Wife is pregnant and family doesn't even know about our relationship how to tell?

Well my wife and I married last January. None of my family knows and neither did I plan for them to know. Reason why she's of like a different religious faith and I don't think they'd take too well to it... To me I think one can be a good person even if they don't believe in the same book or GOD. I love her the same and to me I know she's my other half and I don't feel I need to prove that to anyone. Love doesn't see religion to me. She is as religious as I am. She actually makes me a better christian in some ways she's never tried to convert me neither have I tried to I accept her as she is. She accepts me for me. I have loved every moment I spent with her and I would do anything for her and I want to spend my life with her. But the only thing is we recently found out we're expecting. She's only 4 weeks. We just moved on our own. My mom thinks I'm so young. Yet she got married at 16. So I don't see how we're too young for this. But I don't want to be speeched they don't even know I felt this way about her she was just a friend. But it's always been more than that. I don't know really though we're keeping the baby... So time's limited on how to tell family I see them often. I planned to tell them we were in a relationship this weekend but I didn't after finding this out....Advice???

 

Seriously, I'd tell them about your job before letting them know that you're married to their pregnant daughter.

There's no good way to give them this news, so lead with the job.

 

It's actually my parents that I'd need to tell. Her parents aren't even in this city...

 

Well , I guess you should have told them when she and you married . Since that ship has sailed , it's going to be harder now . In any event you are going to have to do it at some point . Your wife is the one you chose , it was never up to your parents to chose your mate . If her religion is not the same as yours so what . I'm assuming you're both christian of unlike denominations ? In any event you both believe in God , so what will their problem be ? Other than you kept it a secret for so long . At this point they have to deal with it as fact . And maybe since their Christian people , it won't be as big a deal as you thought . At least you're married . If you love her and she you and you're married , then they really have no choice but to accept it . It may of not been what they wanted , however it's up to you to chose your mate . To me what's really wrong is not telling them in the first place . Honesty would have been best .

Anyway congratulations on the baby . Now the fight will be which religion the baby should be brought up in . Life, does it ever get easy ?

 

Justakid1, it is evident you care very much about your family. Otherwise, you wouldn't be worrying about what they are going to think.

Since your biggest concern is your religions and this new baby, perhaps both of you could go together and talk to your respective preist/pastor/worship leader. If your faith(s) are as important as you say, having the church behind you is probably a good thing.

And if it's in your beliefs, get birth control after the baby is born especially if you're not in a good financial situation right now. It's costly enough to raise one child.

Congrats on your marriage and baby! Let us know how things work out.

 

no she's not a christian. But she believes in GOD. I don't really mind that she doesn't believe in Jesus. But she accepts him in a certain way. She isn't blasphemous about him she's just been raised differently.... She still has the same morals as I do. She has a subservient place she takes in comparison to GOD a view I've never had but seems beautiful. I think she's a good person. She doesn't talk against christianity I don't talk against her religion. It seems like Judaism in some ways. Well most of the time while we were friends I thought she was jewish. Until we kind of dated I guess. We've decided we'll teach our kids both religions and mostly enforce the moral background we both believe in... Many things about our religious perspectives have contrasts in a good way.

One thing about her she's not into worship leaders more into scripture. Which I like I mean GOD gave us the bible and as guide to live our lives. But I do like my church for the religious community it's always beetter the more like-minded people the better but I adhere to scripture really...

And thanks

 

its your life, your happiness, let them see how happy you are with your wife and they should be happy for you. good luck with it all and congratulations.

 

I can tell faith is important to you both . Or is it you're both concerned about what both sides parent's will think ?

Yeah, see here's you problem now . I'm assuming she is of some sort of Islamic faith, or a rosicurian branch ? And you're Christian, and your faith is important to you . And you say " I don't really mind that she doesn't believe in Jesus , but she accepts him in a certain way. " Yet you believe that salvation can only be through Christ as lord, right ?

How can you teach the child both these religions ? As they conflict . One believes GOD , manifested on earth in flesh through Christ , and the oter believes that Christ was a prophet and not God , I guess .

While you believe in the same GOD , the foundations are very different . It seems to me the child has to be raised in one or the other , if you wish to raise him or her in a religion .

Are you both steadfast and will stay in your perspective religions ?

 

I suggest maybe you can both keep your beliefs , and allow the child to chose when he or she is old enough to understand . And choose one or neither , when he or she is old enough to decide for themselves . Because teaching him or her both , will cause confusion .

Yet I don't think that's going to be an easy sell to Momma . But in time I imagine the excitment of the upcoming baby / grandchild will erase all that .

 

just don't tell your parents about her religion.

or, just don't see them for nine months and then get a sitter every time you visit them afterward.

 

Better yet: wait nine months then bring the kid to a family reunion .... and don't say a word.

 

To me I actually believe in different rodes to heaven. Like I mean they don't believe he just said different things. Essentially she is a follower of Jesus as well. Idk to me the foundation is actually similar it's just we believe different things about Jesus. To me I'd preffer my child to be christian and not a muslim but I think besides Jesus there's more to my faith. We both have similar morals and ideas. I praise GOD and so does she we just believe different stories... I think what we want is for our kids to have the same principles despite whatever religion they accept...

 

they know her she's not christian so it's hard to tell them because they'd know. They thought she was Jewish... Which would upset them either way Muslim or Jewish...

 

well we've talked it over and yea we're going to raise him/her both faiths with knowledge of both. Either way we want him very religious.


she's muslim actually. Not the cultural or social kind though...

My parents don't like it at all but I figured I got to be open about our family...

 

Not that it's my business but firstly how old are you? Secondly raising a child with 2 faiths is a mess waiting to happen. I understand the principles you want to give your child but honestly people being raised with multiple faiths won't happen. If you both honestly believe you're faiths are just as good then just pick one - you say yourself it doesn't matter, right?

 

Erm, no. I'm mixed race and I've been raised by parents with two very different faiths. Nothing has ever been confusing. It's enriching. Educate them in both if you want to, but let them grow up and make their own choices. That's how it was for me, and I respect all faiths. I wouldn't have it any other way.

 

tell them your wife was impregnated with gods second child.

not quite sure how it would help mind.

 

You want him to be very religious, and you have two different faiths. Ok. Whatever.
As for your parents, what business is it of theirs? It's expected. Boy meets girl, boy fucks girl, girl gets preggy....life goes on.

They expected something different?

 

wait until the baby is born and then go visit them and drop it all in their lap at the same time...the marriage ..the baby...the religion ...all at the same time

they wont know what to do..

like a deer in the headlights


but they will have to deal with it

edit>> (because its THEIR problem..dont make it yours..you have enough to worry about is what I mean)