afraid to orgasm?

last night I found out my girl had never actually fully orgasmed...ok I was extremely horny, so I started to finger her, like I usually do, but I used some lubricant so she was extremely slippery. so I just started to go in and out really fast, and she started to act like she was going to orgasm, which I never saw her get that intense before. then she stopped me and told me to wait like 10 min. so I was like what wrong? she said nothing...then she was like I never got that excited before, so then she tells me that she always only got like half way to the orgasm point, than she finds a way to make me stop without telling me to, like she would pull away and just suck me or something...now that I think of it she does do that. and also I always wondered why she never acted like how people explain it looks for a chick to orgasm, but I thought that was just how she does it... so now I have 2 questions

1. why doesn't she want to go to that point? I know for me at least that's the best part, like getting there is fun, but the orgasm is like 100 times as good? I was and am her first and only so is that normal for some one to be afraid for the first time?

2. Im worried too bc now that I think of it, she only seems to stop me when I using my finger, never when Im just fucking her no matter how long I go, she never did, so does that mean that shes not being satisfied when Im using my dick?


lol, now it is like a mission of mine to make her orgasm, lol I'm determined to do it...it like I know once I make her she will like it...but that brings up another question:
once she does and feels how good it is, what if my dick doesn't get her to that point, what would I do? but why wouldn't it, like my dick is thicker then my finger, and longer? so shouldn't it be better?

 

It sounds like she may be holding back for some reason. Maybe she has some unresolved issues regarding sex, as in, perhaps she feels guilty? I don't know, just a thought.

Anyway, are you doing any type of clitoral stimulation during intercourse? Would she be opposed to using a vibrator on her "hot spot" to help matters?

Many women cannot orgasm through penetration alone and need some love button rubbing.

 

I don't know why she wouldn't want to orgasm with you... the only two reasons I can think of are maybe she's suffered some abuse previously where she did orgasm even if she didn't want to, or else she's a squirter and is afraid of scaring you off

as for your penis making her orgasm, well, less than a third of women orgasm from just intercourse so dont' worry about it. Fingering feels completely different than gettign fucked - surely a handjob feels different for you than some pussy does. It doesn't mean she's not enjoying herself if she doesn't orgasm, I love intercourse even though it doesn't make me orgasm (what can I say, I'm a clit girl). Thicker and longer doesn't mean you can maniuplate your dick better than your finger bucko

 

I think its more simple than all these explinations, listen or read rather. her g spot isnt being stimulated enough with your dick....its not your size or anything its the motion. let her ride the top more, girls do the grid when there on top, guys just like to go in and out. try leaving it all the way in and push in all different directions while staying fully penetrated, shaking your hips left and right while pointing your dick as far up as you can. when you finger her your hitting the roof of her pussy..........thats where its at my friend. good luck and better fucking to ya.

 

dont know if this may help but i will have a try at an explaination, i have been married to my hubby for the last 21 years, ok we have had some problems lately, bedroom has been a very lonely place, but we are working towards sorting ourselves out. until last week i have never had a single orgasm! been close but never happened! think i was deploying the same tactics as your oh, what with the way i was brought up and other stuff, i was/am stilll very concious of what is happening, bought a rabbit vib well, jessssssssus got no choice now, when it comes out of the drawer, hubby still likes to try a bit of diy on me though, think its more of an ego thing however he is very heavy handed in using it, which has left me a bit battered and sore, but well atleast hes trying!! just got to let him learn, and thats the point learning it doesnt matter what anyone else says as us women are so unpredictable, what works for one doesnt on another. personally, although i love it when my hubby is inside me there isnt a great amount of feeling in there, the only real bit is just at the point of entry, you know, when you are trying and then its tight and then it slides in, bit like when you are putting on a pair of comfy boots you can struggle all you like to get your foot in then suddenly it just goes!


perhaps, and this is only from my experiences lately, once you get her to that point again, do you find yourself doing/saying stuff to encourage her to keep going, i find it rather of putting, as his enhusiasm take over! he starts getting more demanding and instead of me relaxing and going with it i cant get there,, the other thing i have noticed is that if i do my pc muscle about once every two seconds then the feeling seems to build up to where my body takes over and then it works, but dont do anything that could distract her, dont change a thing, unless she says to move to another spot, but dont stop!!!!! think you may have to decide on a totally different word i.e. custard as the signal for stopping as sometimes i feel like saying stop when i dont want to!

good luck from a complete novice whos still trying to kick start her body after such a long drought!

 

is she catholic? i noirs bullshit but way back when in grade school, or sex ed teacher told us that orgasming with another person ispremarital sex... utter bullshit but it may be the case

 

I have the exact same problem your g/f does. And honestly, I'm really not sure why, but it does get too damn intense every time we near the point of no return and I always have to make my boyfriend stop. Maybe you're stimulating her too much, there is such thing as too much pleasure, then it just hurts. Has she ever masturbated? Maybe you should suggest it and suggest she try to reach one on her own so that she can teach you exactly how to do it. My biggest problem is my mind freaks out when I'm on my back and open to the world when I get close. I always have an easier time on my stomach. Though, it makes fingering quite difficult. So, play around with different ideas, and if you just want to get her to orgasm and can swallow your pride, go get yourself a cheap, but decent vibe. So what if you can't manually do it off the bat? Maybe she's just got psychological issues about it and needs something that will send her over the top so that she can get used to you seeing her orgasm. I suppose once we find a method that works, I'll get back to you, lol.

 

hmmm, so what happens if you don't cum, is it not sex? and if you don't need to cum, is touching a dick losing your virginity?

 

i don't really like orgasms, myself. only because it means all the fun is over for me. after an orgasm, i don't want anything to do with touching someone anymore (yea, fucked up but whatever). i try to make sure that he has one before i do because guys tend to hate being left horny far more than girls do (or me, anyway).

you don't really give enough information so i'm just loosely speculating...

 

I'd say she's worried about something. Maybe she's self concious and doesn't want you to see her loose control of herself in such a way...or maybe it's her first time doing something like that and she doesn't want to look stupid in front of you that you might not like...you wouldn't believe the amount of females that are self concious in bed. I'd tell you to make her feel insanely comfortable, loved and beautiful as possible because the closer she feels to you and the more she feels you love her, the easier it might be for her to experience an orgasam with you.

 

if u dont cum then its not premarital sex, or at least thats wut i understood fromm 5th grade sex education... ps, no need to be a dick, i was just posting wut i thought the problem might be and remembered back to 5th grade sex ed...

 

i wasnt trying to be a dick, and my roll eyes comment wasnt directed at you but at the whole premise of touching being premarital sex.

 

oh, well in that case.... RIGHT ON!!!

 

How about talking to her about your concerns? Ask her why she always makes you stop? She will be able to give you better insight into this than any of us will.

 

just a thought here. you know how people talk about female ejaculation - feeling like your gonna pee but then letting go and its not pee its fluid and intense orgasm. it could be possible that this is what you are stimulating in her when you fingered her and she told you to stop because she thought she might urinate... and was silent afterwards and didnt tell you because she was embaressed... well thats my diagsnosis of the situation.

maybe try a different technique or stimulate a different spot...

 

Ask her why she doesn't want to orgasm. She will know why probably better than anyone on this forum.

 

Has she ever had an orgasm? Maybe she needs to please herself first and get aquainted to the sensation.

 

I made your GF cum! If she's telling you that you were her first,...........she's full of shit.

 

Probably becuase you're stimulating her g spot and this is giving her the feeling that she's about to urinate. Have her go pee before hand.

And you can never go wrong with a clit ;-)

 

Ummm MarvlMan, urinateing has nothing to do with that feeling unless you went into bed with a full bladder. If she's having that feeling then she may be about to cum. I know when I reached that spot for the first time it scared me a bit and I held back. I felt something was wrong with me afterwards so I didn't talk to my boy friend about it, I just did research online.