What are the strangiest objects you have sex with?

I masturbated while having a fish tank water heater in my ass as deep as it went. Also used cucumbers and a maglite 3D

 

I once had to remove tile using a machine that vibrated a wedge under the tile to break it apart. The machine was huge and old.

With my work jeans still on, I laid my cock against the handle and leaned into it as hard as I could. after about 30 seconds of the most erotic vibrating I've ever felt, my cum rocketed into my jeans and I had to go clean up.

wish I owned one of those things...

 

I don't actually use these things (I'm a top) butt, ...

 

Here is my story of a large, old vibrating machine from my sexual history:

Honda​

1973
By early summer of '73 I had hit the road on my Honda 450 motorcycle, touring the countryside, visiting friends and family in 4,000 miles of travels on my metal steed.

After enough time and miles alone together, even a machine becomes close, almost an extension of your own groin. It may have been the pressure and vibrations on my prostate, from sitting so long in the saddle, but one night after miles of deserted hiway and wandering thoughts, I found myself with a very hard cock straining against my jeans. I leaned forward, as bikers do to decrease wind resistance, and put more pressure on my dick between the seat and my leg. With ever so gentle thrusts in the seat, I made love to 400 pounds of hot throbbing steel between my legs at 60 miles per hour down the open road. Having an orgasm on a speeding motorcycle, with the stimulation of wind and oncoming hiway is an exhilarating though possibly dangerous experience.

 

i'm glad you continued this story past the first line; at first i thought it was about how you had to remove a tile from your butt...

 

You know those things cars have for towing trailers - towball.
I have used one for anal use

 

Then you should love this...

 

FUCKING MACHINES!!!!!!!!

 

My hand?

 

WONDERFUL WONDERFUL WONDERFUL FUCKING MACHINES!!!! EXCITED IS A HUGE understatement!!!!

 

I MUST HAVE THE T W I N S T E R!!!! nothing STRANGE ABOUT THAT OBJECT S!!!

 

I MUST HAVE THE T W I N S T E R!!!! nothing STRANGE ABOUT THAT OBJECT S!!!