how do u get into being a swinger

I'm only 18 but I just know not just one woman will ever keep me content I love the thirll of chasing after the first kiss or even better the one night u get with the lady you have been keeping a secret from your gf

 

you don't "just know" anything when you're 18.

 

swingers dot your location dot google ...

 

To me, swingers still operate under gender norms. Women are put on pedestals, pay less entry into swing clubs, wear wedding rings, and seem to be emotionally/financially dependent on their husbands. As a single man, I felt I was basically denied entry.

The ironic thing is that I have seen swingers be very hypocritical toward prostitution, and yet, this is what a single man who pays upwards of $160 just to get in at these clubs is likely to fuck. Only it`ll cost him more than the husbands who walk in there to fuck the same hooker.

I want something more progressive than that. I am trying to create my own open relationship/polyamory group here where I live. There are still poly nuts who emphasize marriage, but I got one woman interested in meetings so far, and best of all she`s single by choice.

I am going after people who are single or in a secular open relationship. If you`re married, you`re out. Living in separate households is preferred. It seems to be the only way to really meet people. I figure instead of complaining my scene doesn`t exist, I`ll try to rock it myself.

 

Thats cheating not swinging, swinging she knows and it's not a secret.

 

Yes, I do.

This is not to say the female half wants to get fucked by as many dicks as possible any less than the male half wants to fuck as much pussy as possible. It`s just that the husbands appear to take on the active role.

It still seems like swingers need the ring, the arm candy, and the wining and dining in order to have sex. I want sex without those. By simply building relationships unfettered by superstition and symbolism.

They don`t call me raw dawg for nuttin`.

 

Wow some times I wonder what why I post these things and then I read what's above and there it is .... It would be nice to just find a girl and tell her that I really like her but at the same time be abble to be with who I please not just her all the time it makes me feel traped in a cage and I just want to break out at night I do some nights .. But I'd like to just have the key to the door come and go as I please but always come home to the girl I love after a night or two out with my lover

 

I wasn't always the female half of a swinging couple. I met bf on a sex site and due to our high sex drives, our relationship gravitated toward swinging.

I admit, swinging seems to be dominated by "couples". It does seem unfair that single men have to pay more for their drinks in a bar and more to attend swinger clubs.

Cherea, i wish you good fortune in your endeavors to bring swinging singles together.

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I suggest being black and having a big dick...just saying.

 

...aaaanddd I'm sure it doesn't hurt to have a bod like Renogirl's, either....

 

Awwwwwwwww thanks hgoodmans :blush5:

 

If your situation is: having a girlfriend who wants you exclusively and you want to play the field, you may have some tough choices ahead.

It is very hard for most guys to cheat on a girlfriend and her not eventually find out. The ability of a woman to read your body language and face is uncanny. Might as well either come out with it or break up with her.

Never mind about what you may be doing sexually in 20 or 30 years. It is your life right now that matters.

Run the various scenarios through your mind:

1. Tell her you still want to see her, but not exclusively and see how she reacts. She will either:
A. Break up with you just for making such a suggestion
B. Get upset but keep you if you agree to drop the idea
C. She may agree to it. Just keep in mind that you may no longer be her main squeeze, just her spare date when her new main boyfriend is out of town.

2. If you know she would never go for it, you could just break up with no drama and just start hitting the dance clubs or whereever singles go in your territory. There are plenty of men and women looking for a quick hook-up, no strings.

3. Find a way to get more sexual and emotional charge from the relationship you already have. Maybe something as dumb as her wearing a blonde wig to bed some night (if she's a brunette), but more likely it will involve simultaneously allowing more time for your individual hobbies (healthy space)AND breaking out of the routine when you do get together with her. Maybe watching videos on the couch and having the same old sex later would get stale with anyone. Travel together, do new activities.

 

Try reading the ethical slut and doing some google searche for polyamory. The weird thing about swinging is the lack of relationships. Just make sure you find a girl who isn't the jealous type. Also, you need to be okay with her going off and fucking other guys

 

I just went to a swingers club one night, got free membership and tired it out. They're usually pretty relaxed, safe, and fun places.

 

The swinging scene is great, people should be more sexually open and comfortable with engaging in a natural and wonderful activity with friends freely. A prerequisite to swinging is a serious relationship however, which at 18 you cannot have. Just stay single until you and your prospective partners can add the degree of complexity to your relationship. Aside from that, you just described cheating.

 

get a Tarzan outfit..

 

As long as you are both aware of what's going on, and she has the same rights and privileges as you do, go for it. But I'll bet your opinion changes when you "come home to the girl you love" and find her in a foursome with 3 strange men. And you're not invited to play.

Just saying, view it from her perspective before you decide things.

 

It doesn't sound like you want to be a swinger but to be in an open relationship.
Either way Id suggest just telling whoever your with how you feel. Either they'll leave and you'll end up having to find someone who is ok with you being you, or they'll be into it and you'll both bet happy. Either way your better off.
Ive had some strange arrangements but as long as everyone was ok and honest about them they worked.

 

would like ot find easy way as well

 

Dude, that`s such a callous, stereotypical portrait of an open relationship in a world full of monogamous prejudice already; and, it does a disservice to us who have been in open relationships and enjoy them.

Open relationships do not mean that you`re suddenly going to be confronted with your partner having an orgy in front of your very eyes. It does not mean you don`t have a physical space and time that is only shared by you and your partner.

Finally, it certainly does not mean that you don`t have the right to jealousy or that your feelings must be wholly disregarded. It`s just that we deal with jealousy privately.

Jealousy is not a license to us to control our partner, and we also realize such control is a false comfort. Cheating is alllllllways a danger, it doesn`t matter how much control you try to exert.

It is perfectly possible to have an open relationship without ever seeing your partner fuck someone else in front of you, if you don`t want to. Open relationships can take any boundaries the two partners settle on, much like vanilla ones.

Finally, you`ll lose your bet money many times to men who actually enjoy seeing their woman have fun with strangers.

 

First of all swinging and cheating are two totally different things and should not be lumped together! Cheating is about being selfish, dishonest and disrespectfull. Successful swingers are about honest communication, trust, respect and being secure. The first step to being in this lifestyle is open communication. The rules to make it work are the ones you and your partner decide on through this communication and can vary from one couple to the next.