Monday will change my life forever

Wasn't exactly sure where to post this, but I am a woman and this is my issue....

I'm terrified of Monday. My husband and I will be going to court so he can adopt my son. On the one hand Im fairly certain we will win but I don't want to assume that, lose, and be devastated. This is by far the single most intense situation of my life. We've been waiting for over a year to do this and now the day is almost here.

Mostly Im worried about my ex showing up. Im not positive he will even show because he might have warrants out, but he is the last person I EVER want to see. I can guarantee if he did show, it would be to spite me, not because he cares (He hasn't seen or provided support for my son in over 2 years) Just by seeing him I start sweating, my blood pressure rises and I feel like my heart is pounding out of my chest. He did a real good job of making me feel worthless for 4 years and even though Ive just about gone back to my old self, I easily feel back in that same helpless position when I see him.

My husband and son deserve this so much...I just want everything to work out. We've done our homework on the matter, we have a really good lawyer and we quit smoking months ago. All our ducks are in a row now we have to put our fate in someone elses hands and Im terrified. Any suggestions on what to expect/how to behave/how to deal with my anxiety about seeing him?

 

Breathe deeply.. everything happens just the way that it is supposed to.

Expectations are the seeds to disappointment.

What does it mean.. your husband will try to adopt your son?
Is the child in your custody now?

If it means that your ex will no longer have rights to your child then it sounds reasonable that it will work out swell for you as he hasn't done anything in a couple of years for your child.
A lot of this sort of thing going on nowadays.

Remember to breathe and just be.. :daisy:

 

Good luck I hope it all goes well, without too much stress and that the right result is reached.

 

Barefoot, relaxe you are a good mother and I am sure you married the right man. You two have done everything right and your ex hasn't. The judge isn't stupid, he or she has done this a hundred times and they can see through the bull shit see and the truth. Go in there confident, don't lie, and tell them that the best intrest of your child is with you and your present husband and not the one who has showed no interest at all in him. Good luck ! We are all behind you here.

 

goodluck.hope all goes well for you all.:daisy:

 

I don't understand why either man would want to do that. The father giving up his own child and the husband wanting to take him.
But hey, good luck

 

Well, did things go your way

 

Thanks for all the support guys! Haven't been on in awhile.

Bio dad is contesting the adoption on grounds that he has been an active parent in my kids life...total BS and we can prove it. BUT, since he didn't lawyer up till 3 days before the hearing, court is adjourned until Nov 29th.

Keep sending them good vibes!

And jo, what don't you understand? My husband has been my sons father since he was 4 months old and now wants the legal right to have a say in his life. As of now, if I died my ex would have more say in what happens to my son than the man who knows everything about him.

But mostly, the reason why he wants to adopt him is because...HE LOVES HIM!!!! Why would a father who loves his son NOT want the legal right to have him in his life?

 

I cant say much without knowing the other side of the story (there is always 2 sides)

but hopefully you have a decent judge that does whats best for the kid

 

Like what's been pointed out, there are two sides to every story but from what I can tell you seem honest.

I hope the very best for you and your family

 

Thanks guys.

 

Hey Barefoot. I think that if this man has been the father of your son that the biological dad has never been than thats great! There may be two sides to a story but no one else in the world (and I dont care if anyone wants to beg to differ) than a mother who knows whats best for her child. So hope that things proceed succesfully so that your family is happy. Best of luck and once again, keep us posted