I knew I would have to make this decision sooner or later, I still have a few months to think about it but I've pretty much made up my mind that I do not want him to be circumcised for several reasons. I just wanted to hear what you guys had to say... did you have your sons circumcised and why or why not? was it for religious or cultural reasons? my boyfriend is still undecided because he is, and he kind of wants the same thing for his son. I worry a little because I don't want him to be ashamed of himself in any way, I don't want him to feel different and be embarrassed and I know that most un-circumcised boys question themselves at some point because it is not the norm. If he grows up and really wants to be circumcised he could do it then. right? I think it's better that way than to just cut it off without him knowing any different.... I would rather explain to him that I wanted him to have the choice, then have to explain to him why I cut off part of his body... I just don't think there is any real reason for me personally to do it. Some people bring up the hygiene deal... is that really a big issue? I just don't think it's worth it. I hadn't completely made up my mind about it, but I just stumbled upon this site , and some of these quotes really make my stomach turn... did any of you experience anything like this? I can't even imagine... I also just read in another post that circumcision can cause problems breastfeeding? whats the deal with that?
I lucked out in that we didn't have to face this decision, however...We did discuss it, and do research, and I found that there was TOO MUCH PROOF that it harmed and not enough proof that, it in anyway, was helpful. Frankly, if you want a more hygenic son, teach him more about proper hygiene when he's growing up. Ask your pediatrician (and your OBGYN before the birth for those first weeks) about how to properly care for an uncircumsized penis. Also, last I read, it was close to 46% of the population (male, of course), is uncircumsized, so he won't be much different from people. And in any event, he'll be able to decide for himself one day whether or not to undertake unneeded cosmetic surgery. Plus, and I'm not sure about this, wouldn't the stress of the situation *because they don't usually do more than a topical anesthetic and it hurts alot* would harm a breastfeeding relationship. Maggie would know.
We also had girls, but did discuss circumcision because you just never know. my husband and I went round and round on this issue. Eventually the clincher was when he asked my OB his questions (since here it is the OB who performs the circs in the hospital). "is there any medical reason to have it done?" doc said "no, the only reason to circumcise your baby would be either because of your religious beliefs or out of ignorance" "what percentage of baby boys do you circumcize?" doc said it's about 50-50 The way I see it, it can always be done later, but it can never be undone. so to err on the side of caution would be to wait until the child is an adult and chooses for himself whether that's what he wants.
Proper care of the uncircumsized penis is to do nothing. Forthe first four or five years of their life the foreskin is firmly attached to the head of the penis. As the child plays with it at around four or five they begin to loosen this attachment. When it is fully lossened you can teach them to gently pull the skin back and give it a quick wash with plain water. You don't need to do anything else. I am the mother of five boys and one girl. When my older boys were born I did whatever the doctor said to do without questioning why. So they were all circ'ed. With my little one I have asked all kinds of questions and have done everything different with him. He is intact and will remain so unless he decides to change that when he is an adult. Very very rarely is there a medical reason that requires circumcism. My exhusband is one of those rare cases. The cause of his problem though was that his parents never taught him how to take care of himself. As a result of the skin not being pulled back and cleaned on a regular basis, it just began to grow shut. Consequently it had to be removed. Other than this very rare medical condition, there is no reason to cause such pain and torture to these tiny little boys. Men should go out of this world with all the parts they came into it with. Please leave your little boy with all his parts intact. Kathi
I had a girl, but discussed circumcision with my boyfriend just in case. We both decided we would want to have it done. It was for personal reasons, and no, that isn't selfish. We figured our son would have had more confidence in himself and it would be cleaner. Yes, he could have it done later in life, but it's so much more painful. My boyfriend and I have a friend that was uncircumcised and just last year (20 years old) had himself circumcised, and said it was the most painful thing he'd ever experienced in his life, but that he's happy it's been done.
I was so happy when I didn't have to make the decision when I had my daughter. I did have my son circumcized because it is my husband's belief (muslim), but I do not think it is necessary and I don't think that a boy would feel embarrassed either way because there are plenty of circ'd and uncirc'd. My sister had 4 boys, none of which were circumcized and they have never had problems. My best friend also did not circ her two boys, but her oldest had to be done at age 6 in France (where it is not common at all) because of a birth defect. She had wished she had done it at birth just to save him from having to go thru that so old, but he is fine now. This is one of those very controversial decision, but just feel confident in your choice and don't let anyone make you feel bad about it! Good luck and congrats on your baby boy!!
Do Not Circumcise Your Son. As many have pointed out it benefits nothing in terms of hygiene and more and more people are refusing to let their boy babys be cut for no reason. It is a cruel and pointless procedure that should not be inflicted on any infant.
My son is NOT circ.'d, and he has what is called a "pinhole phimosis" which is very NORMAL. As mentioned by Dakota's Mom, the glans of the penis is attached to the foreskin for several years and works it's way to detachment through growth and yanking FORWARD in exploration and play. Thus far I've noticed that it went from being like a pouty turtleneck when gently pushed back to opening with less of a pout... I have faith in that mother nature will do the right thing. At first I was thinking "damned if you do & damned if you don't" but started to do some research online and discovered it's NORMAL. Be VERY sure in your decision, as there is a lot of pressure to cut it off. My husband was asked SEVERAL times if we wanted a circ. for our newborn (they never asked me.) and he was firmly against it (even though he's circ.'d himself) He sometimes (my dh) wishes that he weren't circ'd because he feels like there is a part of him missing, that he was done violence on, and that his penis would be more sensitive... I've had lovers in the past that were also circ.'d and they expressed the same thing. Another reason to leave the choice up to the person who wants it done in the future, is that they are MEDICATED for pain (at least in first-world countries) Babies that are circumcised in their first hours-days of life ARE NOT. Babies in the Medical Industry are vastly under-medicated for pain, because ppl are afraid to medicate babies for some reason... I was taught this in nursing school, and was taught to learn the subtle signs of pain in a baby. I've assisted and witnessed circ.s being performed as a nursing student (while pregnant) and none of the baby's where medicated, nor was there an "application of numbing ointment" utilized. Because it increases bleeding to that area. There are 2 different kinds of procedures practiced here, excision of the foreskin using surgical equipment and a scalpel, and a plasti-bell that is placed on and falls off as the skin dies (they do something similar to lambs to remove the tail, like a rubber-band around the finger...) None of the baby's that I witnessed received any anesthetic, pain medication or comfort post procedure... they application of antibiotic ointment on the beet red glans and sugar water drops into the mouth (said to stimulate the release of "pain-altering" endorphins) The baby is also strapped down on a specialized circ. board to hold them still. It's a molded plastic board, not cushioned, nor blanketed... afterwards they apply a dressing and wrap 'em up and leave 'em to cry it out. Have you ever ran your finger against your eye? That is what the surface of the glans penis feels like, now expose that to air, urine, and then if your not on top of changing the diaper every hour, ammonia. The opening of the urethra is at risk of erosion and infection. Scarring and botched circ.s are more common than ppl like to think. Also, this is something that I have to admit that I wasn't on top of myself... watch out that your pediatric doctor at any well child check at anytime, doesn't go ahead and FORCE THAT FORESKIN BACK without you giving consent. That's what happened to my son at his last check up. The Quack just jammed his foreskin back without any warning. Boy did my son YELP and later that days I saw him grabbing at his weeny and holding it, luckily haven't seen any complications yet, but if something manifests? Adhesions from scar tissue... Also, not wanting to stir up shit, because I love everyone, but it is arguable in the Islamic faith as well that circumcision is required & infact there ARE Muslims that believe circumcision is against the Islamic Faith, I've read many papers publish arguing that until we stop forcing circumcision on boys, circumcision on girls won't stop... Radical thought I know, but I had to put it out there, with love of-course. Not wanting to offend but to point out that exemption because of faith isn't.
What the hell use is circumcision? All the penises ive ever seen have been natural. I saw a circumcised penis once and it looked very strange to me Why chop off parts of your sons bodies? Normally, theyre born perfect. Its there for a reason
WOW! They're born perfect...thats it exactly...thank you for putting it so simply. Circumsion is a barbaric practice inflicted on helpless victims. Stupid and Mean.
It's strange how the discourse is so different in the states, compared to Europe. Over here, circumcision is pretty much only done if you're Jewish.
Once you see a circumcision, it has a profound effect on most people (everyone i know). I have 3 boys all are intact. When dealing with mates and the argument. I usually say a simple "have you seen a circumcision" and "your going to stay with the baby while it is being done" has worked wonders. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XmX6RdRNoqk https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wyuuRINXHtU https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JoIegXdBHTk Click at your own risk, i couldn't even watch these all the way through. I think most people can't, hence having such a profound effect on any circ options.
We're not having our son cicumcised. His father isn't circumcised and it has never been an issue for him while growing up or now. We don't see a point to it. We aren't religious, and it just seems like unnecessary harm. Cruel, really. There's no way I'm doing that to my baby boy!
Honestly, I hate it when babies are circumcized when not for a religious reason. I'm Jewish and therefore my sons will be because the bris ceremony is as important to me and a Christening is important to many Christians. It is unnecessary and really almost a fly in the face of people who do it for religious reasons when it is done for just aesthetic reasons.
wow those videos are horrible. I really can't imagine doing that to my perfect little baby. I will have to make my bf watch them, and I'm sure he'll feel the same. a small part of me still worries that having him circumcised would be cleaner and give him more confidence as moon flower said. but I just don't think it's really worth it. I can't imagine hurting him like that. It really is strange how different it is in other countries compared to the US. I don't understand why it became so accepted by just about everyone without any religious reasoning. it seems so incredibly stupid. but I still worry about him being different because it is so accepted here. I think though that even if he is teased during childhood he will appreciate it later in life. at least I hope so. I guess one reason i'm worried about his self confidence and body image and all that because Ive heard so many girls in college and whatnot make a pretty big deal about it if a guy she slept with wasnt circumcised. Just like it was such an odd thing, and that it somehow made him less attractive. that its just "gross". I personally don't agree, but that is the general outlook about it here in the us. But still I can't see having it done to my son. He shouldnt ever be with a girl that shallow anyway, and it is becoming more and more accepted everyday to not be circ. Its just such a stupid prcedure if it's not done for religious reasons. I hate that we even have to make this decision, becuase there is so much pressure to have it done. Makes me wish I lived in europe.
i have been back and forth on the whole circumcision thing. the father wants him circumcised and my family thinks he should be. i think its only because thats all they know and they think its just the normal thing to do. but really they don't seem to have any concrete reason why it should be done. i was starting to kind of lean in the direction of just letting his dad decide. but the more i think about it i am not really comfortable with it. and watching those videos made me cry. i can't believe that anyone thinks that is ok, or that i was actually thinking about letting that happen to my son. i don't think i could sleep at night knowing that i allowed that to happen to him. especially since i have not seen one valid reason for doing it.
I didn't haven't it done to my son. Same reasons already mentioned here, no real valid point in doing it and crazy painful cruel. His foreskin retracts now (he's almost 4) and he washes down there when he's in the tub. No hygene problems so far. many little girls have hygene-infection problems down there and you don't go trimming stuff off. I believe they are born the way they should be. PS my son's dad is circ'ed but just hearing how they do it was enough for him to say "no way" to it. We were fortunate to have a wonderful midwife who was from England and had uncirc'ed grown sons of her own, so no pressure was ever put on us at his birth. another reason to avoid hospital births if you don't have a medical problem, in my opinion.
Saltydog. My advice is to have the babydaddy sit down and watch those videos, full volume, not allowed to keep his eyes shut, and not allowed to turn it off. Afterward, ask him how much of a good idea he thinks it is.
I was also really lucky and didn't have to make this decision. We really talked about it a lot though. I am firmly against it, I don't think that it's fair at all! My hubby wanted it done because his is, but he gradually changed his mind....especially when the doc told him that they no longer cover it here under the Alberta Health Care plan and since it's deemed a cosmetic procedure, we would have to pay $500 for it. I was soooo happy when I heard that! So needless to say, had we had a boy, it wouldn't have happened. It's a costly procedure. I just think that it's so mean. I have read stories of little girls in other countries that have their labia sewn sut and their clitorus (sp?) cut off. We would read that and think, "how MEAN!!!!!!!!" But it's the same thing for baby boys over here! It's just sp normal now, no one seems to think that it's a huge deal.
It just never occured to me to circ, because it's not that common in Europe and we have no religious reason to. My mother and I watched a bris on a TV show and when they got to circ part she was baffled and disturbed by it. Reading succulentflower's post was horrifying, how the fuck did that shit ever become 'normal'? I think a lot of the stigma about cleanliness and aesthetics has been caused by circing being the norm, so anything else seems weird/gross [not that the penis is generally seen as beautiful either way]. If anything that's a reason not to circ, we need a backlash aganist this, to prove that there is nothing wrong with the natural male body.
