A question for married bisexual men

GO, MAN, GO!

 

Dare I interject at this moment:

"ALL HANDS ON DICK!"

 

She was very supportive and our sex life got better

 

ANY married bisexual male who has the FULL support of his spouse in seeking other men for sex is indeed far more fortunate than he realizes.

Far too many are NOT as fortunate, and have the scars to prove it...........

 

Just now thinking of married bisexual men who "come out" to their wives, who, needless to say, have a TOTAL and COMPLETE meltdown, when hubby confesses to her his hidden, secret desires for M2M sex; you cannot help thinking of the wife throwing a major-league explosion and EXPLOSIVE freak-out, a la Lorena Bobbett..............frightening and scary as all hell, for certain........

 

........all the more reason to be VERY cautious about "coming clean", especially if your ("vanilla") wife tends to get "excitable" in certain situations.......NO man wants to have his manhood severed from his torso, again, a la John Bobbett........far too many "domestic disputes" these days can quickly turn VERY ugly, where someone can get hurt............

 

What usually happens is that the husband finds that he doesn't know the woman he married as well as he thought he did. Coming out to her is always problematic because you might not even know if you can talk to her about sexuality things - and you don't know if she won't talk about it because she, too, has something to hide, you know, from her college days. She might go off on you because social and moral norms require her to go off on you. Would she do a Bobbett on her husband? Not if she'd rather not sit in a prison cell for doing it and it'd be hard for a lawyer to defend her because she cut off your dick... because you're telling her that you're bisexual. Not trying to rape her - getting castrated for trying to talk to her.

Which is why a lot of husbands hit the DL to have the man-sex they need and, hopefully, she'll never find out. It is better to beg forgiveness than to get permission, not that she's really gonna forgive you but you stand a better chance of her forgiving - but never forgetting - than you would getting permission to go suck a dick or find a BBC to give you a good reaming out. The funny part in this if/when a guy gets caught or she finds out what he's been doing on the sly - and after ruling out having an affair with a woman is that she's her shit while asking you why you didn't tell her about this and it's like, duh, I didn't tell you because I knew you'd act the way you're acting now but, of course, in her fury, she can't see this or understand that her current behavior is, indeed, a valid reason not to say anything to her about it.

But, as I've been saying for decades, you can be damned if you do and damned if you don't; if you don't tell her and your secret gets out, it could be your ass and not in a good way but, yeah, if you did tell her, it could be your ass. Our morality and social norms in this cannot stand up against that very primal urge and need to have sex - and a lot of married guys are of a mind that it'll be worth it to sleep with a man and even if it's just sucking cock and swallowing cum. Or being sucked off by the other guy and there's no fussing about it. Yeah, you yell out that you're gonna cum and he's not pulling away - but he is grabbing your ass in both hands and shoving you into his mouth as deep as he can get you, so he'll get all that cum you're about to give him.

It's so fucked up that this shit has to happen this way because you should be able to confide in her the things that are a part of you or they're becoming a part of you and it fucking sucks to watch her lose her shit over you telling her the truth of your thoughts and feelings. Saying that things can turn fugly doesn't begin to define it...

 

KD23:

Another excellent, in-depth response.

Indeed, the old, time-honored expression: "all hell breaking lose" seems quite appropriate in this situation, for certain.....and it sure ain't gonna be pretty, that's for damn sure...........

 

It's always been a sad state of affairs for any married bisexual and just thinking about this can be enough to cause a lot of stress within someone because while they can - and will - be okay with this new dual attraction, they can almost be sure that their partner will not be okay and if you think men have it bad, women have it worse but it's our stodgy mindset that makes being married and bisexual such a fucking disaster and for any guy who (a) doesn't have permission or (b) can't bring himself to hit the DL for some guy-on-guy action.

I cannot begin to describe how it feels when the person you love - the person that you married - loses their fucking mind over a truth you needed to share with her. There's some double standard shit going on with this that has never made any sense and as if getting ripped a new asshole by the woman you married wasn't bad enough...

 

KD23:

"Double standards", in all its many forms, SUCKS.

The more you try to rationalize it, the more fucking confusing it gets, and you end up frustrated as hell, going nowhere......

 

Yeah, that's usually the case until the guy being slammed with all this feminine insanity decides to take matters into his own hands. I've known guys who have defied their wife and their vows to her because their need to get some dick is great (that's me being nice about it) and it's now a matter of self-preservation or following Rule #1: Look after your own ass first. This was evident when I was a teen and running into guys who were desperate to (a) have sex and (b) enough to want it with a guy or they were going to go insane. At first, I thought it was just the talk of the frustrated but... not always. Worries about what their family would say, what their other friends would say and really worried that both of those groups would see him as a faggot or queer... but they had to do something.

When I say that I've had guys blow me and as if their life depended on it, I'm not exaggerating; they've gotten me off (and after I got them to calm down so they wouldn't hurt me) and swallowed my cum and they've thanked me for saving their life and, again, I thought they were just talking but I would learn that some guys... took their own lives because they needed to be with a guy but the social and moral stigma was kicking their ass, no one wanted to listen to what was bothering them and, well, yeah. That. Saw "Jerry" in our 6th period class and today, word is that Jerry took his own life because he couldn't resolve the inherent conflict and couldn't cope with the social/moral stigma and angst. I'm stunned to hear the news and, fuck, why didn't he ask me and why didn't notice his distress so I could ask him what was wrong?

You can't save everyone. You can't really talk a guy through what he has to do to be married but craving the touch of a man because if he doesn't know how she is going to respond, there's no way in hell that I'd know that. I know what can happen, both the good and the bad of it and, importantly, I know how this can get guys to overthink all of this and that'll just make this even more confusing and harder to do.
:
And, yes, wind up going nowhere. Now, the choice is yours: Either listen to the dumb shit and let it stifle you and hold you back or you figure out how you can make this happen and decide how badly do you want to do this because, as I say, if it's something you really want to do, you'll find a way to do it.

 

KD23:

That a young kid like "Jerry" resorted to suicide because of these fucked-up, totally full of shit stigmas is truly heartbreaking.....and sickening.........fuck, what is it with some people, those who, sadly, often seem to be in the ultra-majority?

As I said here awhile ago, hatred and bigotry.......of ANY kind......is very much an insidious cancer without a cure.

Yeah, this CAN be one FUCKED-UP world sometimes, for sure..........

 

I've said it time and time again - what's wrong is that we live in a world where some religious stuff is believed more than the things life has been showing us to the contrary. To date, there has been no way to counter those beliefs and, as such, people like "Jerry" decide that life isn't fair and they can't deal with all of this shit any longer. Adults deal with this situation differently; they either suppress their desires and take more than one for the team or... they do something about it. Fantasy is all well and good but there's daydreaming about being in a 69 with a hot stud... and then there's really being in a 69 with a hot stud. Daydreaming about earth-shattering anal sex... or having a huge pipe pumping blast after blast of hot cum to paint your insides.

Probably better to unfuck yourself than to allow yourself to be fucked up...

 

KD23:

Again, well said, and on-the-mark.

NEVER discuss the following with a die-hard "Holy Roller" (or, Bible scholar, for that matter).......

Just how much of the Bible is TRUTH, AND, how much is but FICTION, perhaps based on an incident taken out of context, with much early literary "artistic lisense"?

All I know is (as we have discussed in depth in the past) is just how hypocritical it is to take a book that is SUPPOSED to be "The Book Of God", and used, instead, as a ready weapon of intolerance.........you just have to wonder.........

 

Shit, I'd discuss it with them; I don't fear them at all, and I have no problem asking them the hard questions that life, as I understand it, brings to the table for each and every one of us. How much of it is fiction? Most of it; it's man's way of trying to explain why things are the way they are and the way they're supposed to be - and the reason why science and religion don't get along with each other and religion's self-fulfilling stuff that cannot be proven... or disproved. Take it on faith that it's the truth and... um, yeah, not so much as it turns out.

Shit, I used to invite Jehovah's Witnesses in so I could debate their view of things with them and, yes, to watch them squirm and waffle when I ask them a question and they (a) don't have an answer or (b) I know they're making up one.

 

KD:

Damn, I sure would have LOVED to have been a fly on the wall when you "debated" with the Jehovah's Witnesses!

Something is telling me that they dared not darken your doorstep again, for certain, at least, not the same individuals

You were MORE than a match for these guys!

 

Yeah, they stopped coming around; I'd see them in the neighborhood knocking on everyone's door... except mine. My wife told me, "You're gonna burn in hell for fucking with those people!" and, well, yeah, I knew that I shouldn't mess with them and their faith but when their belief is so different from the one I know of, there are questions that need answers - because this is how you learn things.

 

KD23:

Many years ago, when we still had neighbors we knew, liked, and TRUSTED (sadly, those days are now long, long gone); if one of the neighbors on our street spotted a group of "Jay-Vees" fanning out to "make rounds" and "save souls", "alert" phone calls would be made to neighbors on the block, advising them NOT to answer their doors if someone knocked or rang.

Man, I haven't thought about this in years; indeed, some of the "Jay-Vees" were, shall we say, pretty persistent.....we certainly had no use for them.........