I'll be honest, I am a straight guy ( as far as I know, anyway), though lately I have had fantasies of being with men, just to see what it would be like. I have never had much luck with with girls, and I am still a virgin. I just don't know if I am actually attracted to guys in some way, or if it's just because I need a release somewhere. It's not like I am a homophobe or something, I am just trying to figure out what kind of person I am. I really don't like feeling this way, or going back and forth, thinking about what people would say, if I told them I was gay, or even bi. I have just been screwed over and ignored by women so much, that maybe it's because I feel like maybe a man is the only person that would accept me. I am seriously just really bummed and really lonely, and i don't know what to do about this. I guess maybe the internet isn't the best place to find counsel about this, but I feel like I have to try at least. I am a very affectionate person, and I feel lost without somebody to shower affection on, and I just don't know what to do, and thought that maybe, as fellow humans, you folks might be able to help me understand myself a little better.
You're a regular, average person. Sexuality isn't black and white, stop trying to fit yourself into a label or a category and you'll stop being so confused, because you're confused because you're trying to do something that's impossible
I guess so, that makes me feel better. I am really used to being around a lot of homophobic people where I come from. (New Jersey isn't known for having the most tolerant of people.) and I guess maybe I can figure out if I really am bi or not, and admit that to myself, or maybe if I am just lonely, or what. I at least know for a fact that I am not fully gay, so maybe that is a step in the right direction.
Omg! I'm see myself here. I know what you mean. I was from a Muslim country and they don't tolerate any kind of sex at all even though I'm not Muslim! I was caught twice and sent to rehap twice! Anyway, few years ago I was here (other sites too) searching for answers and what I've learnt so far is that I'm sexually attracted to certain type of guys only but not romantically/emotionally (love) attracted to them. I find myself still fell in loving with girl. Like you I have little luck with girls and that droves me to think I'm a gay or a bi. Another factor I faced is I'm a "girly guy" physically which I can't help because I was born that way. But it took me a while to figure it out and nowadays, I accept what I am and happy I can love a woman and I can dress-up and be a woman and "entertain" guys that wanted to experience the "wild side" for a change. So my advise to you is to sort out your feelings 1st. Do you ever have a crush on guy or fell in love with one. Or just sexual attraction. Hope that helps
Wow. That really helps out a lot. I know that a lot of the women I am attracted to are older women, but you know, they're all married and whatever...and I am 22, and being a virgin at my age, among my peers, is kind of an embarrassment. I'm not very much a typical guy either. I was never very physically built, or athletic, and I spent most of my time with my nose in books, and the closest thing I have ever come to a sexual encounter with any girl involved a lot of alcohol, (which i would refuse anyway, because tha's not the kind of guy I am) but maybe these difficulties come more from low self- esteem than anything else. At least I am not the only one.
Hey Chitara: It may be easier to find a dude to have sex with than a girl, in view of this: I'm not very much a typical guy either. I was never very physically built, or athletic, and I spent most of my time with my nose in books Men tend to have sex for the sake of having sex, and are generally less prone to attaching any deeper meaning to it. Judging by your original post, you probably won't turn bi, gay or anything along these lines. You are, most likely, experiencing a perfectly normal drive towards the situational homosexuality. You would really want to have sex with a girl or mature woman. But you are not getting there for a host of reasons ranging from possibly being perceived as less attractive than the others to the lack of self-esteem. In the absence of willing partners of opposite sex, you are turning to the next best alternative: the partners of the same sex. You will soon realize that though you may lose your V-Card at the age of 22 and sigh out, saying "finally", the underlying problems will remain with you unless you really man up and grab the bull by the horns. You do not have to turn into Mr. Perfect Body. But you can work on your looks and general image to the point that you become attractive enough to have a decent sexual life for the guy of your age. Your bail out here via m2m sex is well, a bail out. You will probably get lucky, but you will soon realize that there is a very fierce competition on the gay fresh meat market, too, and unless you take serious action to improve your general image and attitude, you'd return to the daily frustration of getting rejected over and over again. Bottom line: hit a gym ASAP; get a good haircut, dress for the part, use the best skin care money can buy, and keep on going at it without a break. KD
