I've lost a lot of friends through various reason. But I had one who I did care for alot more than anyone else. We were attacked by drunk asshole who tried to stab my best friend, who attacked us after I told him to fuck off for insulting us. My fighting instinct luckily got me to beat the knife off of him. Unfortunately he had a second knife and I asked my friend for help but he stood there like an idiot as I got stabbed a few times before I was able to throw the guy's knife away and knock him down. As we ran away, I couldn't but feel extremely betrayed by my best friend. Sadly today he my last friend and the only person who gives any kind of interest in me. Things are cool as we mostly do average mundane stuff as friends and even be in a close relationship But I just feel like I can't even trust or respect him. He can't even hold a job. I feel like a failure, the best I relationship I ever had was a gay one with some jobless loser who stood there and watch me get stabbed just after I defended him. Things has kind of gone downhill recently but I feel like he is all I'll ever get cause we're both the same level of crazy and screwed up and I just can't really relate to most people anymore. He's all I got but I resent him so I just kind of given up and try to get messed up enough to forget this most of the time. He tried to apologize but I just don't think he understands who betrayed I feel. I feel like telling him to forget me but I'm afraid of being completely alone. Anyways I'm not sure how to feel but suggestions would be cool.
I wasn't there so of course don't know exactly how the situation went....but some people respond very differently in those kind of situation. Like orison said he was most like in shock and maybe hadn't even realised fully what was going on. People who prefer to avoid conflict are much more likely to respond in that sort of way; is that his personality type? A while back we were jumped on b a group of 'youths' and my mates response was just to run away and leave me on my own! Yeah I was 'annoyed' a the time but now I realise that he probably panicked and it was just a natural instinct that he had no control over. If your mate doesn't have the same fighting instinct as you he wouldn't have had any unconscious clue as to what to do! I don't think you should feel betrayed, more just let down. I hope you work things out and get back to normal though.
Until those moments of danger, threat of violence and/or Death are upon us, no one can say for sure what they would do. Bravado is one thing, calculation another, though both are theories. Hindsight is too late, and coulda, woulda, shoulda taken from this perspective often allows more reflective analysis that can be blurred It is only what we do at the moment in question that define us, though the action or re-action is easy to make judgements on, the subconscious can take control. In my case, putting myself in harms way to challenge and disarm someone who had in their possession, discharged and was about to fire again without any kind of protection is not something I would advocate and encourage for death can be final, it was a reflex decision that saw a split second decision made. The point is shock, traumatic events affect people in different ways and it is not to say that the same thing will see the same outcome. I would (respectfully) suggest that a real heart to heart with the person; who said you clearly held dearly at one time may enlighten the matter, and may reveal demons that you did not know of. You were there, you know the person, it will be after all, your calculated response that will see the consequences. Genuine friendships are hard to find – is it worth a shot? Only you can decide on that – methinks – Good luck
the problem with choosing your friends solely on how they react to a crisis is that you either have to wait for a crisis to come up or create one yourself. both are impractical as means of choosing friends. i think the wrong friend is feeling betrayed.
