My wife and I have come to notice an issue that is hindering our sex life, and I'm looking to obtain advice on how to repair this issue and/or avoid it. Hopefully, someone can help! ____ We have a 15-month-old daughter, who was delivered naturally. When she was delivered, she tore me apart inside and I had to get 43 stitches in my vaginal area. Obviously, getting your vaginal walls sewn back together is going to tighten things back up. That's not a complaint from me at all. I've always naturally been that way. My issue is the fact that the stitching left me scarred. The scar isn't visually noticeable, but I can feel it, especially during sex. My wife, Kat, is definitely the dominant one in the bedroom department, and she's made that very clear that it's how she wants it to be. I have no complaints there. However, the internal scar that I have does cause a problem. We've recently started using a strap-on at times to elaborate our sexual experiences, and it does heighten the pleasure for me. The problem is, neither one of us exactly knows much of a different position possible other than missionary since we're using a strap-on, and missionary tends to cause me a lot of pain centralized on my scar (which is on my perineum). To answer pending questions, we do use plenty of lubricant. It does help, but doesn't cure the pain when it occurs. I have seen my doctor about the issue, and he said it's nothing to worry about. My question is: what other positions are there that the two of us should try? I'm flexible, I will be quite honest with you. We do want to expand our "position library", and hopefully find a position (or a few of them) that won't cause pain on my scarred area. Any ideas??? Please, help!
I have a similar issue. I don't have physical pain so much any more so time helps. My daughter is 12. I have issues with the sight of the scar and how it feels to her. She says she doesn't notice or care, but I feel inhibited if she's using her hands. She uses a strap on a lot and I love it. Try getting a desensitizing lube. Something with benzocain or lidocain. Anal Ease is a cream to cut down on pain there so maybe mix something like that in your lube. Good luck.
Try using positions that take pressure OFF the perinneal area: - Being on top, sitting, with your weight on your knees or lower legs. - Leaning on the bed or chair with your knees on the floor. Leaning on your arm will distribute the pressure off your bottom. - Your side, where you can squirm around to redistribute weight and really relax.
