Hi Ditto, interesting to read about your experience. I'm curious, you say you felt left out a bit. Was this caused by them playing together, or did you feel rejected by his wife? During your interaction with her, did you get the feeling she wasn't really into you but played along to please her husband? Also, was that jealousy also based on seeing your wife with another man? Did you feel insecure about her liking him more than you or anything like that?
Hey sharing! So I understand that sometimes perception isn’t reality. That being said, I did feel left out. I don’t get the feeling that she isn’t into me. She is always flirting with me, I flirt back. But I will say that her husband is her everything. At that moment where the guy was having sex with my wife and she was making out with him, it felt more like a threesome than a foursome. Now, I think my jealousy is partly because I felt excluded. I don’t think so much insecurity. I know my wife completely loves me, we have a great live together, we have kids. We are highschool sweet hearts. regardless, after talking to all of you that have been awesome, talking this out with my best friends and my wife. I think I am ready to move forward. The last people I have to talk to is the other couple that I will do in about 2 hours. I will take all the advice here, and I told my wife that tonight, we will not do a full swap. We will only do soft to just slow things down.
Ditto and his wife haven't talked with the other couple yet. Caution needs to be expressed here. He has to reveal his feeling of being left out the last get together. Believe me the other couple know something went wrong at the last play time. A 6 year relationship has a lot of familiarity between the partners and possible expectations might be the other couple still has interest deeper than soft. They may be expecting the full swap to restart with all in participation and if it doesn't happen they may break it all off. The other couple will make the choice to abide or pull back. If they are understanding enough though it will work out well. I feel it is too close to play time to bring up the change back from full swap to soft. Discussions should have begun several days ago or better yet right after the issue came up. Then again having 6 years of friendship makes for a better environment and easier discussion. Just remember the other couple has feelings too. Since Ditto left the play area last time there may be some rejection feelings or other concerns and that needs to be addressed. At least asked to know what they felt at the end of the last get together.
Hey everyone just as an update. We met with the couple, we went out for drinks, and talked it all over. Just verified again, what good friends we had, and they all agreed we had moved a bit too fast. We went back home and did soft swaps. I completely felt comfortable. At one point we were both having sex with our wife’s doggy style next to each other and I felt ready to do full swap for a bit, but the other guy was having some difficulty staying hard so I didn’t bring it up. We ended the night with having the other partner bring the other wife to a climax and that was extremely satisfying doing and watching! You were all definitely right, I need to communicate with everyone.
My guess is if you are asking the question, you should probably hold off. Only go with it if each of you have given the matter due thought and are comfortable with it.
We never really had any foursomes go bad. One couple we meet with, told us about their first time, and the other guy was much bigger, and her husband, thought she enjoyed it too much. But if that's the case they should never get into swinging to begin with. He got over it, and they stayed into it.
Recently, we met a younger couple who only wanted to do a soft swap. They communicated their limits and boundaries, and we knew upfront they were very new to all of this. We were nearly 15 years older than them. I guess they saw us as sincere and not pushy. Any ways, As it turns out, we all had a incredibly erotic and sensual time together. One of the best parts was that we debriefed, as a group, for an hour after we were finished. For Ditto12, “Compersion” takes practice. Once learned it is very fulfilling to a relationship
As a example for ditto12, Recently, we met a younger couple who only wanted to do a soft swap. They communicated their limits and boundaries, and we knew upfront they were very new to all of this. We were nearly 15 years older than them. I guess they saw us as sincere and not pushy. Any ways, As it turns out, we all had a incredibly erotic and sensual time together. One of the best parts was that we debriefed, as a group, for an hour after we were finished.
