Is a year too long to ask someone out?

I've known this girl for about a year now. I don't know her that well, she actually works near my work. When I first met her...a year ago!...I felt attraction from her... She acted giddy and smiled a lot and complemented me...but I had a girlfriend at the time and I was sort of blinded by all of this. A few months later I stop by her work for something..and she's there and she again shows me signs that she likes me. I remember being really nice to her, but I again don't give her much of a response...in fact, I think I even rationalized in my head the fact that since I had a girlfriend, it would be wrong to flirt back with this girl..

So a few more months go by and by then I'd probably seen this girl 6 or 7 times, either in her work or around our work (we work in the same mall)...everytime there's something. Either we look at each other or she'll smile at me randomly. It's pretty subtle but still...feels like something's there...

So maybe 2 or 3 more months go by..and it's now October I think....and suddenly (and seriously...within the blink of an eye) I'm overwhelmed with feelings for this girl. It's like a love spell was cast on me...I remember seeing her walk past me while I was on my break, we just briefly looked at each other and that was it...for some reason that triggered something in me. I don't know why it took so long. It's actually reeeaally frustrating because I had a clear window of opportunity months and months ago, and now it feels late and even awkward to ask her out. It's just been such a long time...

I tried walking into her work to ask her out a couple weeks ago but my nerves got the best of me and I ended up asking her a bunch of boring questions. Also, she didn't act as excited as she used to, which makes complete sense...it's been almost a year! The sad thing is, I was so calm and collected before, and now I'm kind of nervous. Also, asking her out seems slightly "out of the blue"

Anyone have any feedback/advice for me? It would be great to hear what any girls out there think

Note: I'm no longer with my girlfriend at the time

 

a year would be too long if you were in regular contact. if you only see her once a month or so for a couple minutes at a time, i'd say it's not necessarily too late. although the fact that she doesn't seem interested anymore could mean that it's too late for other reasons, like she's no longer available or something.

 

its never too late

 

People get together after years or decades of first knowing each other. In your case it is possible that she is now involved with someone else or maybe she just got tired of you not reciprocating her interest in you.

Calm yourself down and ask her out or ask her if she wants to get a coffee or something. What have you got to lose? The fact that you did not flirt earlier because you had a girlfriend would only show you as an upstanding individual.

 

I've got the same problem. There is this really really attractive girl that would always flirt with me around a year ago, but I was always too shy to reciprocate (even though I would give anything for one night with her!) and another girl who would go as far as texting me that she was horny, but I was always too shy. Now I have built up enough confidence that I think I could get them, but I think the moment has passed somehow :/

 

A bit cliche, but it's true.

 

Man what you need too do is go and talk too that girl! Be friend first! Have lunch with her.

 

Why should anything *ever* be too late?
(I mean unless they've died or something..)

As an example, I first started talking to a girl not that long ago. Now normally I'm all *very* flirtatious and joking around girls, whether I think they're hot or not. But at this time, I'd had recent bereavement, so I didn't flirt once.

However, I did (and still do)really enjoy talking to her. And it was mainly about serious stuff, and ofcourse my low state of mind meant I didnt feel at all like flirting with anyone in the World.

Anyways, time's passed by, and this girl is really cool and hot. And someone I really enjoy spending my time talking to. Lots of things in common etc etc .
Infact, she'd be a terrific person to date- as in potential girlfriend or whatever..

So should I say "friends only" forever because I'm already friends? I'd say certainly not.

I still dont really feel like my old flirtatious self. But, I have to say, nothing is *ever* too late..

Good luck with what u choose!

 

Wow I didn't expect so many replies! Thanks for the feedback everyone. Sometimes I get caught up in my own thoughts and need some outside perspective. This seriously helps! I'm definitely going to talk to her again and if it feels right, I'll ask her out!

Thank you

 

Heath took 5 years to ask a girl out! And she said yes (well technically she asked me out but anyway)! Close to the best 4 months of my life, so do it!

 

of course not. she most likely already did for you.

 

how u mean? she most likely thought she'd like to date me?
(sorry I'm tired and my brain ain't working lol)

BTW *serious* dating is complicated. I mean girls talk about if allllllllllll day long.
I feel like my (ie male) brain doesnt understand serious dating. Casual dating is a different .. world.

 

no, i mean she most likely said "friends forever" because you're already friends.

 

Stop over analyzing things and just freakin do it. Put yourself out there, take risks.

Live life, man

 

First off get rid of the nerves, just ask her out. If she asks why you didn't ask her out on earlier encounters be honest, say you had a girlfriend at the time and you were not about to cheat, if she's worth anything to you she should respect that.

 

My advice is: Ask her out. I know it can be hard to do after so long time, but there is only two possibilitier. You can get a yes or you can get a no.

 

i agree with wiggyman

 

how do you not close the deal when she texts you that she's horny? that is not so subtle code for 'i want your dick'

 

good you are open to suggestions,
Well definitely its not too long, but i think now you must ask her, before its too late.

 

nigga its too late! move on