Self-Forced PanSexuality?

I know it's generally told that homosexuality is not a choice but recently I've been thinking about how to force yourself to like other things in order to be able to enjoy life more, which brought me to the subject of sexuality. I'm personally atleast a slightly bit pansexual/bisexual and wanted to hear some other peoples thoughts on the possibility of changing your sexual preferences to enjoy the act of love making with more people.

 

You like what you like. No need to force yourself into anything.

Yet, you are 19, and still exploring your likes and dislikes alike.

Start considering your sexual orientation as something that is given, and most likely very immutable. Try as you may be, changing that won't really work.

This however, does not go on to say that all of us always act in accordance with our given orientations, and other features.

If you want to explore your bisexual, pansexual or any other sexual side of your personality, go for it. Stay safe and sane, and enjoy the ride.

No one has ever turned gay/str8/bi/pan because they tried. No matter how hard they tried.

KD

 

you can't force yourself to like or dislike anybody.

 

I find the term pansexual a bit of a wank.

You want to highlight the love side maybe it should be Panamorous, although that maybe sounds like the love you have for an airline

Pansexual just makes it sound like anything with a pulse sexual

That and it always just makes me think of Peter pan and tinkerbell

 

I firmly believe that no-one can choose their sexuality. You can defy your sexuality, but that isn't really the same thing...

 

Don't you think it's possible to effect your taste in other things like music? Would sexuality be different?

 

i don't know about you but i never chose to like Bruce Springsteen's or Kid Rock's music. i just do. damn, i even like some of Adam Lambert's stuff even though i detest what he does with his looks. i never chose to like condensed milk, or liqorice, or American muscle cars. but i do. and i can't explain why. and i can't make myself like anything at all. i either do or i don't. and i know that immediately.

i completely agree with Invisible Soul on this. it is not possible to choose sexuality. not one bit. no more than you can choose your personality or whether you prefer whiskey or beer or both or neither. the thing you're doing is buying into this whole 'be-open-to-everything' agenda some people seem to be promoting lately. you need a philosophy and that's what you've clung onto. but it's no more than that. a philosophy. you can force yourself do all kinds of things, and at the same time you can be in complete blissful denial on how fake it all is.

 

Like meridianwest said, I don't think you can force yourself to like anything. The most you can do, is put on an act, a facade, pretending to be something you're not. If you have to force yourself to "like" something, then you don't really like it at all, all you're doing is pretending.

You can try and defy aspects of yourself, be that sexuality, or other any other aspect of yourself, but then you're just a fake. Merely a charicature of yourself, rather than the real you.

 

All of the previous posters agree that no one really can choose their sexual orientation. You cannot choose what you happen to like, and equally so dislike. I fully agree with all of the above.

When it comes to sexuality, and a few other more complex issues in life, you may or may not really know how you feel about something you have never tried.

I have always felt that I was interested in other men. But I also found girls attractive, too. I gave it a try, AND I liked it a lot. I stayed actively bisexual for some ten years. If I had stuck with my first gut feeling, and denied myself the opportunity to explore and acquire taste in other things, I would have missed one of the best periods of my life.

KD

 

Try things. Have fun. Fuck the labels.

 

You can't force yourself to like more things or more people, but you can make a conscious choice to try new things and new people and experiment.

When you talk about this around gay people, you might get a negative reaction. Some of us have been compelled to go to therapists and other folk who try to force us not to be gay. To make a long and ugly story short, it doesn't usually work very well.

I've tried to make myself like different foods, kinds of music and TV shows and that just bored me and frustrated me.

Doing this with kinds of people and sex could be rough. How would you like to find out that someone had sex with you in order to make himself of herself enjoy having sex with the kind of person you are? And what if you found out the person didn't enjoy sex with you at all? Real people have real feelings and that makes things more complicated.

 

Just do what you feel like, you'll know at the time.