Revrand Naykid's PastaFarian Sunday school for Pagans

The next chapter in Pasta Farian history was written when st. Alfredo of Marinara made a pilgrimage to the vatican.


Alfredo, then a young monk in training, made the journey with several other young monks to try to share the wonders of "The Hand Of Ja" with the Catholic church.

The Pope and all the CEOs of the Catholic church rejected the herb on the grounds that it would make the populace less violent and less prone to guilt and thus render them much less useful to the corporation (war and penance being the bedrock of their economy), as well as harder to manipulate.

(to be continued)

 

Same Pope as now too!

 

Yes, thier corporate stratagy hasn't changed much in all this time.

 

Hands the reverand a bottle of Whiskey and a cigar, heres my donation.

 

Well, realizing they were in danger, and anxious to find someplace private to burn the sacred herb, Alfredo and the monks went down into the catacombs beneath the vatican.


Some of the monks started to doubt their beliefs reasoning that if the Pope rejected Pasta Farianism perhaps their religion wasn't the way after all.

Alfredo, on the other hand, saw the corporate struture for what it was and quickly packed a bowl to renew the faith of his companions.

Alfredo realized that one of the other monks had inadvertantly copped his lighter so he reached for a torch in the wall of the cavern, plucking it from it's mount.

As soon as he did a section of the wall slid open revealing a hidden room full of icons and ancient scrolls. Taking the nearest scroll Alfredo was amazed to discover it to be a section of the original documentation of the acts of Jahs-Us and the Apot-sles.
(to be continued)

 

Bless you brother Rebel *hands Rebel the sacred Bong*

 

Thankyou for your blessing reverand.

 

Still More amazing was the discovery of several dryed specimans of the Hand Of Ja scattered randomly between the pages of the scrolls.

Then, in a far corner, something gleaming caught Alfredo's eye. As his eyes adjusted to the darkness he beheld before him a bong the likes of which he had never seen before. A strange and luminous precence seemed to eminate from the murky water within, and bubbles rose unbidden as if the Bong were being toked upon by the angels themselves.

Reading the scrolls Alfredo was able to determine that this was, indeed, the very Bong that Jahs-Us and the Apotsles had toked upon at the last munchout.

(to be continued)

 

For some reason Im thinking of reverand bubba flaval from porkys 2

 

A little aside here. According to Pasta Farian beleifs the actual name of the most Chill One was a title he himself chose to signify that Jah is in fact within each of us; Jah-'s(is)-Us.

Jah's-Us

 

Well, from reading the scrolls Alfredo and the other monks came to realise that that corporate church had been lieing to it's followers for centuries.


The real message of Jah's-Us, they discovered, was simply this: Treat everybody the way you want to be treated. Just chill. Don't worry, be happy. Jah will take care of everything but you have to let Him.

Jah's-Us knew that if everyone was happy, everyone would spend all their time trying to make each other happy. Happy people don't go around hurting each other, unhappy people do. Simple as that.

The church, on the other hand, was all about making people as miserable as possible, through guilt, war, fear of eternal damnation, and the oppressive political control of every aspect of the common people's lives.

Miserable people go around making other people miserable so that misery had become the typical state of mankind. Which was the exact oppisite of what the son of Jah was trying to do. And all in Jah's-Us's name.
(to be continued)

 

Well, Alfredo and the monks escaped back to Bongloadia with the scrolls and the Sacred Bong and turned the scrolls over to the now aged, but still happy, Anchovie who dedicated his life to organizing them into the Gospel that bares his name.

Of course, they had to practice their faith in secret for awhile so they continued the habit of mixing the sacred herb with Pasta, spices, and overrpowerringly strong cheeses to mask the odor of the Hand Of Jah.

And thus the Pasta Farian religion was born.


Pasta Farians all over the world believe that the spirit of the Chill embraces all things and should always be held in highest regard because without your chill, you won't be able to enjoy anything else anyway.
"For what does it profit a man if he gain the whole world and lose his chill?"

So, with Jah's-Us and other the sages as our example, we dedicate our lives to maintaining our chill.

To this end we get together whenever we can to honor the spirit of the Chill by eating Italian food, reading from the Pasta-Farian scriptures, and packing the sacred Bong.

 

I'm 23, I have been for years.

 

Thank you brother LotusBlossom *passes sacred Bong*

 

Well, guess that concludes todays service.


Thank you all for coming.

Go, and toke with God.

Hey could somebody bring brownies next time?

 

I think I have a crush on NaykidApe now. :&



I wonder if Jah's-us will bless it??

 

YAY!!!! Just in time for Valentine's Day!!


Come on Karma, lets go see if God's out of the hot tub yet.

 

He better be. If not, we're goin in with him!