I know some of you know my story and some don't but i am not hear to really get into that much detail about that. But i have been on official Sub maintenance since october. I had a 3 week relapse in december. I have not ingested any opiods other than subs into my body since then. I am now finally down to about 1 mg twice a day.... Ok now to get to the point. I really didn't start to feel my desire to use diminish all that much until recently. Of course it got a little better as each month went by but some days felt like the first day quitting. But i just feel like something happened this month...like a switch flipped in my brain or something. I just honestly have pretty much lost the desire to go back to that lifestyle and do that shit. I just thought i would share. BC i was on the fence for a really long time and i thought that soon as i was out of drug court this upcoming may that i would "DABBLE" in some opiates. But now its not even an option for me. Maybe its just a seven month thing and i will feel differently in august but for right now i feel more confident than ever to stay clean. I just wanted to say this for those struggling to stay "clean" if you consider subs clean. (that is a whole diff discussion). That if you wait it out I promise you will feel differently. Their reallly is some truth to time healing everything. It took my a year to get over my first love and that was just a girl, i knew oxy would take at least that long. SO all i am saying if you even have read this far is just try to wait it out because it will get easier.
