People who say racist things but don't think they are being racist.

My best friend's husband is a racist idiot, but doesn't seem to realise it. For example when I had a Chinese boyfriend apparently I was going to marry Mr Ching Ching Huang Ning, and I have a Korean boyfriend now who I love very much and I got told that he can't tell the difference between my boyfriend 'and the rest of his Karate Kid friends'.
How do you deal with these kind of people? They are too dumb to realise they are being racist, they think they are being funny. There is the added awkwardness of him being my best friend's husband. I just can't tolerate any more stupid comments from him!

 

Poke them in the eye with chopstick...

 

If he thinks he is irritating you, he may keep it up. You could find somethings about him to "joke" about and give him a taste of his own medicine. You know, hold up a mirror for him, so to speak.

 

Sometimes, in life, its about lightening up and not caring what people say.

Some might say I'm racist, but I'm not...I'm real.

And remember...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9HRLvfbauA"]Being Offended - YouTube

Being offended gets you nowhere in life

 

“Pity the ignorant for they know not what they do”.
(Moreover, they will be stuck in a rut of uneducated mindset that they will always struggle to break free of)

 

Well wether you don't know your being racist or you do know your being racist you're still a ignorant person.

 

I've known people (one in particular) who claim to not be racist, and live a life that would make one think they couldn't be racist, who will rant for hours about how a certain race is evil and are the ones responsible for all the world's problems.

He also claims to think think that people should be free to believe in any god they want, or none at all, and then will go on for hours how a certain religion is so evil and corrupt that they are responsible for all the world's problems...

The best of it, is that if asked, he will be quite clear that he doesn't think his children should be held responsible for his actions, but he feels guilty about the actions of his ancestors...

People are people... what race we are, is just a random chance... Or, at least I don't remember being asked what race I wanted to be born into... do you? lol

As for what you do about those types of people? Don't talk to them if you don't like what they have to say and don't want to tell them so... Alternatively, you could tell them that they are being racist and explain why.

Of course, chances are, they aren't going to listen to reason, as if they were the type of person to do that, they would have reasoned it out for themselves long ago.

 

Fuck with him a bit. Tell him Asian guys have giant wangs, and tell him your friend should have an affair with an Asian guy so she'd be happier at home.

She'd cock better dinner, Mr. Wang would be happy...

A better deal for everyone.

Seriously, don't give value to the opinions of ignorant people by getting mad about it. Verbally acknowledge it as stupid, then change the subject.

If you get mad about it or argue, you're feeding attention getting behavior. I've learned this from racist family members.

 

As my wife would say I'm not racist I hate everybody equally. bad joke I know

 

Or, I don't care about color, as long as she can help me breed a superior race. :biggrin:

 

I didn't know I was slightly racist till last year when I was thinkin' about it. Now I'm trying to stop being racist, if that makes sense. I think it's cause where I grew up it was only white people so I'm just not used to other cultures n' such

 

Can someone please give me their own definition of what racism is really is,because to me it seems like the definition has change over the years. I can understand someone making a joke about about one's race, and it not to be taken seriously but mistaken to be racist.

 

Yeah--I can. "Don't ever bring that kid here again" said by my gramma when I brought a black friend home from school in the 1st grade. "Don't let your stepfather kiss you on the cheek-it'll leave a black mark"-said by my father regarding my Mexican step father. Blacks were known as coons around my place. I knew there was something wrong with them even in the 1st grade. My people ,on my grandmothers side "owned" human machinery in Missouri ,pre-civil war and the racism never left them. It was somewhat confusing to a little guy--I mean,they were my elders. Why would they say such things? I guess that's the start of what's known as institutionalized racism,when it's taught so early.

 

Yeah, because when you are a kid you don't really see color, you just see a little kid that you want to play with . Racism is either taught to you by your family members or you begin to adapt the racist mindset as you get older.

 

i used to be a racist because i was dumb little ignorant teenage shithead LOL....Id just ignore him, in his worlds its all good. Rememeber it comes down to worlds in that kind of thing. Perhaps try to understand the world he is in. If you dont wanna, kill the **** LOL just joking.

 

have you discussed this with your friend?

maybe you could ask your friend to speak to her husband and tell him you find his remarks unacceptable.

I know it's difficult, as the team I work with have hardcore racist views, which I mostly try to ignore.

 

duh... get his karate friends to kick his ass :mickey:

or just tell him he's being a jackass.

 

he may never learn. best thing you can do is try to love him anyway.

 

wtf.....in a bizzare, aqntithesis sort of backmasked way, that's so true.

Race with the superiror breed, and helpoed the co,lored man.

To the poster, these fuycvkers will goi to hell.

Dude, race is culoture, not humanaism, not politicism, not has a thing tkoi do with human charactyer. I'D GET AN ADVOCATE....FInd a good open minded person in some position of perseasion or coercion, and tell the idiot what's up...

GD LCK-PEACE

 

I have tried in the past when he has done other things (he's not just a racist, he's also a really rude, nasty person in both word and deed), but she won't hear a word against him, even if it's a lot of people telling her very similar stories.
I think since she won't listen we are all just hanging out for her to see what he is really like in her own time. Unfortunately it's almost impossible to see her without seeing him, because he comes with her to every social event (doesn't have many of his own friends to hang out - for obvious reasons). So it's a really shitty situation. I lose time with my friend if I can't bear to listen to her idiot husband's comments, and I won't stand for insulting of my boyfriend by a moron if I do have to see her and her hubby. Lose- lose.