Enigmatic Rhapsody

She greeted me with
sad eyes
and a Mona Lisa smile.
I tell her
"It's raining, better bring an umbrella."
She turns and looks,
with that thousand yard stare,
and a gentle, frayed smile
that tells you more than words ever could...
"That's OK, just bring some soap, I'm used to it by now."
Enigmatic rhapsody in the key of rain.

 

ever so fond of that one,ma!
*kiss*

It's got a good flow.It doesnt take itself too seriously,but just serious enough. I'm a fan

 

I dont know the background of this, but thats what makes it so enjoyable, the mystery, the subtle connotations that seep through and make this vivid and real, like truly a moment from life.

 

I like, but as Kitten above, I don't know.

 

Awesome last line, which pulled it together for me, and leave a few ways I feel like I can interpret it. Lovely, thanks for sharing more of your work!

 

YES. Fantastic linebreaks!

 

it was the last line....in the key of rain.

 

Thank all for your feed back. Wasn't sure about this one. Had a few lines written for months but it refused to come together for a long time. I almost gave up on it.

 

its a beautiful poem. i love the mystery and the use of dialogue. i only might suggest not using "smile" twice, unless of that is part of a point you wanted to drive home...everyone's style is different

 

lol, ack! hadn't noticed...ah well...hmmmmm