my girlfriend of 2+ years and i have tried anal sex about 3 or 4 times. on any given night she likes just a little bit of anal play which turns me on that she enjoys it. (we use plenty of lube and foreplay before any anal play/sex) the problem is that each time weve tried anal sex a) its never been good for her at the time and b)she says that in the day or 2 afterwords she experiences "problems" she hasnt told me explicitly what these "problems" are which i why theyre in quotes. but ive just assumed it means being really sore afterwords or actually having bowell problems as a result. id like to know if anyone whos done anal could tell me what problems could be arising and if its possible to work around these problems
your assumptions are problems that occur for me. so its possible that they occur also for her. there isnt much you can do if she is sore, besides not doing it... but the soreness will subside the more you do it. as for bowel problems... she could have IBS, (what i have)... which is irritable bowel syndrome. when it becomes irratated, from food, or lifestyle or actual "irritation" then it causes the bowel to go a bit crazy and it hurts and its unpleasant and there are a few other things that come with that. i dunno.... my experiences... are probably useless...
One girl, who did anal for the first time with me, told me that the day after rough anal she had the feeling that she couldn't hold in shit for a while. Perhaps because her sphincter was in shock? Anyhow, after a while her asshole started adapting to it as we did it more often, and after a couple more days of anal her asshole got used to it. Now she is an anal whore and is a pro at it.
Her sphincter wasn't in shock. Jesus. Read this and take your time for those people new to anal play: Here is a short tutorial I typed up a while back. It's how *I* learned.. The key to this is to take your time and go slow. You learn how to control your butt and schincter muscles. You learn how to RELAX THEM and you get used to the feeling of it all. Anal play for beginners Disclaimer: I am NOT a doctor and I do NOT play one on TV. This is the way *I* learned how to discover anal play. As usual care needs to be practiced. GO VERY SLOWLY. First start off with a TRIMMED index finger. You may even want to put on a latex glove first to help make it even smoother. Use KY or the drug store brand of KY and lube the finger well. Place it VERY GENTLY near the anus and lightly circle the hole with the finger. DON'T INSERT YET. Just circle it for a few minutes. After a few minutes without insert, just put the finger over the anus and gently press a bit without entering. Just apply a bit of pressure. Do this over and over a few times and after a few minutes SLOWLY begin to insert JUST THE FINGER *TIP* in about a quarter of an inch then take it out. Do this a few times then go a LITTLE further in. Repeat this until you have you whole finger in. DO NOT FORCE IT, IF HE OR SHE OR YOU SAYS STOP, STOP! Within a week or so of trying this the person should be fairly used to the finger and inserting and pumping it in and out should become easy. Also try moving the finger around while inserted, back & forth,etc. Orgasms ARE VERY VERY INTENSE when you leave your finger or butt plug or dildo in. Soon you will want to try something slightly bigger than your finger. Try your middle finger or graduate to a SMALL butt plug. Same rules apply to the new toy as did with the finger. Start off using the finger as usual then after getting loose begin with the plug. Plugs have flared bottoms to prevent them from going all the way in. If you graduate to dildos later get ones with a flared base or ones that have the balls at the bottom. This prevents them from slipping all the way in. You don't need a trip to the ER to retrieve it, that would SUCK! After a while you will become very used to anal play and you won't need much time to prep for your session. You'll loosen up very quickly after you learn how to relax your anal muscles. It takes me less than 5 minutes to go from start to riding a 8 inch silicon dildo like a bucking bronco! GITTYUP LITTLE DOGGIE! The key to learning anal play/sex is to TAKE YOUR TIME.
