Girls, is your current Husband/boyfriend your best ever lover. And.......

It is extremely rare that any man would turn over his wife to another to keep her sexually satisfied. In fact, most men that have a lady with that kind of sex drive, would thank the gods in heaven they got so lucky. If he gives oral until is tongue is paralized, and pounds her for 2 hours until his penis is pickled, and she still isn't happy, what is a man to do? Or what is a woman to do? Does it justify ending a marriage that is good in every other way?

 

Who says he's sharing his wife just to keep her? Maybe the situation gets both of them off and they enjoy the sharing while it's happening.

.."but don't find someone who shares a wide range of sexual kinks with you that might involve engaging in an open relationship, that's for depraved diseased people!"

It seems you're zeroing in on the wife sharing type couples, do you share the same animosity for swingers? What about couples who are a little more on the poly side and don't think love should be devoted to just one person? What about the couples where, sexually, the woman is a bit of a domme and the guy is a bit more sub and they involve other people in their sex lives to play into that (eg. cuckoldry)?

 

If I was with someone and gave them oral untill my tongue was paralized and pounded her till my penis was pickled and they still went outside of the relationship to get more then yes I would feel justified to end the relationship!

If I was with someone and had a great sex life, mutual respect,trust and great communication on the other hand I would have no problem with bringing others into our play time on equal terms.

 

You can't say we didn't try

Which is why I was interested to hear Jaco's perspective on the matter, so I could better understand his mindset. But rather than share his perspective on the matter, he and Rachel felt compelled to try and launch a personal attack against me and FX for being the ones to question them .

Can't speak for everyone but I'd say this is how most sensible people would feel.

 

what woman would want to be in that relationship?

So love is S&M, bondage and multiple partners?

I know my views are rigid, narrow, overly romantic and perhaps, old fashioned but I am not changing them, not bowing to pressure. To me marriage is sacred and when two people join together and remain faithful to each other they grow together as one being. Hard to do that while your wife is getting fucked in the ass by a stranger.

I have a powerful sex drive just like I have a powerful appetite. There was a time early in our marriage where I could have fucked 3 or 4 different women every day, just like there was a time when I could have eaten 2 t-bone steak dinners, a bottle of wine and still had room for an entire cherry cheesecake. It would be easy for me to be faithful if I had a low sex drive. By being faithful, despite my desires I am showing more committment, more control, more devotion.

 

So someone who has a low libido or little interest in sex is a loser??? Your quite clearly an idiot! Why do you have a boyfriend? Don't give me your bullshit about a bit of fun or adventure. You can swing it anyway you want to, but you want to have sex with another man, other than your husband! Is he a loser?

I'm not surprised! Your the sort of person that has an open relationship, but then calls others out for having the same, and all because it is not exactly the same as yours. No wonder other woman have zero respect for you!*

On the contrary, it is I that is done with you. Hypocrite!

 

Well aren't you the pot calling the kettle black. :smilielol5:

 

You are calling her a hypocrite when you have stated you would take on another lover on the side if you were allowed to, but would never be okay with it the other way around!

 

I see what you did there. You take one bit and then assert something I wasn't even saying rather than addressing the whole of my post. That's fine, it's what you do when your arguments have been weak as hell.

Honestly, after seeing you constantly need to build yourself up, the people who are involved in these kind of arrangements seem to be much more secure in their relationships (and possibly themselves) than you are in your own. These people can see their spouse or significant other with someone else and still have as much love for each other as anyone else. They're free from jealousy, insecurities, control and so on. But you.. You said in an earlier post that your wife would cease to be your wife if she were to socialize with another man. Throw in how you "demand accountability" this, "won't tolerate" that. What the fuck? That isn't a sign of love or devotion, it's a sign of control and insecurity. Your incessant need to build yourself up as some sort of ultra stud who could have fucked a mall full of women and ate a mountain of food, but didn't because you're incredibly devoted to your wife and she looks up to you as if you're a God.. It's like.. I can't help but wonder if you have ever heard the phrase "thou dost protest too much"? Because it fits you like a glove.

It's just insulting in general that you insist that two people, two consenting adults, who enjoy involving others in their sex lives are any less loving than you and your wife or any other monogamous couple, regardless of whatever strict-ass standards of love you feel like pressing upon other people.

If Husband A and Wife A feel like swinging with Couple B, who cares? It's just sex.
If Husband A gets turned on by the thought of Wife A being with another guy and the wife is game and turned on by it as well, who cares? It's just sex.

Sex toys, dressing up, roleplay, S&M, including others in their sex lives, etc. Whichever they would choose to do, it's just a way that couples enhance or stimulate their sex lives. From the accounts I've read along the internet by men and women involved in these type of relationships, it has little baring at all on whether or not they love each other or how much. And in a lot of cases, it's helped them grow as couples. It's about spicing up their sex lives, it's about adding a little variety, it's about having fun and there is absolutely nothing wrong with any of it.

 

She must think you're "dim" too. Apparently we're all stupid for being able to see what she cannot.

 

Well, lets see...........because they live together, they are a family, they are best friends, they love each other. Is that really that difficult to understand you big dope.:2thumbsup: Talking to you is like talking to a complete dick. Do you know why that is XXARU? Because you are a complete dick.

 

If a guy needs more or better sex than what his girl can give, and she is fine with him getting it elsewhere...........Where's the problem? I would think it was cute. To be that honest and loving with each other.

Just because you would not be cool with the situation that Jacob is in, does not mean that he isn't. He is obviously very happy in his relationship. Why do you have a problem with that? In fact, He seems to be the only happy Man in this thread, and I bet he's getting more sex than you, xxaru (A.K.A Number 1)
and fx207 combined.

No, what I said was......I would not take a lover because I could not stand the thought of my Man being with another girl, and that would make me feel like a hypocrite, and that is why I don't think an open relationship would suit me, no matter how cute I think it is!

 

I just love how you're able to say that with a smile on your face. You're really making yourself look good here. Keep it up!

Doesn’t matter how much sex they’re having if he can't satisfy her now does it?

Lol, you already are a hypocrite. You can’t go around praising and reinforcing sexual behavior that you would never engage in yourself, and not be seen as hypocritical!! If it was so great, and so perfect, and so beautiful, then you’d be doing it yourself. But you’re not. Like I said… hypocrite!

 

Yes, she can.

And not necessarily. What is it with some of you claiming others are hypocrites, then using shitty reasoning to back it up? I admire the fuck out of the astronauts at NASA who go into space and risk their lives for discovery. It's awesome. I would never attempt to do it myself for various reasons, but that doesn't make me a hypocrite.

If she and her guy were to speak down about it publicly and trash open relationship stuff, but turn around and do it behind closed doors, that'd be hypocrisy.

 

It’s also hypocrisy when you reverse it. It goes both ways. Call it reverse hypocrisy if you want to. I really don't care.

 

Whichever way you want to paint it, it's ridiculous to slag her using the term. It's not like her admiring these couples is something negative.

 

Whether her admiration is seen as something negative (or not) is dependent on the person looking in. But whether you like it or not, she is a hypocrite by the very definition of the term.

 

Okay Rachel85 when I read this it sounded to me like you would be just fine with a relatiomship where you were aloud to have another partner as long as your man did not have one! If I thought that he would be ok with it, I would love to try it is what you said. I guess i just don`t read clearly, because I am just thick or stupid like so many others are to you in this thread.

 

First of all I never said anything negative about the way Jacob choices to live his life! I said that he is a cuckloid and that is his call. No I would not live my life like that and my lady would not want to be with me if I was that kind of man. Just for the record though I am a very happy man in an amazing relationship with a great sex life. I am a confident giving lover that does not lack a penis or have a low attention span. I am also smart enough to know that it takes both people involved in the sex to make it top notch. Luckly the lady I am with gets it and makes it as good as it is.

 

Okay I'll level with you here.

While I get your argument, my counter argument is that I think cuckolds, don't associate the concept of respect with sexual exclusivity. Rather they associate it with consent, so it is like a social-business contract.

One could argue that Jacob, isn't a loser because he can easily just as say the arrangement needs to come to an end and stand his ground. The arrangement in of itself doesn't mean any respect/power-balance or whatever was lost at all.

I also suspect that another motivation why cuckolds don't mind is they probably like the idea of knowing their partner is being pushed to their limit and beyond.

Cheating is seen as something entirely different due to the fact that it is done in secret and without consent.

---

I have to ask is your idea of marriage and it's sacredness coming from Judeo-Christian values?

Because if they do I NEED to point out that God had no trouble with his Old Testament prophets having more than one wife, or even concubines, provided no adultery was taking place (David and Bathsheba for example).

So that throws out the monogamy argument out the door using scripture alone.

The idea for monogamy only, came from the Roman Empire's law, and we all know what fate God gave that society/empire.