In need of a graceful sentence

So I'm doing my university personal statement, which plays a key role in my acceptance. Now there is a particular section where I am suppose to write two examples of when i have assumed a leadership role. Now i tended to the needs of this 5 year old and was a good role model and all that pish posh. Now i can't think of a crisp intelligent sentence to sum that up. I'd appreciate any suggestions, it's quite crucial.

Greatly appreciated! Peace and love

 

Need more info: Were you working as a nanny? Babysitting? Was this a younger sibling you were helping raise?

 

Serving as a role model for *insertname* offered me the chance to not only shape her development but to evolve my own, thus making me more aware of others needs.
that would be appropriatte if it was to a social science department but if it's just for the university in general you would most likely want to emphasize the responsibility part of it rather than the personal growth experience. good luck!

. Now i tended to the needs of this 5 year old and was a good role model and all that pish posh. Now i can't think of a crisp intelligent sentence to sum that up. I'd appreciate any suggestions, it's quite crucial.

 

it was babysitting really. Ther university demands 3 major examples. and this is the last one i oculd htink of. this is much help my mind feel like a lead brick writing up all these statements...

 

nevermind this is a bit better, you should get a book on college application buzz words. I remember community was one of them. I transfered with a 1.9 into a 2.8 minimum school because of my essay.
Serving as a role model for *insertname* offered me a chance to not only shape her development but evolve my own. Being a care provider provided me with a sense of responsiblity;tending to someone elses needs rather than my own has played a role in developing my place within the community.

 

opps I put provide than provider, my synonym finder is in my car):

 

lynsey YOU'RE CLEVER! by jove you've exploded something so simple. that's the quality of a good writer

 

Damn! I want you to write my resume'!

 

You ever had a part-time job? Make up some bullshit about the manager not being there and you having to organise everything on your own, I used a bull shit story like that in an interview before and it worked a treat.

What you looking to do in college anyway?

 

thanks, good luck!

 

I can't even write a 2 page book response right now): geez I'm blocked.

 

You might say:
"I took, a first aid course, so I could help people for when I happen to come upon an accident scene...

One day I turned a corner, to see a huge car crash... and a dozen people all looking, but no one helping the injured people... Obviously they didn't know what to do... I jumped in! delegated one fellow to squeeze a bleeding wound... and another fellow to cover the injured with blankets... and a couple of freaked bikers to cover the dead, and cover the various scattered body parts with green plastic bags... I grabbed three big brusers to help me get the guy out his car that was leaking a lot of fuel... "



Stop there... don't oversell... leave 'em with their imagination very activated... with them off in never never land... And wait, smiling politely, for them to wake up, and invite you to take the post...
Essentially you gave them a little cosmic ogasm... and now they really do need you around... to get more of what they don't have a clue about.. they only know it feels nice.. like when they were sucking mummy's tit...