Would You Be Mad If A Family Member Pressed Charges On You?

Mmm hmmmm, and I wonder what her side of the story is

 

To OP....Were you really that bad or is your mother mentally ill? i always say...don't hate the person, but hate the illness in a situation, if she is....Did your mother EVER make you feel loved by her?...and do you love her still? If not, distance is key, until you figure it all out for yourself.

 

no I really don't love her. I stopped saying 'I love you,' after she pressed charges on me, and I never have since.

I don't understand the concept of forgiveness without repentance. just doesn't make sense to me.

I have always wanted to end my relationship with her, but I am afraid that if I do she will kill herself. she is really attached.

funny that people mentioned things about having trouble with boyfriends. because my mom remarried when I was about 15 and I used to 'almost' get in to fights with him too. He was a total asshole and has even openly told my aunt that he hates me -- she wouldn't tell me everything she said because it was so bad.

 

I remember discussing stuff with you recently and learning that you are now a devout christian. This confuses me because what you write here is completely against the teachings of jesus regarding forgiveness. Turn the other cheek brother; in your heart, truly. I cannot imagine the pain of such a betrayal, and the lifetime of processing and anguish which it will bestow upon you, but there are no steps to forgiveness; there is only forgiveness. Imagine what darkness filled your mothers mind for her to send her son away to a prison; imagine what anguish is unseen by you inside her heart, as her child attacks her and endangers her life and property. imagine the fortitude it took to send you away like that; imagine also the weakness which underpinned it, and the weakness which paralyses both of you from coming home to each other.



It's pretty clear that if what you believe is true, honoring your mother is extremely important to your god. More important than not killing! It's also the only commandment that comes with its own incentive; "so your days may be long".

I'm sorry for your pain, and her pain.

 

yeah, i would probably be mad if a family member pressed charges on me. that said, there's not enough info for any of us to determine whether your mom was justified to do so.

if you can't even remember if you were sentenced to probation one or two times, i feel like there's reason to suspect you may have had a lot of problems at the time. doesn't necessarily justify mom's actions, but it makes somebody wonder what else was going on.

 

I suspect there’s much more to this story then we’re being told, my guess you were a living terror and the psych ward was exactly where you needed to be at the time.

I understand you’re bitter and angry, but if you could somehow go back in time and see yourself I’m sure you’d understand your mothers reasoning.



hotwater

 

You are years removed from the event - it is time to move on and define yourself on your own terms.

 

You were probably a little emotionally unstable back then. What you needed was psychologist support, not jail time. In this case, your mother obviously took the wrong actions.

But you need to forgive and move on, accept what happened, and make the most out of what you have now. Don't let what she did ruin you, you don't deserve that.

Anyway, to answer the question in the title, there times when it is appropriate to press charges against family.

 

I guess it depends on the transgression, really. If i came at a relative with an axe or tried to set the house on fire itd probably be justified for them to press charges, though i imagine id be pissed anyway. If it was something like stealing from them, or making off with the family car to run away i think pressing charges would be extreme