. I allowed my ego to grow, I indulged in luxeries, I became sure of things. Of course you dont realize these things until brought to your attention by someone, or in my case, drugs. I felt it man, all of it. And it hurt. Once I realized the problem was myself, 5 hours had went by, I realized I had brought bad vibes, and took a huge shit of self infront of everyone, and worst of all, someone else had a bad trip because pr0ne went bat-shit. Im not going to go into detail atm, but its kind of funny, I experienced everything on this list to a T. How cliche? Delusion of control: This is a false belief that another person, group of people, or external force controls one's thoughts, feelings, impulses, or behavior. A person may describe, for instance, the experience that aliens actually make him or her move in certain ways and that the person affected has no control over the bodily movements. Thought broadcasting (the false belief that the affected person's thoughts are heard aloud), thought insertion, and thought withdrawal (the belief that an outside force, person, or group of people is removing or extracting a person's thoughts) are also examples of delusions of control. Nihilistic delusion: A delusion whose theme centres on the nonexistence of self or parts of self, others, or the world. A person with this type of delusion may have the false belief that the world is ending. Delusional jealousy (or delusion of infidelity): A person with this delusion falsely believes their spouse or lover is having an affair. This delusion stems from pathological jealousy, and the person often gathers "evidence" and confronts the spouse about the nonexistent affair. Delusion of guilt or sin (or delusion of self-accusation): This is a false feeling of remorse or guilt of delusional intensity. A person may, for example, believe they have committed some horrible crime and should be punished severely. Another example is a person who is convinced they are responsible for some disaster (such as fire, flood, or earthquake) with which there can be no possible connection. Delusion of mind being read: The false belief that other people can know one's thoughts. This is different from thought broadcasting in that the person does not believe their thoughts are heard aloud. Delusion of reference: The person falsely believes that insignificant remarks, events, or objects in one's environment have personal meaning or significance. For instance, a person may believe they are receiving special messages from newspaper headlines. Erotomania is a delusion in which one believes that another person is in love with him or her. They believe that this other person was the first to declare his or her affection, often by special glances, signals, telepathy, or messages through the media. Grandiose delusion: An individual is convinced they have special powers, talents, or abilities. Sometimes, the individual may actually believe they are a famous person or character (for example, a rock star). More commonly, a person with this delusion may believe they have accomplished some great achievement for which they have not received sufficient recognition (for example, the discovery of a new scientific theory). Persecutory delusion: These are the most common type of delusions and involve the theme of being followed, harassed, cheated, poisoned or drugged, conspired against, spied on, attacked, or obstructed in the pursuit of goals. Sometimes the delusion is isolated and fragmented (such as the false belief that co-workers are harassing), but sometimes are well-organized belief systems involving a complex set of delusions ("systematized delusions"). People with a set of persecutory delusions may believe, for example, they are being followed by government organizations because the "persecuted" person has been falsely identified as a spy. These systems of beliefs can be so broad and complex that they can explain everything that happens to the person. Religious delusion: Any delusion with a religious or spiritual content. These may be combined with other delusions, such as grandiose delusions (the belief that the affected person was chosen by God, for example), delusions of control, or delusions of guilt. Beliefs that would be considered normal for an individual's religious or cultural background are also often called delusions by some. However, religious beliefs are generally not addressed as "problems" or even "delusions" by physicians, perhaps except in cases of hyperreligiosity. Somatic delusion: A delusion whose content pertains to bodily functioning, bodily sensations, or physical appearance. Usually the false belief is that the body is somehow diseased, abnormal, or changed—for example, infested with parasites. Dont try to figure it out, because when you do, it changes up completely and (can) make you lose it. Hard. I dosed 2 hits of L, 5 more about 4 hours later. When peaking on those, eyeballed amounts of the best deemsters I have ever had were loaded up. I took 2 huge hits, and for the first twenty minutes it was heaven (complete understanding), then someone asked me to vape it for them, I got confused, and the next five hours were hell (complete mis-understanding) I feel fried. Im taking a break from psychs for a while, seeing furthur again on saturday, may be my first sober show.
Wow...Overall, are you glad it happened? if you could choose to, would you have liked to keep on being sure of things? in my experience, L has a very high "delusion" factor; i've experienced some of those symptoms [but not all] and COMPLETELY lost my shit on L [and ketamine] like i never have before. the whole time i thought i understood what i was doing, but when it hit me how little control i had over what was intended to be a mild trip i when completely bonkers. I guess the amount of ketamine was a "luxury" for sure, but that L thought me. I probably don't need to tell you this, as you're one of the most experienced psychedelic users on this forum, but it happened for a reason...it's unfortunate that your friend had a bad trip as well, but maybe she/he learned something as well. Any idea of your future intentions regarding psychedelics? Do you feel this experience will help your ego out? [you know what i mean] and if you ever feel like goen into more detail [necessary or otherwise] you know that most of the people on here [myself included] would be very interested in reading about it PEACE.
I like shermins reply. Anyways its just more experience under your belt bro. Do what you think is right of course.
I am grateful it happened, I am just not comfortable. I do not beleive we can truely be sure of anything, we are just tricking ourselves. It did happen for a reason, the setting got fucked for me when I was asked to vape DMT for someone while I couldnt even comprehend my face... Then it was like a tree from there. Fear, I have never felt true fear before this occurance. At the moment, TBH, I am scared shitless to mix psychedelics. Yep, maybe I had too much too fast, or I just over played my part. But I sure have learned a lesson, and right now things are trippy enough and I have no desire to ingest another psychedelic until I have came off the last trip. This was the night of the bethlaham show, and shit is still melting.
I will try soon, what I worked up in my head was so fucking complex and taught, it will be hard sharing with you guys. But I really REALLY am grateful for these couple posts that you and Fresh have posted. Making me feel good. This is a time for healing for me, and all kind words and advice from everyone here is SO greatly appreciated. I love you people, I really do.
Ya cheers dude hope you figure out what needs to be figured. :cheers2: Mixing psyches like that is no joke, come to think of it I haven't really ever mixed psychedelics I don't think so I need to get on that. Carefully though
im excited and happy that things'll only get better for you and thank you for the post, i found it very useful and nice
Since I'm passing your way today... I just stopped in 'cause I want to say,.. ... youll be alright man.. you are, you are, you are, you are being.. .
Good for you for realizing how full of shit you are. (Not sarcastic) I personally veer back and forth from the delusion that I am honest with myself.
well it finally happened pr0ne. just what you were waiting for - a "bad" trip. sounds like it was everything you thought it would be? i'm sure you'll make it through OK man. and like shermin said, if you ever feel the need to elaborate, i'd be interested in reading. or if you feel the need to talk to someone..hit me up take it easy and take care of yourself
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVdTQ3OPtGY"]YouTube- Grateful Dead - Ripple there are some things that no one will ever understand healing is part of the natural progression of life; after my bad L+K experience i HAD to step back and look at things from a distance. I am still to this day confused by the experience but that's just the name of the game peace.
Same shit happened to me when i took 500mg of mdma after snorting 3 oc80's. I used to think i could handle any amount of drugs but they sure put me in my place. eventually it passes, and you will be back to your old self...
whoa whoa whoa.....dude are u for real? honestly, did u really think that was going to be a good combo??
The whole point is to not go back to my old self, bad trips happen because of that old self. Snakes cant hold onto their skin forever. That shit collects scum off the ground.
Talk to your friends about it. Ive been in situations where fellow trippers including myself have gone bat-shit insane, and while those trips were uncomfortable and potentialy life shattering, what is good is analyzing the insanity in depth - when on the comedown/sobering up. You need to let your fiends know your sorry and you were not in controll. Everyone fucks up a trip now and again, but what ive noticed is sometimes even the worst trips can bring friends closer together. I would certainly wait at least 4 weeks before having a redemption trip. Good luck,
Maybe not real soon, but maybe try a trip alone, to be alone. How did those delusions relate to your self in that experience? I'm personally familiar with a few of them, from going around and around in my own mind concerned with the most futile. Relations between people do well in fueling that fire. I suppose emotional tenderness after psychedelia progressed into such things, but it wasn't until a few neutral/bad experiences till I was able to move on to the next level. After experiences like those I find the confusion now leads into peace as opposed to the way it used to be for me. I hope your mental state progresses into peace because you realized the whole shock of the experience was realizing delusions harmful potential. Now that you may be aware of the certain delusions you can move away from them. Much goodness to you, sir. All is.
Also I'd like to say you don't need to be sorry to anyone. Perhaps with your friends significance in your mind I wouldn't even discuss it with them as the first person you should get understanding from is yourself.
You sound like you came out of it alright; and you'll be fine. When I had my trainwreck uber-bad trip that landed me in the hospital, I wasn't so sure my mind would ever come together again - for months after I'd have little 'aftershocks' here and there. But in the end it was absolutely for the best. I'm not saying I'm happy it happened, as it was beyond awful, but it did help me in a lot of ways.
^What others are saying, words of encouragement, of understanding, of hope^ I had some of those delusions and so on (and then was living moments in the future so I knew everything that was going to happen before it happened - oh God, I can't live like that!) and realized I really was standing at the edge and I could step off or I could step back. I didn't use psychedelics for the next ~35 years (except once with my Mom when she was dying) and now easing back in. LSD completely turned my life around. I've never stopped giving thanks for that.
