Sing the Batman theme incessantly. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage." Specify that your drive-through order is "to go." Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..." If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. Speak only in a "robot" voice. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub". Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 98 copies. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets. Sniffle incessantly. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles. Name your dog "Dog." Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up." Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think." Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training." Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace". Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot." Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol. Practice making fax and modem noises. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person." Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with the prophesy." Wear a special hip holster for your remote control. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room. Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice. Holler random numbers while someone is counting. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way." Drum on every available surface. Staple papers in the middle of the page. Ask 1-800 operators for dates. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings. Sew anti-theft detector strips into peoples backpacks. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page. Set alarms for random times. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise. Honk and wave to strangers. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies. Wear your pants backwards. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!" ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE. only type in lowercase. dont use any punctuation either Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets. Pay for your dinner with pennies. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes. Repeat everything someone says, as a question. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps. Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J Simpson conspiracy theories. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, its gone now." Light road flares on a birthday cake. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley. Leave tips in Bolivian currency. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador." At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks. When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One." As much as possible, skip rather than walk. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read. Pretend your computer's mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat. Drive half a block. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination. Ask people what gender they are. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes". Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies "Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head. like a parakeet. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September. Change your name to "AaJohn Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a." Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down. Chew on pens that you've borrowed. Wear a LOT of cologne. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing." Sing along at the opera. Mow your lawn with scissors. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!" Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend." Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles." Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture." Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times. Never make eye contact. Never break eye contact.. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results. Make appointments for the 31st of September. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.
Do you have anything you like to do to piss people off. IDK like have really long posts^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^.
so many of those made me lol. i do some of those sometimes, like repeat what people say as questions. and adding a weird tone to the end of sentences to make it sound like i'm about to add more. haha at the beach everyone uses golf carts on the road, and ours is a little faster than everyone elses, so we sometimes don't allow people to pass us when we're high. or when we pass someone we'll stay level with them for like 5 minutes even if they slow down or speed up. that's my favorite thing to do.
hahaha i wasnt going to read them all but im glad i did theirs a lot in there that me or one of my friends have done before lol +rep
or "Fire" Or just sneak one in there. That would be just plain evil, if your "friend" happened to be holding! or, do all three at once, and add some random spelling, like SE. pay your income tax with pennies. I can do this when I'm dosed.
If youre in a office, you take a razor and cut little lines in the tape dispenser. but dont stop there. if they have tape rolls in the drawer slit them too.. stick little pieces of paper in the fan of the computer that will make clickity clickity noise.. bend their scissors.. put black ink in the white out.. if they have a air purifier, put punch out dots in it, when they turn it on it will shoot all them everywhere.. Dots also work really good with umbrellas. :hat: take double sided tape and tape all the books together in the shelf, when they grab one book all the others will fall. or slightly tamper with the pins that hold the shelf up.. tie all the paper clips together.. If there are tools around loosen up their chair, loosen cubical walls.. unplug stuff.. Turn there radio on really loud. most people just hit the power button... tamper with kitchen faucet to spray.. put salt in the coffee maker.. Load porn pics on their computer, set screen saver to play them..
Honking and waving at strangers is one of my favorite things to do ha ha. I love when I am driving in the middle of nowhere and I see someone outside. I'll honk and wave and 9 times out of 10 they will return the gesture. I guarantee it becomes a topic of conversation during the day of them trying to figure out who the hell waved to them.
haha i saw some guy in a fred flinstone costume the other day and i just honked and waved out the window...i think he was advertising for something but i didnt care haha i love to look at other people when im driving though...i dream of the day when i see someone i know and talk to them while im on the highway or something...or meet a hot chick that way haha not mine right
doesn't work at the beach house. everyone waves at everyone. it's a standard gesture. i betcha half the houses down there recognize my face/golf cart. hahaa.
I had a 12 foot trailer some years ago--it was open with a wood floor like gardeners sometimes use with a metal frame in front and a metal flop down door in back. I kept a bowling ball in it along with my work stuff so that when I stopped at a stop sign the ball would roll forward and BANG-into the metal frame--really LOUD!! It was hilarious to watch people jump at the noise!! There was a guy in my home town that glued a coffee cup to the top of his car right over the drivers side. People were always waving and pointing at the cup with frantic looks and he would just look , wave back and keep going!! I heard that after a few months , the cops made him take it down. He had fun while it lasted!!
I laughed so hard reading this thread from start to finish. I have a couple of apps. One generates low sounds to annoy your neighbors. The other is a pitch generator where I could either annoy dogs or humans. I've had to use both in Mexico. It didn't do much, cept maybe some ear damage...
