I am over being stressed - Looking for mentor

You really do nail it on the head. It is actually unnerving for me to let go, I was working at it yesterday, and it's like when I let go, I actually feel insecure. I have this feeling that if I let things go, that things will fall apart but as Reverend J says, I just have to go with the "Fuck it" mentality. Easier said then done and breaking old habits is hard. I need a 12-step program. Half joking and half not.

I really appreciate your post, because even if I have come to this realization myself before, it is the reminder from an outside source that reinforces the message and that is what I need right now, and probably will need for awhile. Reinforce the "Let Go" and "Fuck It" mentality.

I think I was like this from say 90-94, then from say 95-09, I got beaten down by various things. In 09, it all changed, but by then I had gotten into the habit of being a control freak, and too wrapped up in what everyone else was thinking. Now here I am from 09-present working to get out of that mentality. It's been a real struggle and I don't think the most fun for those closest to me but honestly, everyone that has posted here so far, has been tremendously encouraging, empathetic, and thoughtful.

 

As was your initial post, very succinct, honest, thoughtful.

 

Yes, work for pay is rarely satisfying but there are a couple of things you can control:

-Ignore the actions of others unless it effects your job
-Let others do their job
-find a visual that physically says fuck it, like miming the washing of hands, just wash away the troubles.
-leave work at work-it will be there when you get back-spend your spare time on yourself, family and friends

 

Great points. I am actually trying to avoid things that cause me "anxiety"/ stress. For example, I turned off my work email after I leave work. No more emails after I leave or the weekend.

I have also been consciously letting go, not letting certain people or thoughts get into my head. Putting myself into uncomfortable positions to "de-cling". I need to continue to force myself not to be there for everybody. I have been trying to visualize what I used to be like, when I always had a smile on my face, even when the shit was hitting the fan.

You guys have been great.

 

Worrying and Stressing out on things is a Killer - don't let it happen
> Positive Waves, Positve Waves

 

it's tough to change-stick with it

you have made the first step wanting to change

The saga in the work setting is just that, saga. It isn't part of the widget you make or the service you provide.

Walking meditation is helpful. Turn off the thought process periodically during your daily tasks (washing your hands, walking across the office, brushing your teeth)

 

Hi,
I went to a Budhist temple and did an introduction to Budhisim course which consisted of Tai Chi followed by meditation and then a talk about the Budhist philosophy.

Tai Chi calms the body, meditation calms the mind, Budhist philosophy can change the way you think. The good thing is that if you have other religious beliefs it won't conflict with those. It can help you get a handle on what is important in life.

 

I love his thread! I take the advice given to others