I walked into my house to find my wife gone and a note nailed to the wall ."We have your wife ,if you want to see her alive we want £50,000.Do not contact the police ,we are very determined .Await a phone call . They weren't joking about being determined .ive had 36 missed calls from them now .
My uncle was a rubbish ventriloquist.... He used to sit me on his knee, stick three fingers up my arse, and get me to say nothing!