Questioning my sexuality...help please!

I'm sure there have been dozens of posts just like this so i apologize for sounding like a broken record, but i'm so confused and i just need some reassurance.

I'm 23 years old and have always questioned my sexuality. I've had several short-lived relationships with men and didn't lose my virginity until about a year ago. I've only had sex with one person, and that was just a handful of times. I didn't particularly enjoy it, and haven't attempted it with anyone else since then because i have absolutely no desire for it. I've wondered in the past few years if maybe i'm bisexual or a lesbian; maybe i lack the sexual desire for men because something is "missing" ie: a female.

This lack of desire has only gotten stronger in the past several months. I've had a boyfriend for almost two months now and we get along well as friends, but i cannot stand it when he touches me sexually or tries to passionately kiss me. It makes me cringe and i feel awful for constantly turning down his advances.

Recently i have been hanging out with a friend who happens to be a lesbian. My boyfriend does not mind me "innocently" making out with females and dismisses it as simple bi-curiosity. However, the more time i've spent with this woman, the more we realized that we have feelings for each other and we've both confessed this. I've been physically attracted to women for quite some time, but this is the first time that i've felt an emotional connection as well. I get butterflies when i see her and enjoy just cuddling her and being next to her. Everything just feels right.

I just...i don't know what's going on! Has this ever happened to you? I know most people just "know" that they're gay very early on in life, but perhaps i've been suppressing my feelings and true sexuality for some reason? Any reassurance or advice would be great. Thank you.

 

I understand the "cringe" feeling. I had that when I was with men too. It sounds to me like you need to cut the guy loose. You'll end up hurting him more the longer you stay with him. You should never feel like you want to crawl out of your own skin when your lover kisses you. Try being with a woman. And if you still aren't sure, try on another guy to see if it was just him that you felt uncomfortable with. Its never easy admitting that you might be gay/bi. Most lesbian women go through this feeling. Try it out. But definitely get out of the relationship you're in with the guy. If you cringe when he touches you then something isn't right. Good luck girlie!