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Barefoot Soldiers

Discussion in 'Poetry' started by Orsino2, Feb 10, 2005.

  1. Orsino2

    Orsino2 Hip Forums Supporter HipForums Supporter

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    I seem to have fallen

    Amongst the armoir dust,

    As I wonder-- to whom, emporers of the metropolitan

    Bequeathed their armored lust.

    Barefoot soldiers on the sand

    Who am I, where did I land?

    An army of such youthful soul,

    Spare me now or take my whole;

    For I am on my knees,

    Am not begging, seeking rest,

    Finds myself questioning the man at the alter,

    For he is nothing but a mess.

    Politics-- I answer you,

    Something faith does not lie amidst, my fears,

    And quite clearly, seeking, presently,

    I'm ringing in your ears.

    Crossing the bridge's time, it is now revealed,

    How the tyranny of our irresponsibility seems to reign,

    Our prosperity denied, esteem and honor is unsealed,

    And energies of people re-strained.

    Barefoot soldiers amongst the grains of time,

    Time of the essence calls to be a part of my mind,

    Searching for the answer, I seem to have fallen,

    Is this just my sea of madness, or is it something that we're all in?

    Our ship is tended to by the suits,

    Pulling from us, our every root,

    Excuse me sir, won't you show me the way

    Is this path my light of day?

    ©2005 George M. Snow
     
  2. Orsino2

    Orsino2 Hip Forums Supporter HipForums Supporter

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    For some reason, I often have to wonder to myself if people ever read my poems/songs and thought to themselves "What.... the... hell....okay, moving on".... :p :)
     
  3. TrippinBTM

    TrippinBTM Ramblin' Man

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    Man, I hear ya. No one ever really responds to mine, half the time they hardly even get read. It's kind of frustrating, especially when I see people responding to sorta ridiculous poems with "wow, what a great poem" and I just wonder to myself "damn...do I just totally suck at this?"

    Anyways man, I read your poem and liked it. Parts are hard for me to get, but I think I get the gist of it, and I like the imagery and feeling it inspires. :)
     
  4. Orsino2

    Orsino2 Hip Forums Supporter HipForums Supporter

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    Never question poetry. :p :)
     
  5. gdhmomchild

    gdhmomchild Duct tape abuser

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    Who am I, where did I land?

    An army of such youthful soul,

    Spare me now or take my whole;

    For I am on my knees,

    Am not begging, seeking rest,

    Finds myself questioning the man at the alter,

    For he is nothing but a mess.

    Politics-- I answer you
    ______________________________

    My favorite part. Thanks very much
     
  6. dewbee

    dewbee Member

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    yes i liked it too... the barefoot soldiers armed only with beliefs i guess... it is modern and poignantly so.... keep it up... i agree with that! - never question poetry-..
     
  7. lover/young_peace

    lover/young_peace Senior Member

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    I already told you I like this piece. :p And I do. :D

    It ends extremely well. :D
     
  8. Nathan11

    Nathan11 Hip Forums Supporter HipForums Supporter

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    OH!
    So NOW we're getting prejudice against ALIENS?!?
    Sure.
    Ok!
    Pick on them!
    Just 'cause they can't speak ENGLISH!
    lol
     
  9. Orsino2

    Orsino2 Hip Forums Supporter HipForums Supporter

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    Whoever said they would need vocal chords to communicate?
     
  10. moonlightdelerium

    moonlightdelerium Senior Member

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    Georgie Porgie, your poem was vewy vewy gwate :)

    And did I mention, I'm an alien.
     
  11. Nathan11

    Nathan11 Hip Forums Supporter HipForums Supporter

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    It's ok, I wont let BTM get you...
     
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