Breastfeeding/Nursing/co-sleeping

I'm planning on getting pregnant in the future, who knows when! But anyways I want opinions/stories/advice from you hippie mommas about breast feeding. Best position to do it in? Nursing bras? How old did you breast feed your kids until? Did you breast feed them clothed/not (you not them lol)?

Then with co-sleeping, same thing, I've been doing alot of research on it, but I want to hear opinions from parents who've done it! What did you think? How did you/baby sleep? Multiple kids? ect

Thanks :sunny:

 

I breastfed my son until he was 2 and I am currently nursing my 6-day-old daughter. I believe in child-led weaning so she will nurse as long as she wants. Positions and nursing bras are very individual, so what I have used might not work for you.

I also coslept with my son and am cosleeping with my daughter. My son moved into a twin bed when he was 1 because he's a very wiggly sleeper and we were waking each other up. It was a very easy transition and he still gets to sleep in the big bed sometimes, which we both love.

I hope things work out for you.

 

I fed my son until he was 3 yo. I tried the child led weaning, but I could see him breastfeeding forever he loved it so much. We called it "Yummies" because the world still isn't ready to hear "breastmilk", yet and it was easy for little ones to say.

I co slept and still let them sneak into my bed sometimes. When they get older, just be prepared to be woken with a foot or hand on your face sometimes. But, it's nice when this warm little body sneaks over to your side sometimes and they have that nice sleepy smell. So cute.

Breastfeeding position is what works for you and bub. If you feed two at a time, (different ages or twins), then you can lay them with their legs under your arms. Don't know why, but it's called the "Football hold". Not a sports spectator, so it's lost on me. You can support their heads with a pillow so you arms do get tired holding them up. If just feeding one at a time, then just cradle them in your arms as per usual, if it works for you.

Don't be upset or feel like a failure if you have problems with cracked nipples or getting the baby to attach properly. Many women experience this and because it's not discussed, think they are doing something wrong or feel bad. It's supposed to be the most natural thing in the world, but whilst that's true, there's no shame in asking to see a lactation consultant if you need to. If you can't breastfeed for some reason, don't beat yourself up about that either.

I know someone who has tried everything and her milk supply just won't increase. This is her 3rd child. Poor thing was crushed and thought everyone would judge her to be an unfit mother, but there's a whole lot of other things that make for good parenting. I hugged her and told her she was doing a good job as a mum.

Not saying you will have problems. Just saying, as a mother of 18 years, it's something that's not talked about, like we all pretend our lives are perfect and if something doesn't work as well as planned, woman can tend to beat themselves up.

I'm sure you'll make a fine mother.

 

as far as breastfeeding goes USE LANOLIN ON YOUR NIPPLES!
i had twins, and used the 'football hold' for 2 months, then i started to notice the excruciating pain. upon examination, i found that my nipple was cracked all the way around where it meets the areola. absolutely horrible pain. some blood when i pumped. by the time i was healed i had started to decrease production, and they were getting so used to the bottle that they weren't that interested. i have deep regrets about that, and i believe that if i had still been breastfeeding my older twin would have had a better chance, he died from SIDS (which of course, is a non-answer as to cause of death). breastfed babies wake up more, because it digests faster than formula, so they get hungry again.

dont think im trying to bring you down or anything, the story of my life is just like that, and brutal (at times) honesty is my way of coping. some babies die. fact of life. moving on.

i stayed home most of the time, and my boys were born in june, so it was a very hot time for me. i generally wore a flowy skirt as my only attire, pulled up like a long tube top. i just pulled it to its skirt position to feed them, usually in the middle of the bed so i could recline. i did make myself a VERY lightweight poncho (summer, ugh) to wear if we had company or anything, but i rarely used it.
i also did night feedings in bed, laying on my side, with one on each side of me. i only started to roll over on them once or twice, but you can feel them there, i think it would be hard to completely roll over on a baby unless you were trashed or something, which you shouldnt do if you are breastfeeding anyway.

nursing bras are a mixed bag. on the one hand, its another purchase, you only use them while you are breastfeeding, and they tend to give limited support. on the other hand, youll need new bras anyway for the giant food production line (my boobs got SO HUGE, then basically deflated after they dried up) and they do offer some support. they make tank tops that look like they give better support, but the only one i had was a hand-me-down from a friend, and it was too big for me.
as far as other stuff, ask for help if you need it, and try washable pads for inside your bra. i used the disposables, and they dont stay and they feel icky. i wish i had had a set of nice cloth ones. im going to make a lot of new reusable stuff for next baby. also, you can get cloth menstrual pads online now, if you cant make your own (there are a lot of patterns online too) that would be way better than the giant diaper things you have to wear postpartum (all those periods you miss while pregnant seem to come right at the end, lol) and until you get pregnant i highly recommend the Diva cup, for its reusableness, and because it will likely encourage you to use those muscles and do more kegels.

when my mom was preggo with me she didnt drive, she walked everywhere. she was in labor for 8 hours. my brothers were born after she learned to drive, they were 34 and 36 hours, respectively. she credits the walking, and i believe her! with twins, i expected to have a c-section. i hoped for vaginal, but knew it was unlikely. my body started to shut down, so emergency c-section it was for me. if you feel you have a risk of that, just make sure you have a good doctor. my doctor did my moms hysterectomy, so i trusted him entirely. next time i will have him as well. a good doctor is worth their weight in gold. i have since gone for my lady checkup with a new doctor, and she remarked how awesome my scar was, small and neat, compared to most that shes seen.

feel free to shoot me a PM, i dont always check the parenting forum. i must have read every book i could get my hands on to prepare for twins. when i had them in my arms, i was over-ready. didnt have any trouble adjusting or caring for them. i think its veryy smart to prepare as much as possible before hand, and then you can refresh your memory as the time draws near. "what to expect when you're expecting" is a great book, and there are two what to expect books that come after it, that i know of. if you are going to have 1 book about being pregnant, thats the one i would get. name books are good too, but ask around and see if a friend has one first. my "encyclopedia of baby names" is on loan at the moment. everybody is having babies but me.

 

Cosleeping is one of the number one causes of SIDS

It's absolutely irresponsible and I don't care who I offend.

 

FYI, i wasnt cosleeping regularly, but sometimes you do dose off when breastfeeding on your side. he was not in bed with me when he passed. everything is a choice, and everything is risk management. i slept on my belly as a baby, i lived. not every child who cosleeps dies, just as not all babies whose parents follow every 'rule' to the letter lives. it is a personal choice, if YOU feel it is irresponsible then YOU should not do it. it is not up to YOU to see that my child survives to adulthood, thats my job, and my prerogative. i desire to pass my genetics on, and i will give my offspring the care i feel is best.
everything about SIDS is "seems to" seems to afflict multiples more often, seems to affect belly sleepers (of course, back sleepers get a flat head, so its not without issues) seems to affect infants who fail their first hearing test (high bloodpressure during birth damages some CO2 sensor in the ear) everything seems to and isnt a real answer. i do not believe in scaring women with seems to. the information should be given, but even if you do everything 'right' some babies just seem to die.

 

That is a good point.

I don't appreciate your tone. (Though I suppose I can see where mine could've been better) Frankly, there are too many babies in the world. It is more for the well-being of the adults that are considering it that I say so.

I saw a medical show one time and this mother had all three of her babies die of SIDS, years apart. All three she coslept with and this medical investigator broke the news to her, after he found that most likely they suffocated against her body (she was overweight) and I've never seen anyone cry so hard.

They do say you can cosleep more safely; but I don't see the point in risking it. There are many other ways to bond with your child. (For instance, emphasizing carrying over a stroller.)

A friend of mine that is a young mother coslept sometimes; I warned her just the same.

 

Wow, that's not even a little bit true and really hurtful to the mom who lost her baby. Cosleeping actually reduces the risk of SIDS because the mom and baby breathe and wake in sync and the baby doesn't sleep as deeply. Humans weren't designed to sleep in separate rooms from their families. They're meant to sleep near people, which is why couples share a bed and parents often share a bed with their children. Dr. Sears' website has annotated information on cosleeping and SIDS.

BTW, smothering a baby (the much-feared "rolling over on them in your sleep") isn't SIDS. SIDS, by definition is death from an unknown cause. A mother who is not medicated or obese on a safe sleeping surface with her baby will NOT roll over on him/her. There have been cases of babies dying in beds, couches, or chairs with siblings, adults that are not their mother, or alone. This is not the same thing as safe cosleeping! Just as you don't roll off the bed because you know the edge is there, even in your sleep, so the mother knows the baby is there even in her sleep.

I coslept with my son for a year and I am currently cosleeping with my 3-week-old daughter. If I am alone in the bed, I wiggle around, kick, roll over, etc. If my daughter is in the bed, I wake up in the exact same position I went to sleep in because my body knows that she's there.

 

By the way, I saw that show. That doctor was an absolute ASS to that poor woman. There are many proposed causes for SIDS that could explain the deaths of her children - faulty breathing regulation in the brain, hormonal imbalances, etc. It's ridiculous to think that she could have smothered BOTH her twins in her sleep at the same time and not realized she was laying on them (they died the same night). And they weren't teeny babies when they died, they were several months old, so it's absolutely ridiculous to think that she wouldn't have felt them if she were laying on them.

Also, as I said before, suffocation and SIDS are not the same thing. Autopsies are done when babies die unexpectedly. If the babies were suffocated, there would have been fibers inside their nasal passages (from the mother's clothes, pillowcases, etc) and burst blood vessels from their struggles to draw breathe. If a medical examiner saw any evidence of suffocation, the deaths would not have been deemed SIDS. Equating SIDS with accidental suffocation is a misconception that continues to plague cosleepers, since they are not the same thing at all.

 

No it's not, she said it herself that she didn't lose her baby while cosleeping.
And if the baby did, it very well could be considered her fault; and while there's no point to be harping on the past, recognizing that could save baby's lives and mother's feelings in the future.

The fact is, cosleeping raises a babies chance of dying. This is exacerbated by alcohol or drug use; but even without those factors, I ask once again; why risk it?

You do not need to sleep in the same bed for a baby to learn off of your breathing, the same room does fine; and the American Academy of Pediatrics happens to recommend sleeping in the same room, but not the same bed.

I completely do not believe you. What did he look like?

 

Wow, you're pretty much an ass yourself. If I didn't see it, how did I know she lost her twins in the same night? It's been a long time since I saw it, but I remember he was an skinny older guy with gray hair. I certainly didn't take notes on his appearance. Did you even look at the studies on Dr. Sears' page?

And in case you haven't noticed, the studies that have been in the news in recent years insisting that a baby MUST be in a crib are sponsored by the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission. They're making money from the sale of all these cribs. If a crib isn't used, they're not making any money, so of course they're going to recommend one. It's a conflict of interest. It's like a formula company sponsoring a breastfeeding study that (surprise surprise) shows that breastfeeding and formula are just the same. The people paying for the study can twist the findings around to support their own agenda, which is why only third-party studies with no monetary gain either way are the only realistic ones.

 

She did not have twins.

As I said in my original post, it was three babies, all years apart.

Must've been a different show, but the details you've given me make me believe that you weren't just making it up. I apologize for the mistrust; but the overly passionate style of debate led me to believe that you would say anything to protect your stance.

No, I did not look at the studies. I am uninterested in it, as I have heard both sides of the situation and have made my decision.
I wish you luck with yours, but will continue to warn those that may listen to my opinion.

The CPSC has a lot more to deal with then just cribs. For instance, books that push cosleeping.
It's not a conflict of interest at all. That is the whole point of the organization.

 

In China, the family bed is most common. SIDS is so rare in China, that they don't even have a word for it.

Not the point, but co-sleeping is defined as sharing a room, bed-sharing is defined as, well bed-sharing.

 

Thank you for correcting me.

 

While both of you make good points, and you are more than welcome to share your thoughts, I think some discretion should have been used when talking about the death of infants to a woman who experienced it. Aaaanyways.........

My son slept in a Moses basket on the floor next to our bed when he was an infant, on his back. I was pretty devastated when I couldn't breastfeed for more than a few days, but both of us were getting stressed out about it, so we switched and he was much happier. At about 6 wks he was sleeping in the cradle in our room, then at about 2 months he switched to his crib in his room. As a baby, that boy was the best sleeper, best eater, no-fuss baby ever!!

Now, he's a toddler and the name Taj-manian devil has never been more applicable. When we switched him to a toddler bed because he was climbing out of the crib (age 22 mos) we would often find him in our bed in the morning. This happened so frequently he started referring to our bed as "Taj-y bed?". Just last week we moved his bed in our room because he is too wiggly to sleep with us. He usually spends half the night in his bed, half in ours. Baby steps I guess.

 

You are probably right.

I didn't mean for my post to be in response to hers; I don't even know how much I read of hers first, but Muna sure took the opportunity to make me look like an asshole (and if she thought mine was in response to Mother's, even that may be justified).

 

Justified vs Needed are two totally different things. Again, this is the Internet and you are more than welcome to contribute.

I just politely ask you to consider if it's necessary? Don't mean to start anything, just throwing it out there.

 

I'm a cosleeping nursing mom. My daughter is two. I think there are safe ways to do anything and everyone who co-sleeps should practice it safely, just like someone who puts a child in a crib should make sure that the crib itself is safe and nothing in the crib is endangering the child.

My daughter just turned two, she still sleeps with me, she still nurses CONSTANTLY. I know it's because we're always around each other, because whenever I've worked she's been fine without. It's hard for me to wean her, I do believe in child weaning, but I feel like another mom said, she could go on forever and I'm starting to not enjoy it as much. I think is because I don't have friends or family around that I trust with my daughter so we're ALWAYS together and I feel like I don't really get a break from it, but I do know is what's best for her. I mean she's been sick two times in her life. It's just that she still prefers it over food and I have a problem restricting it. I do the whole don't offer, don't refuse, but she still nurses like an 8 month old baby.

There's a part of me that feels if we spent a little time away from each other more frequently it would help with the weaning, but she's very attached to me when I'm around. I just want to decrease the frequency of it and don't know how to handle that without it being traumatic for any of us. She still even wakes up to nurse. I do the whole don't refuse, don't offer, but I never had to offer haha

Starting was easy, she kinda was born knowing what to do and I had no struggles whatsoever with that. I feel really lucky in that aspect because I know a lot of moms do have issues and it's very sad and difficult to deal with.
.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxv6R9fUO74"]YouTube - ‪Breastfeeding...at 8.‬‏

 

Your point is?