How men and women shower

something I got in an e-mail that I thought was funny.

How To Shower Like a Woman

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according
to lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband
along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do
more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long
loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
vitamins.
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. Condition your hair
with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes
until red.
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
Rinse conditioner off hair.
Shave armpits and legs. Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet
surfaces in shower.
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap
hair in super absorbent towel.
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

How To Shower Like a Man

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them
in a pile.
Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake
wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits.
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
Pee.
Rinse off and get out of shower.
Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was
hanging out of tub the whole time.
Admire wiener size in mirror again.
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull
off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
Throw wet towel on bed.

If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind
this, there is something so very wrong with you.

 

This is SO SO true! Laughed my ass off.

 

Why DO men shake their weiners at you. It seems universal, Ladies?

 

umm, i dont shower like a woman at all... but i agree with the man part i guess

 

Wow! I haven't had a laugh like that in a long time- thanks Tarabelle.
What can I say about the strange and unusual habits of men and women...
I figure there's got to be a reason the planet has managed to maintain both sexes for so long- even if we do keep each other miserable

 

This is very funny, although, if you are a man, and you pee in the shower, well... thats just a bit to far.

 

That's pretty funny, but not entirely true..

 

The woman part is not at all true for me, as I spend like 5 minutes in the shower and don't use any of that extra crap. But the man part is definitely true for my boyfriend.

 

HAHAHAHA OH MY GOD! i have witnessed this hundreds of times with my ex!

that is some funny shit! i never really paid atention to it until this! now i have it stuck in my head ... which isnt really good, but oh well

 

i saw that on a porn site, nonetheless its funny

 

Well that sounds like I surf porn sites, but I guess someone who e-mails me or my friends does!!!!

 

Why? As long as you hit the drain directly, your not causing any harm...

 

am i the only one that found this not even in the slightest bit funny or true? oh, and yeah, what's the problem with peeing in the shower? even if it hits the bottom it gets washed away. god people are paranoid. piss is sterile!

 

Heheh, very true...

But you might get the bottom of your feet calcified!!! AAHHH!!!


...you people are very paranoid, my whole family sprinkles in the shower--females included.

 

Have to plead guilty after reading that...woo woo!

 

HAHAHA i shower like a man! except for the weiner shaking and hairy soap...
=D

everyone should piss in the shower...just like everyone pisses in oceans or lakes and stuff...

 

I have to say I just love men!!

 

whats wrong with looking at porn? =/ i wasn't criticizin ya or anything, it just looked way familiar...but im glad you shared it. its been a while since ive seen it!

 

Actually, my brother pees in the shower sometimes. No idea why though, it's disgusting.



Edit: My brother is NOT a toddler, he is 34, lol

 

i thought it was funny... man some ppl take things wayyy to seriously..
I shower like a girl, most of the time hahaha.