This isnt really a coming out story but more of something that happened but basically I slept with a girl that I really liked and she said she liked me too and it was great and finally confirmed that I really had a thing for girls. The only problem now is that I'm not sure what to do with her especially since I dont know if she wanted just sex or something more serious. We talked about it briefly and said we both needed time to think about it which is fair enough, but I feel that she isnt even making the effort to have a normal conversation with me now just as friends and Im starting to wonder if its even worth it or not because it seems like Im always the one having to make the effort to say hi, or maybe thats just her style? and also I dont want to seem to clingy but I just want to know where she stands Anyone who has been in this position or has any sort of advice would really be handy
I've been through a number of relationships and the biggest regret is always me feeling clingy and desperate. If you slept with her and she shows no extra "warmth" towards you I'd say that's a bad sign. In any case I feel like I've lost dignity in trying to make relationships come together when they were unsure the whole time.
I find it is usually best getting to know the person on a purely friendship level because people are a lot more open and honest that way vs if you go in with preconceptions and expectations. And sex just confuses things.
Love is a two-way street. If it is always you, who has to make an effort, you want to re-think your position here. People who are NOT sure about their feelings and plans usually need more time to think it over. Saying, "look, I need more time to think this over", rarely ever means that. It is usually a non-confrontational way of saying, "I am not up to it" or "I have got other plans." Try your best and then, rest your case. If she does not respond, move on. KD
