got gas

ive got really bad gas right now, its 1150 in the morning and my girlfriend is coming over at around 3 and id ont want to still be fartin upa storm when she is over, problem is there is no like pepto or anything to handle this int he house, and my moms car is busted so she took mine and im a huge ways away from any stores!
SHIT

 

Light lots of candles ... . . .

 

hahaha... good thing about being married. having um, stomach problems doesnt matter

 

Forget her, just fart up a storm.

 

try to empty it all out before she gets there

 

she doesnt fart? Maybe shes got gas too and you two can spend a romantic evening having a farting contest.

 

hahaha that would be fun!

 

Go for a run together. That way, you can not only spend time together but you can fart to your heart's content and run away from the scent.

 

How'd your stomach problem go?

 

This sounds like fun, you can bend over and try to set it on fire, see who can blow the biggest flames. Just dont burn down the house.

 

she might not have sex wtih you, gasp!

 

took yours? you dont have a car