Hi guys! Basically I have been with my girlfriend for 6 months, things with us are absolutely fantastic, I see her pretty much every day and we spend at least 3/4 nights a week together. We are both in love and it's evident that this isn't going to change between us. The only thing that isn't that great is the sex - she has always told me that she is incredibly hard to make orgasm and that the only person that was able to do it with was her ex boyfriend - I've made her orgasm twice, once during normal sex and once when we introduced her vibrator - the issue is that I have a fairly small penis and because of this and her difficulty with orgasming she said she can't really feel that much which makes me even more sexually insecure, which doesn't help things. Anyway I was worrying about it last night and she told me that the sex really doesn't matter to her and that as long as she pleases me then that's fine and as long as she has sex she isn't bothered. She then told me that she's worried because she knows the sex in my previous relationship was good so she thinks I'll end up just sleeping with my ex in order to compensate - I told that definitely wouldn't happen and that she is the only person I want but also told her that I worry about her doing the same with her ex. With my ex the relationship was terrible so I always felt I had to compensate by having as much sex as we could, and because of this the sex was great - the same goes for her ex boyfriend really. We usually have sex roughly once a week. Sometimes because Im worrying about it so much I struggle to get an erection which is so unlike me because I'm usually a very sexual person, as is she. I guess I'm just looking for a bit of advice on anything I can do to try and make things better - it just bugs me because our relationship is so fantastic and it's just this one little thing that's really winding me up and playing on my mind. Any tips or help anyone can offer would be great. Thanks in advance everyone.
Many people find them selves in the same situation like yours but the truth is size of your penis may not matter if says that it is okay as long as it erects. but how you use it the question. I think you should try many styles but when you are not looking for your own satisfaction but only for hers. If you try to make her like what you in sex, she will forget her x and i think she will try to satisfy you too but don't push that just focus on making her like your sex
Try to relax and enjoy...maybe try different positions that give the most penetration. It sounds like both of you are insecure about previous lovers coming between you. You can look at it this way...at least you are both together in that too
Thanks everyone. I broached the subject of oral sex but she said that she isn't a massive fan of having people go down on her - but she might just be saying that because I told her I wasn't a huge fan of doing it. The truth is though that I am willing to try anything at all to make it better - it's such a stupid thing because we are both very sexually active and I've always enjoyed sex, I just think the problem is that we haven't experimented properly with each other. Can sex sometimes take a lot longer with someone before it gets better? Thanks everyone.
You have to look at it a different way....fresh territory to explore. Try oral, kissing all over her body...breasts stomach legs, inside of knees...work your way around her body. By the time you get to her genitals, she should be wanting you to go there quick, but make it take a little time. Exploration is a way to start anew. Don't be afraid to do anything that might stimulate her...I would stay away from anal, except maybe a finger when it gets real close...some women like that to push them over the edge, some don't...everyone is different, they all like different things.
It can take longer and longer, the thing is that maybe everyone is nerves about sex that can be the reason why isn't getting any better. try to work on that a little bit and see where it will take you.
Give her oral sex and lots of it. The size of your unit is not going to matter so much if you become an expert at using your tongue and mouth. If she says she doesn't like it I can only assume she has never had anyone spend the time to learn how to do it well with her. Be that guy. Don't just go down there and give her a couple licks and be done with it either. Spend alot of time there finding the spots that really get her going and just keep going at it. Like anything in life practice makes better. You get good at this and your sex life can only get better.
Look up positions specifically for deeper penetration if length is the problem here. You could get a cock ring. You won't feel so bad because it's not like you're using a "replacement penis" (the vibrator) and she'll be feeling it every time you thrust. Also, lots and lots of foreplay. Tease her until she can't take it.
I think you guys need to stop letting your past mess up your relationship. If you have these kind of hang ups it can only be a bad thing. There are so many ways to satisfy a lady other than penetration. Play with each other and learn all about sex again with each other. As long as you are mindful of the others needs you will be fine.
