Realizing Your Buddy/house Splitter Is Stealing Food..

If your buddy asked you first, before just taking your food, would you have said sure.....
Was it the act of disrespect for you, or is money tight for you to buy food for yourself?

 

this is why roommates are a bad idea. 99.99999999% of people are scumbags.

 

I've only had roommates a couple of times years ago and neither situation went as well as I hoped it would.

 

If he asked me for help, I wouldn't at all anymore for the plain fact that he hasn't done anything to help himself in a year! And he knew the time would come when his EI gets cut off, and that the rent's going to be owed. I don't understand how his reasoning works to make it wait longer and longer..

If I seen him make some sort of effort into finding a job I would of helped him a bit sure, I have before when he had work.. but I know how he is after 3 years of relying on his rent and it being late well over 60% of the time! I don't pity him anymore, I would just think he'd have enough sense to do something by now, it's like he thinks it's all going to just come to him somehow without needing to do anything.

He used to get EI for a year remember, and in the winter when he first got laid off, it was "too cold to look for work, I'll wait til warmer weather comes"... then in the summer it was "too hot to go out i'll wait and get bit more out of the unemployment".... now it's cut off and he has no money for bus to go look for jobs, his phone cut off so he sometimes asks me to use mine...

And any bit of money he got from his EI in the last year that was for himself, he would make the rent late, and buy blow with it and never use it for anything useful or buy himself much food. So he wasted the bit he had to help himself on nothing and now he's ltrying to bug another buddy for a load of 40$ or whatever to get busses etc. to look for a job. NOW.. after having a year off to look for work!

I wouldn't steal his food even if i had nothing, but that's further impossible because he don't ever have anything of his own down there. I don't know how someone could stay sane doing nothing for a year, and just living off a few dollars to spare and blow it all on blow or take out

---

I didn't get to talk to him last night cause he was gone when I knocked .. and yesterday before I realized the nuggets thing, I had offered to drive him to a place to ask about work that could be promising but instead of that i'm going to wait to see him after to ask him what's the deal.

The reason I don't have roommates is sort of for these reasons, I work hard for what I have and I'm not rich, I don't got all kinds of money to spare. This food isn't breaking my bank but that shouldn't even matter. Just cause I work, and he's too lazy don't make it any more acceptable to pick the lock of my door, steal food and try to cover it up as nothing's wrong.

I don't know what his reaction will be when i confront him, but there's no other explination. If it was someone other than him, i'm sure my guitars and music gear and all my other stuff that's worth money would be gone as well. But it's jsut enough to not notice until you look.


Did I mention the fact that he's in his mid-50's and i'm 28? Someone living on their own that long still can't hold their shit together and have to resort to stealing from people who help and trust him rather than just work for what he needs.

 

It's a good idea, but i'm sure he already thinks i'm too dumb or whatever to realize..
I don't want to act more dumb about the whole thing. I know what's going on, and regardless if he'll admit or not he knows so I rather him know that I know.

I used to put a string thing across the door hanging before, and oddly enough everytime I did that nothing ever happened. This was soon after the first few times though, and I stopped doing it everytime I left after a while but it's like he took a break for a while and is at it again cause he got away with it a few times before.

 

Sounds to me like he's going to have a serious condition soon. A condition called homelessness.

 

I take back my previous posts. Just tell him to hit the road. It doesn't sound like he wants to do any thing more than what he absolutely has to do to survive. I have a couple of friends like this and our circle of friends has realized that they do much better when we do nothing to help them. They will still do what they have to do to survive but those things become more on them and less on the rest of us.

 

Ipecac.

 

I've never had a roommate, and I'm glad I haven't.

 

You should steal his non-food shit, and hide it silly ways.

Replace his armchair with a cardboard one, replace his car wheels with pieces of paper with tires drawn on them... post results.

 

The first time I had roommates, they were married friends of mine. She was the nicest girl and I had no idea what a complete abusive asshole he was to her until I lived with them. I was there and I know she did nothing at all to provoke him or deserve what he did to her. I had to step in numerous times to get him to leave her alone. I couldn't take that so I moved.

The second time I had roommates....they were a couple and I was simply renting a room from them. I was rarely there, almost never actually hung out with them, never ate a meal or dirtied anything outside my room. It was a place to keep my stuff and sleep at when I was there. One day the kitchen was trashed. There were huge piles of dirty dishes, uneaten food, etc, all over. I got there and they were like "Hey man, it's your turn to clean the kitchen and living room" (which was also trashed). Yeah....I don't think so. I would have done it if I even contributed slightly to their filth...but I didn't and things went south from there.

 

That sounds awful, wiz!

 

Take some Hershy bars and break the little squares up and mix chocolate ex-lax squares in with 'em in a dish where he can find them. Observe the fun!


I actually feel kind of sorry for the old sucker. It's pretty bad to be that age and have no desire to help himself whatsoever.

 

Yeah it's a house, detached.. a fairly small bungalo house. There used to be a basement apt and the top part, but the landlord gave it to me (who was three of us at the beginning) as just one price, I can do what I want. So buddy gives me his rent normally, and I deal with everything.

He has a small kitchen down there, but he is someone who i visisted for years at his old place over the years, and never used the stove etc. He ordered out like 3/4 nights a week and that's it.

As much as I feel bad for him and that he's at the age now he just doesn't want to give a fuck anymore.. but I worked my ass off to be able to support myself this way and it's only recently i'm able to fully and able to save something instead of everything and more going towards just living!

I've given him breaks before, he even pays 100$ less than originally planned and I cover 100% of the bills...
but it seems giving him that break gave him reason to try less to cover even the small amount of 500$ to live.

I put a better lock on the door, there's no way he could "pick" it now. He's seen it i'm sure and the fact that i've been avoiding him, he knows I know now. I'm just waiting another week or so, when the deadline hits. If he has nothing then he'll be on the way out. If he somehow gets some cash to help him out then we'll go from there.

I can afford to keep the house at this point all on my own.. and I'm willing to pay it for a month oro two to clean the basement up and find someone good to live there... but I know if I pay it a month while he's here then he'll fiend off that and I'll never see it back.

 

I hope this doesn't happen to you... But some places in the US have a law stating that once someone changes their address to your house (apartment, whatever) you can't just boot them out. You need to go through the whole eviction process which can take 3 months or more, and costs money. I had a guy try to pull this on me several years ago.

 

So how is the situation between you and your house-mate? Did he try to break into your apartment and steal your food again or is the new lock enough to keep him away? What about the rent? Or maybe he is finally gone and you can breath freely and find some decent to live with?

 

I had a step-brother like this. I stopped buying any sort of food. Since I already knew he'd steal, I never left money around. I took him in as a favor and he was always late with rent. If I had thrown him out, I would probably still be hearing about it 20 years later. Eventually he found another sucker and moved on. I think people like that know damned well what they are doing and are good at making it seem like they are hopeless when all they are doing is sponging.