The wedding day

I have been married and now I am not. I was married young...it was love etc. I don't care to go into details of the marriage itself at the moment but mostly I wanted a conversation here about the structure and institution of the wedding and the marriage itself.

Much like other holidays there is a structure to our given celebration of the wedding day...that we as a societe fallow to almost as a rule, to bring in the marriage. There are small details we use to create our own celebration that represents the party to bring in the tides of the married life...however how many people are really original in their vows and celebration. This is a celebration of your life and love and you/ we use so many old traditions in this ceremony that have a history that means nothing about our love with the other person.

Most people I would say have had sex before their wedding day and so why do we do the whole white dress thing still??? An outdated thing if you ask me.

Then, once married we fall into our places and rolls in the structure of the relationship almost liek chapters fall into a book into order.

Why must we do this? Why must we decide to let others decide our celebratory structure and the rolls of our lives?

 

I'd say we follow customs to please the older generations. White dress makes the special lady stand out. I don't believe in marriage as a legal union. I still go for ceremonies though.

 

i agree with indydude... always go back to basics

 

the ceremony is fine...I just see so many people not religious marry in a church...or a virgin marry in white or...the same vows and same songs played...but it's not personal and it costs a lot of money to have this celebration....so why not make it your own?


one friend spends 40k on her wedding blowout and another goes to hawaii and celebrates with a shaman blessing for less.

 

A wedding is not only about the participants.
A marriage is not only about the couple.

A marriage is a PUBLIC statement that the two are a couple.
It is the community's recognition of their relationship to each other.

That the public (society) has a standard formal procedure for this public event is not surprising.

 

Weddings are among the most farsical of displays humans have ever put their effort into creating.

 

nice ^ Mike E

 

well obviously the tradition of the white dress signifying virginity has been abandoned. now it's just a white dress because that's what a wedding dress looks like.

 

We don't have to fall into a mold like everyone else. Society has told us that but your life and how you live it is up to you.

 

riff raff thats my point. but people just do shit brainlessly cuz its the thing to do...like "thats what a wedding dress looks like" yeah no shit..because thats what everyone does. mindlessly fallows like sheep.

 

sometimes it's tradition not mindless sheep

 

it's a fucking dress color. you don't have to wear white if you don't want to, most people enjoy the traditional wedding but if you need to hide your wedding behind some sort of political statement you're perfectly welcome to.

 

it has nothing to do with being political. its much like christmas...where it starts out a celebration of one thing and turns into something else over time just like a habit

 

As for wedding dresses, any detail looks best up against white or against accessories, lace, pearls, even diamonds. Lace in particular, any other colour and you'll end up looking like you are wearing lingerie

As for the institution itself, pretty much all of you get married whilst still having no real clue about guys, or other girls for that matter

 

what was your wedding like??

 

Your all missin the point. So many details to the looks of the dang party how does that represent your relationship at all? Could you get married in a t shirt and still be happy 29 years from now? The wedding is a show. The second wedding people are smarter they know it's not the show that matters

 

no one has an obligation to follow tradition

and remember people just want to feel special for a day - if that is accomplished by such means

why complaining about it??

 

The white wedding dress was a Victorian innovation which swept the planet.
Chineese used to be married in red and gold, now they have adopted the White gown.

It is a powerful physical statement.

Are the Fashionistias showing anything other than traditional white on the run-way?


:biggrinjester:

 

I think I get what you're trying to say applespark, but what about the couple that decides to follow tradition on their own accord and NOT spend 40k?

As long as the couple understands what marriage is for (publicly stating your love and commitment to one another) whats the big deal?

 

It's no big deal it's just a thought. Watching people be bridezilla makes me puke that's all. I don't care what people do I'm a people watcher..people make me think.do what you will. Love how you will.