This all-too-thorny situation is, again, a perfect example of the old saying, ".....stuck between a rock and a hard place......."
I know I've said this before, but, a bi guy who is about to propose to his fiancee, should have, by that time, revealed his true sexuality to his intended. If she REALLY is "the girl of his dreams",she will, of course, be totally accepting. BUT, if she is NOT, well, as the old saying goes, ".....there are plenty of other fish in the sea...." Yes, this certainly could save a LOT of grief, later on.........
I have always been bi and have had a number of encounters with both other men and trans girls over the years, although I have mainly been able to keep it in check during my marriages. My present wife has no clue and my ex only found out after our divorce, when she brought a guy home with her after a night out ( I was babysitting) and the three of us had sex together. I don't want to think what might happen if my present wife ever found out!!
...........If you have been this lucky for all these years, hopefully, it's a good sign for sure that you are still "in the clear" for the long term.......play it safe, don't discount discretion and common sense, and just continue to "have fun", reaping the fruits of "the best of both worlds"........
So sorry to hear that, my friend; at the VERY least, you can say you did enjoy "the best of both worlds", in years past. Stay strong!
"Resilience", I believe, is the key word for married bi men, who are trying to juggle their M2M activities with the wife and family duties.....a tight rope act, for sure..........
Why the word, "resilience?" "Vigilant" seems to be a better word when walking the tightrope. Perhaps plain old "careful" would work. See, somewhere along the line, I realized that trying to deal with my dual sexual activities and like they were two different things was confusing for me so... I stopped thinking about it being two different things and seeing it as the one thing it really was: I needed to get laid and whoever - and whatever - was available would work. Sure, I had to arrange times and dates when pursuing cock but I think once I stopped messing with my own mind about it, making arrangements was easy because I knew what the daily routines were of everyone in the home and... I still had two women at home who I had better have sex with and one more away from home who was a beast in bed - and that's not counting any 'strange' pussy I might come across like the night my wife and her female date invited me to join them in bed. Not all bi married men are so fortunate, but the thing not to do is to overthink or overly complicate being able to do their thing in the dark...
KD23: Another insightful response, as usual. I agree; "vigilant" is indeed the better word, in this scenario.............
IMHO....... A bi married male (especially one that is married) would do well in ALWAYS remaining vigilant, and NEVER letting his guard down.......