OK... my best friend is getting hooked on blow. I am losing her... she's been avoiding me for days, been weird, lied to me... hangs out in NYC with those "movie producers" and other "rich" people who go to after-parties in fancy hairdressing salons at 5am to blow coke on glass tables. She thinks they love her and are her new best friends. She dropped out of college... is quitting her job... Last few times I saw her, she was skinny, big dark circles underneath her eyes, those almost getting out of their orbits, super tense, like she had a fucking wooden stick up her ass, and shaking, shaking like crazy. Now, I'm wondering, was I wrong, last time she was crashing and having a panic attack, to totally freak out on her, yell at her, ask her if she'd already a hole between her nostrils and if she was coughing like crazy, was she coughing, blood, yet? Was I wrong to talk about my best friend who died of hyperthermia? Was I wrong to call her naive and immature? I feel like shit And the more I have to deal with people like that, the more I think most humans are fucking miserable and should just blow their brain out instead of wasting their life on earth. I am becoming so sour... it's disgusting.
Your friends situation will come to an end. No one can live that kind of insanity for long without it crashing in on them. If she doesn't listen to you she'll learn the hard way. Unfortunately that's the way most of us do learn. It sucks for you to have to see her fuck up her life. I don't think we should all shoot ouselves. I'm traveling down my journey and am going to see where it takes me. It's all in the mind.
mmmmmmmmmm the cuervo gold...the fine columbian makes tonight a wonderful thing...yummy. I've sone it prob around 10 times and love it. I don't get addicted to things easily though. Can you tell her parents and they can throw her in rehab?
I've been through it myself, and I can tell you that nobody can save her BUT herself. It's a miserable guilt ridden life. She is living her own hell, I can assure you that. Denial goes on forever...it'll take something major to happen before she opens her eyes. There's nothing you can do sweetie. Just remember, it's not her right now...that is such an evil drug that it completely consumes you. You live for it eventually, and it just becomes a chore.
No, I don't think you were wrong. You didn't coddle her or enable her habit. I've seen the situations where everyone pretends there is no problem....it is mutually and politely ignored until it is too late.
Coke is messed up. Don't hate your friend. She'll probably come around. And if you can give her encouragement at the proper time then that will be perhaps the fulcrum she needs when at some time any straw will be the camel's last. Everyone I know is totally addicted to coke. I did it for years. I came around. So can she. One word said at the right time can equal a million said at the wrong time. Wait for your chance. Jesus!!! My best friend is epileptic and still smokes crack. My other best friend's brother sells his own brother, my friend, crack. They're not bad people, all of them, though some are. Mostly, they just became overcome. Coke is a low sort of empathogenic which works through abundant brain chemicals to change natural biological work/reward centers, and provide emotional stmulation in a world of inertia. How can a person beat that? Pushers know that too. And like you said they love you and you love them. Everyone loves their connections. Maybe if she knew how entirely common having a drug problem made her she wouldn't be lead into that path through some misleading notion of its glamour. Hell, I lived in a party in the French Quarter for years and years. It's not glamourous, especially when people are chewing their jaws with their noses running, hyperventilating and talking about all their lifelong ambitions with strangers, fucking weird consorts not out of love or even pleasure but just to score. That reminds me of this couple I knew who shot heroin and smoked crack and fucked all the time. The guy woould nod off while standing on his feet and she had this green skin like I have never seen before. Hmmmm....glamourous indeed.
