...i want opiates. i've done more than my fair share of them, i've been strongly dependent upon them, and had to kick cold turkey. i know how much it all sucks. most of that happened years ago, but i still want that temporary relief from anxiety and depression... not asking for help, just bitching about it.
You need to find something else that adequately alleviates your depression and anxiety. There are many options from meditation to psychotherapy to antidepressants to a combination of all of those.
The part that makes this "not fair" is that i understand.. i haven't had much luck with therapy or medication. 5-7.5mg of diazepam daily actually helped me function quite a lot, but that was "self prescribed". at this point, i wouldn't mind trying a new mood stabilizer, [seroquel and gabapentin both sucked], but despite the fact that i can drop clean urine when when tested i have a reason to, my current insurance provider's policy is to throw me in 21 day out patient rehab... hopefully things will get better in a while when i get to change insurance providers and see a private psychiatrist. the hardest part for me is actually setting up, and going to the appointments. ...my dentist has to prescribe me 40mg of diazepam to get me through the door :/
Good luck, I have been clean a while myself, I really know how you feel. All I can really do is play video games non stop and try to distract myself. I wish I could take some benzos myself but I just can't bare to, I feel like it would lead me to screwing up.
Im with you too. I moved from doing heroin (really good powder dope) and cocaine from NJ very frequently, it was effecting my life then when i moved to GA, i was cut off totally, ive managed to make a few connections here but, i want some dope. ha
LOVE it. And im not ashamed to say it. Heroin is a terribly addictive drug, but can have wonderful recreational purposes. Slamming a bag of some good D from Camden or Newark in NJ :love: But alas, fuck it, def better off without it. Addiction comes fast.. Thinking about going into ATL to get some boy tomorrow, just a thought...
Right? Isn't that what we all want? Happiness? But yeah^ I would love some east coast power right now. Wait I liveCamden and Philly. But seriously don't self-medicate to releive your problems. Thats what causes addictions and more problems. Go to the Dr. Your setting yourself up for a long and longely road by doing that.
I met live right oustide both. Typo. I went thru my dope phase and even thru all my years of opiate pill abuse I was able to keep it under control. But Heroin from the first time I tried it to within about 2 weeks I was on full blown fiend status. Robbing stores, stealing from my loved ones, anything by any means pretty much. That shit dragged me down QUICK. I was just kinda being a smartass when I said that honestly. But I'd rather stay with the pills because I know what I'm getting ya know? For some reason Heroin is just a serious weakness for me. But what I really just wanted to say to them is self-medicating is one of the worst things you can do. Just my opinion though.
Dope is only gonna make those issues worse. Sure for a little while, you wont feel anything but that dope, but when it wears off, you get double bitch slapped with that anxiety and depression. Trust me, I was knee deep in that east coast shit. Been clean for about ten days this time around, I been bitch slapped enough to know that, it aint worth it. Deal with your problems, you feel the way you do for a reason.
it's very important to be reminded that i do feel the way i do for a reason. p.s. i haven't seen you in a while pr0ne420!
5 - 7.5 mg of diazepam is a reasonable dose (that's valium, right?). You might actually have a chance of getting a legit scrip. I was taking wellbutrin for a couple months and it helped with my depression A LOT. I'm actually thinking about getting back on it because, like a lot of people, my shit gets much worse in the winter. Stay strong bro, just remember why you quit opiates in the first place.
man, just the other day i got into opiates with some pretty strong pills for a first timer (hydromorph contin) and it is the best feeling ive ever had, but is it really worth getting into it? ive seen some people go down the same road and never come back, and i just want to know if what im doing is a good idea from the perspective of someone whos been there before. ive always smoked weed and stuff like that, but it dosent seem to do the trick any more.
Stay away from opiates. It's a slippery road. 9 out of 10 people who try heroin graduate to IV use. I'm glad I don't shoot dope any more. It's not easy to quit, but I know I'm much better off without it. It only causes more problems, I don't care what anybody says, it doesn't make you any better. If you were in chronic pain and needed the medicine I understand, but otherwise, stay away. A junkies life is not very glamorous.
agree 100% with this. I got an OP 80 a few days ago...taking the last of it tonight and i am done for a long time with this stuff..i need a break. (been back on opiates for the past month) Yeah the first few times you feel amazing...but after that..it gets old..and fast..before you know it all your $$ is spent on this shit
well i know everyone obviosly says they will never let it get out of hand and all that, but i seriously hate needles, so i dont beleive i will be trying heroin ever. and i can see what your saying, i only started experimenting with opiates on tuesday... it is now friday and i have gotten high every day this week, including today. i think i might have to slow down for the weekend. but i really think it helps me be happy (and i do know, this is what everyone says for an excuse), or atleast it lets me be in my own little world for a while. because ive been very lonely lately... i switched schools to an individual learning center and i dont know anyone here, and ive come to notice all my old friends were fake, none of them ever talk to me anymore. life is just really kicking my ass right now and i need some way to get away from it...
