Open sex discussion amongst close friends

I was staying at a friends house for a week on business. Catching up and playing games and chilling in the evening. I casually told my best friend and his wife "I heard you guys las night...sounded intense" They were red faced and whet to apologize. I cut them off and said "hey it's natural, I really enjoyed the listen, and I was very busy after "wink". They laughed and changed the subject.
That night was quiet, but the next night...I think they intentionally moved closer to the door which I swear was made of paper that night. I could not see them bet I am pretty sure she was bent over the dresser and he was riding her. After they finished and I think lying on the ground. My friend said "you like that bud?" his wife just started giggling. I replied. We had some fun talks the next morning. And they said knowing I was right at their door listening made them so hot, and for a super pleasurable night. I agreed.

 

I am the original poster for this topic. In my opinion, there absolutely nothing wrong with having a coffee or a social drink and discussing sex with close friends. Having an open sex discussion provides help when needed. Mature older couples can encounter age related or health problems that effect their sex life. Young couples can have problems as well. If we all learn to lay bare our sex life, then we learn from each other. I routinely talk with a lady regarding sex. That’s all it is. Non judgemental constructive talk. Sure beats talking about the weather. Sometimes it can be fun and other times it can be more serious.

 

when my wife was still alive , her and her friend would talk all of the time. They knew each others sex lives better then I think I knew of my own wife's. I honestly don't think that there was one thing that they did not talk about or share. There were times when I would get home from work and they would be sitting at the table and I would hear something like "hey, how is your ingrown hair ? or I heard about last night. Way to go stud" I mean what the heck did you two share all of the time , Sooner or later some of it would come out in general conversation with the three of us. For some reason I was always surprised that " she shared THAT " or " that ". Now I wish those days were back.

 

I chat to my friends about sex

 

Very good Angie. Certainly nothing wrong with a open sex discussion. So many people shy away from it. People just need to open up.

 

That’s so true

 

I was having a really nice open sexual conversation (PM-ing) with a great young lady on here …………… but she ghosted me I guess. She seems to have disappeared. We had - I thought - a really nice connection, too. I miss talking to her. Could it have been a guy posing as a woman???

I believe having open and non-judgmental sexual conversations would benefit lots of people and couples. We can all learn from each other and maybe remove some rumors, fears, myths, & stereotypes. I agree with Panama Jack's post #42 wholeheartedly!! I used to have a few female friends - just friends - that I could talk with about pretty much anything. THAT WAS ULTRA COOL !! Like Jack said - comfortable, constructive talks and sharing info. It's such a shame we're so uptight about a subject we all share - unless one is asexual.

 

I do agree with arrogant, One that helps is to have a SO that is very open to discussing all things sexual. I am very fortunate that my wife is intrigued by the male anatomy. She also is a retired health care professional. Sex talk for us is a easy daily conversation. As we all know, it appears that most couples are sworn to privacy and intimacy regarding sex within their relationship.

 

Oops, I got auto corrected, I meant erofant. Sorry.

 

Panama Jack - Arrogant!!?? How dare you!!!! LOL!! I get the auto-correct. All GOOD. Just a fun bust of your balls.

I wasn't just talking about sexual discussions within a marriage - although as you point out - that usually isn't easy for most couples. Sad in it's own way. But I was talking about informative, helpful & constructive conversations with friends - male and female. We all get here by sexual union, but as a society, we'd sooner talk about our hemorrhoids to friends & neighbors than a warm, reaffirming act of love. How sickening and "eeewwww" would it be to talk to each other about the latter?? <(sarcasm) I've heard numerous, open discussions between 2 people about their hemorrhoids in my life - but have never heard one such discussion about making love to a SO. We humans are sometimes a VERY strange lot.

Wouldn't it be nice to be able to have helpful and constructive conversations between adult women and men about sexual matters. We could learn from each other's real experiences, answer questions, affirm and boost each other's confidence, and share some tips for enhancing our lovemaking when alone with our spouses. How horrible!! Much easier to talk about how bulbous our "roids" are, and which hemorrhoid creams and ointments work best and how to apply them. ( As silly and disgusting as the 'roid conversations sound ………… I've actually heard many such discussions in my life!! ) In mixed company, no less!!!

Why ……………. WHY ………….. then - is sex/lovemaking such an off-putting topic?? What's a more tasteful, desirable topic - lovemaking info …………… or 'roids?? I just don't understand why sexual discussions are treated like the bubonic plague.

 

Something I've noticed the older I'm getting, is how female work colleagues conversations can get very, very "dirty" about their encounters from their nights out on the town, like its just as if hardly anyone is faithful to their partners.
When I hear, and read online, from people who come across as a saint type who religiously promote staying faithful and things, to me it seems to be getting a bogus thing.
There's a woman in my office, late 30's with a boyfriend. Honestly, after seeing her when she's had a drink on a night out she is blatantly not faithful in any way shape or form to her boyfriend, its like why are you even in a relationship if you're opening your legs to almost anyone who smiles at you...

 

Kirstie - I've seen some women of various ages who've acted all "goody-goody" in most circumstances, but in some situations, even with no alcohol - have become pretty flirty, touchy, and sexually aggressive when around other guys. I had young women come on very aggressively to me when I was single even though they had long-term "steady" boyfriends. In my experience, when the mood hits, many ladies ( ladies in the most respectful sense) will just want a guy and there's no stopping her. That doesn't make her trash in MY book, it just means she's human, and she's sexually healthy and alive.

For decades - no centuries! - men who want to "get some" on the side have been championed as "studs", "real men", "guys just being guys", etc. But women who've wanted - or dared - to "get some" have been ridiculed, scorned, shunned, even killed!! Double standard on steroids. What happened to "What's good for the goose is good for the gander."?? "Turn-about is fair play."?? It's hypocrisy - plain and simple. Men can have fun - but ladies can't. If a guy strays, no big deal - but if a woman strays, she's a no-good, dirty whore. WTF??? How is THAT fair & equal treatment??

I get what you're saying, Kirstie. If a lady is wanting many guys, she probably ought to tell her "boyfriend" or husband so he knows what he's dealing with.

 

You are so right with this point. It is even written in Jewish texts of the story of Bathsheba. She lures King David to her bed becoming pregnant. David on the other hand is also married but, WTF, what's one more wife. In religous circles she is scorned but David is revered, as the king. To top it off David sends Bathsheba's original husband, Uriah, to a battle death so they can be married. For the good of Israel of course.

Among men sex talk is kept quiet about how to's and feelings. Who to have sex with and bragging about the numbers or recent escapade is pretty much the extent of the conversation. Among women the talk is more explicit as how to's, experiences. and feelings are shared more openly. When the two sexes come together the talk ceases and is considered to be a subject to be avoided lest the conversation goes from verbal to physical.

 

Sex has become an issue of getting involved into matters which can go between friends,lovers,or a whole internet forum like hipf?
let me give you my 2 cents on this=sex is either between 2 folks or for swingers, and promiscious people..
point is==what do see hippies in this=the Charles Manson attitudes of the roaring sixties which gave a REAL bad name on being hippies?
or do you all see the porn issues here about turning on each other?i don't care a fuck whether you like anal,long dicks or big boobs...
for real hippie folks there is the connection++if you all consider a body or a woman as meat to be discovered
==go for it..and go for your lust/desires and whatever...i think this forum===forgive me to say+++has turned into a sex forum?
as an old hippie with real hippie values...I still go for the real hippe vibes==looking for a better world to live in=
life is not only a pair of boobs or nice legs,my friends,life is about getting to know...that it goes down the drain in a way,is it?
this world is maybe too much turned into a media hype where everyone has become a vamp,a vixen or what else?personal choices,is it not?

i am still OK,you know...but i am often wondering...if you all are still O.K??

 

Some years ago, I was a chaperone on a church retreat. I slept in a cabin with several girls, who ranged from 16 to 18 years old- the older high school group. When they thought I was asleep, they had a slightly furtive but highly explicit discussion about sex and seduction, addressing both the mechanics and emotional aspects. The group included virgins and those who were manifestly not virgins, and didn't mind sharing what they knew. The inexperienced ones were, of course, all ears. Amusing, from the standpoint of maturity, to hear.

 

I just don't - and never will - get the attitudes that sex is filthy, sick, disgusting, perverted, etc. We ALL got here by our parents having sex. If society's attitude is as I've just mentioned ........ what's that say about all of our parents, grandparents, aunts/uncles, etc.???

We can't talk about sex like adults with each other comfortably, either husband & wife, or among close adult friends without feeling "creepy." Societal pickling of our minds. Why can't sex just be a warm, loving, hot, lusty, satisfying interaction between people?? A way to bond with another person??

 

Good comment

 

It can be. I experienced just that yesterday. Met up with a partner and had a wonderful time. Everything was displayed between us. We warmed the room up. Showed love for each other and that morphed into a hot, lustful, and satisfying encounter (fucking like rabbits). We bonded with each other and gave of ourselves to the other for pleasure, fun, and parted happy.

 

Barry -
I was highlighting society's views and reactions to sexuality in general, and lamenting why adults can't treat sex like something positive - instead of the time-worn "filthy, disgusting, perverted, shameful, sick, etc." attitudes. I wonder why 2 couples - close friends - can't have an honest exchange of sexual info for the sake of comparing notes, sharing ideas, helping each other, etc. without feeling "creepy" (due to societal "pickling.") Such conversations could be informative, helpful, and a bit titillating without being tawdry & trashy. Usually the subject of sex only comes up after drinks have been consumed for a bit, and then details and clarity can be lacking. I wish it could be discussed comfortably while sober between 2, 3, or 4 couples.

 

I totally agree with you point Ero. I just wanted to share my experience fleeting as it was. It will stay with me for quite a while though.