My workstation is now OUR workstation

Help me understand why I'm the bad guy here, but I'm sure since I'm the guy I will always be the bad guy.

Back a number of years ago when covid was at its height both me and my wife's jobs set us up work stations to work from home. She set her workstation in the kitchen on the kitchen table. I set mine up in our bedroom on a desk I bought long before I met her. We both worked from home a number of years. Fast forward to now. I've since changed jobs a few times whereas my wife is still with the same company. Some 6 or 7 years ago our kids finally moved out of the house which left us two extra bedrooms. One room we set up for the granddaughters to come spend the night and the other room we pretty much closed the door and that's now our junk room. Anything we don't want to deal with we just stick in there and close the door. A few years ago my wife decided she wanted to take that junk room and make it into her office so she bought a new desk which is still sitting in the box on the floor. Yes, it's been sitting there a few years now because my wife doesn't want to go in that room to clean it out so I can set up the desk. She also wants to get cable set up in there and buy a new TV. Anyway, now there's clothes and a bunch of junk on the box and we can hardly get into the room now.

Last year I started working with a new company and we have a hybrid schedule so I can work from home 1 day a week. Since the desk in our bedroom was so old I decided to purchase a new desk and I bought some new monitors and ordered a docking station for me to use when I work from home. It's a very nice set up with 3 additional external wide screen monitors not to include my company issued laptop. I got everything set up for my workstation the way I wanted. I've been working from home the 1 day a week for a few months now. Yeah, other than that this desk is just sitting here. Again, my wife's company workstation is set up on our kitchen table.

Last week my wife asked me if I thought her company laptop would work on my setup. I told her probably not since we work for different companies and I'm not sure how her laptop is configured. Well, guess what, her laptop connects to my set up. My wife keeps her workstation just like our junk room. It's cluttered with papers, cups, her medicine, pens, etc and I do not want my area looking the same. She refuses to clean up the junk room so we can set that up as her office but now she wants to start connecting her laptop to my workstation set up simply because she says she likes the way I have mine set up. I found out the other day that she did work from my desk and I told her I wasn't really feeling her using my desk when she has been using her set up for a number of years now and that works for her. I have asked her numerous times for us to take a Sat and clean up the spare room but she always has other things to do so since she doesn't worry about it I'm not going to worry about it. My area is nice and clean and I do not want her to start cluttering up my desk simply because (A) she no longer wants to work from the kitchen, (B) she refuses to clean out the junk room so I can set her brand new desk up that she bought several years ago and (C) she refuses to even clean up or straighten up her current workstation. She's had ample opportunity to set up that bedroom but she just won't do it. Now she wants to just take over my area. She only works from home now 2 days a week. She says I'm wrong for not wanting her to use my nice clean area. She thinks that because we're married what's mine is hers but in this situation this is my company's workstation. It's not like I'm just now wanting her to sit in my favorite chair or drink out of my special mug or anything.

Am I wrong here?

 

When I first read the thread title I assumed you were making a big announcement that you had changed your pronouns ...

To answer your question, you're NTA.

 

I think you can help her clear out the extra room. You can get her to help by saying if it's hers and she doesn't grab it, it's going to the dump. You can also have a garage sale.

Then setup the desk and you're done.

 

And I thought setting up our domain and its users was difficult.

 

I've offered to help her clean out the room but she's always busy. But the minute I start throwing stuff away she gets angry. She has clothes from 20 years ago that she will no longer wear or can even get in, but like a lot of women, "I'm going to wear that again" or "that style is going to come back." It's not a priority to her so it's not a priority to me. She wants to use the room, I don't.