I am really just about as mad/hurt as a person could be at this point! I am 36 years old...knew i was gay my whole life..fought it i suppose. Anyways...i did not have my first encounter with a woman until i was 33. My Father passed away shortly after..and i had regretted not telling him...struggled with whether he would have accpeted me.."the real me". So..i knew i must atleast come out to my Mom..so i wouldn't have the same regrets. At first i thought she took it well...but i realize deep down..she's ashamed...and she keeps saying that i am going to hell. But..i just had an arguement with her..and she threatened to tell my whole family that i am gay. I really never felt i had a family anyways...it was just a privacy thing..i didn't want everyone to know. But...i will not have someone holding something over my head...so i called and told my Grandma..told her i am gay..don't care what you think..tell the whole family (as i know she will). So...now my Mom can fuck off and die...she doesn't have anything to hold over my head anymore...and she can be embarassed by everyone knowing...not me..because nobody in my family means a fuck to me!!! Curious if anyone has ever been through some shit like this...any advice..will be worthy. Sorry so angry..but i have a deep hatred for my family..especially my gay-bashing brother whom beat the shit out of me 2 months ago. I'm over the fact that i have no family. And..now i feel i don't have a Mother. That's hard to get over.
Aw hun, that's rough. No practical advice, because mt family accept me as i am and don't make an issue out of it. Big hug from me. :grouphug:
I know what it's like to be disowned by your family for simply being yourself and not who they want you to be. The thing you need to tell yourself, is if your family truly loved you, they would love you for you really are. If they don't, then they never really loved you in the first place and you're better off without them in your life. The bit about feeling like you have no mother... that is still hard for me to deal with I have to admit, and probably always will be. Nonetheless, you're still better off with no mother, than having one who doesn't really love you. Im really sorry to hear about your bad experiences with family, my heart goes out to you. I really thought that being gay, especially if you're female, was much more accepted these days. Situations like yours though just shows we have still have a long way to go before there is complete acceptance for all those with sexual orientations that aren't heterosexual... Big hug from me too. :grouphug:
I never got that from my family, dunno why. My little sister ratted me out a few years ago. My family is a strict German family still hell influenced my National Socialism. Once they found out I was ready to dig a bunker somewhere but they wanted to meet my girl and even accepted her into the family. I still cop the "how is you going to have babies" talk from my mum but.. I don't really think this world needs me to have kids.
