trying to read her signs and body language....

i want to kiss you.

good god, please ignore this advice. any less aggressive, and your dick will fall off. if this guy's right and she's not that into you, it's probably because you were too passive with your flirting, not the other way around.

 

:svengo:

 

Well, I'm a girl so I know what I'm talking about...

 

oh, no wonder you're advising him into the friend zone.

i'll never understand why girls always do this. never.

 

99% of women think that they are that other 1%; then, being egocentric, just as we all are; they get into the habit of thinking that most women are that 1%.

Actually, it's probably 99.999 and .001, but you feel me.

You wouldn't believe how common it is for the pinked-out sorority girls with fake nails to say they're just like a guy.

 

No, my advise is to leave her alone and start looking/searching for somebody else. Now he is just wasting his time on a girl who doesn't deserve his attention. He is a good guy, that's obvious but...

 

after everything he has done he deserves to get laid at least once! :O

 

I'm with ya!

Eh.. do you say so? Lol

 

well i agree on this advice, just not the reason you had stated for it.

 

Onk guys, i think it is over or pretty much close to over....

A brief disclaimer.... for this week end friday was perhaps the only day i could see this girl as saturday my cousin has a birthday and sunday i have to look after my friend who will be coming out of a operation.

As i said, this Wednesday i called her at 7 o clock, she doesnt respond, i dont leave a voice message. Fair eough i leave it at that, i dont want to be bothersome and keep ringing her.

The following day, i send her a txt at around lunch saying hey srry i missed u last night, i will try call you around 7ish tonight and we can discuss the week end? No response....
7 o clock arrives, i call, no answer, i should have left a voice message but what ever.....

Strangely 1 hour later she sends me a txt saying: "Hey sorry i missed your call, i was at the movies. Can we talk tomorrow? "

I didnt really know how to respond, and thought perhaps that really didnt need a response, it was self explanatory.

Anyway friday arrives. i call her at 11 am, this time i leave a voice message saying i want to take her out on a date, give her the details, and also say that there is no pressure for u to come if you cant make it, and sorry about the lack of notice, and told her about my busy week end.
I then send her a quick text, briefly outline the plan and told her i sent the txt as well because she might not have credit to check the voice mail....

Anyway, 7:30 rocks up, she does not arrive at the restaurant. So im pretty down in the dumps and look like a fool.

I call my friends and we go to a night club and have fun

So this is the wierd part..... on the long easter week end, i think a friday she sends me a text saying how how are you what is your week end like etc we send a lot of funny texts back and forward. She says she will contanct me during the week and cant wait for our next meeting.
Sunday i send her a text wishing her a happy easter, and also end it with hugs and kisses. She almost immediatly sends one back thanking me and ending the message with "xxx"....
So things are looking really good for me, i cant believe some one can change in a matter of days.

Also, im not sure if have mentioned it, but on the third date she said things like to me, that she trusts me, that she has found a nice italian man (as in me), that she wants to cook for me one day, that she wants to find a partner and companion etc - all strong signals that i unfortunately chickened out on and didnt kiss her. However i dont think me not kissinger her upset her too much, because he have been sending lots of texts back and forward for nearly 10 days....

It is so wierd but i think she probably just decided she wasnt interested in me, or found some one else during the out of town trip during the easter week end

 

I am not to sure how everything changed so fast. Sunday her last positive text was very good, and then she dissapears or acts uninterested....

I am very heart broken right now, yeah i know pretty pathetic after only 3 dates.....

This girl said some strong stuff on our third date... saying stuff like she wanted to come over and cook for me, and that she trusted me and was looking for a companion and partner..... and me being the dimwitted moron was too scared to kiss her..... im strongly thinking that was the thing that let me down. Perhaps i deserve this, but at the same time, i am human and humans make mistakes.

My friends took me out to a night club and get drunk and try to meet new girls, but every girl i talked to i had top bring up my situation, crazy i know....

I have to laugh, but i nearly made one girl cry one i told my story, all of them felt sympathetic for me, i dont know if that is a good thing or pathetic thing. What ever...
The majority of girls i talked to advised me to send the funny text i had planned, which would at the end ask if she is ok, whilst some others said i should be more direct and ask what is happening and what is wrong, a few even told me to ignore her and that i deserve better then this, i dunno......

Either way, i am a total mess, im not thinking strait. I wish i knew what i did wrong. Maybe im being childish and selfish but i feel its the least i deserve.

I feel totally destroyed, especially since i was getting so many good positive signs, and i feel like i messed up big time and that it is all my fault. But on the other hand i am so confused and not too sure where i went wrong.

Im a person who wears his heart on his sleeve, and some times it gets me into trouble or "exposes" me.... im thinking next time im not going to be myself and just be very mysterious....

I feel totally destroyed, i know i will eventually get over this, but man it is hard....... do you think it is over kill to delete this person from my facebook and mobile?

Should i contact this person in say 4 days time or a week, or just give up and move on? I can take rejection but after three good dates and a supposed connection, i really want to know where i went wrong or how i upset her. Would asking her that be too much?

Geez, some times i feel very angry towards this person, and i think, if they amazingly contact me again, i should either ignore them completely or worse reply with a smart alec comment like i dint want to know them any more.... i dunno im not thinking strait anymore....
Some of my friends even suggest that i should write up a email of what i am feeling and send it to her, but i am not going to do that. I dont want to appear angry or frustrated, i dont want to show weakness....

I dont understand, the last message on a thursday was ok, she said we would talk friday, then nothing.... so strange...

And finally i want to thank the posters that helped me though this, i know it is probably childish but thanks anyway.

I guess i got to find a way to get over this.

Cheers

 

heh, looking at some of these past posts make me laugh....

i was first told to slow down and cut down on the flirting and compliments, now i am being told that i didnt go hard enough.... lol

Maybe my signals of liking her strong, but i think the messages she showed to me on our last date were even stronger, and honestly shocked me a bit.

The whole companion/partner, cooking dinner for me, trusting me etc was good news, but kinda surprised me and put me off my feet. I think after the third date and when she said those things she really reeled me in.....

Like i said, i can take being rejected or her telling me she has a boyfriend or doesnt want to see me again, but the whole silence thing i cant stand. I dont know what i did wrong, that is if i did anything wrong to begin with???

 

Dude! You need to chill out. You sound like a girl. Women hate that. She has you dangling on a leash and you don't even know her. Stop analyzing every little detail. Find a way to get over what? You guys hung out a few times and you made it out to be some fantasy land romance novel bullshit. There was no relationship here. Nothing to get over.

 

She never confirmed that date and you went to the restaurant and waited for her? Why?

 

Actually, people had been right the first time to advise you not to go too fast...in my opinion anyway. Thing is, I think you need a simpler girl! LOL xD See, I personally think you're still being all caught up in the "sign reading" concept, and and at least to me, the girl somehow thinks it's funny to play you. From what you've told us so far, she DOES come across as someone who LOVES playing mind games. You don't want someone like that. Not when you think the way you do. I don't think the way you do, and I don't want people like that either myself, LOL. xD

I agree with Jharyn. You should chill.

 

Thanks for the input guys.

You are right I am over reacting. But you know what, that was Friday night when she ignored me and early Saturday morning when I had a hang over. I admit I was a bit down in the dumps.

Having a nice shower and going through a stroll through the shops and talking to other girls and hanging out with friends has kind cleared my head.

So I think I have gotten over being upset about her, not bad for a 1 day turn around lol But perhaps that means I don’t really like her that much, actually let me rephrase that, I like the face she showed me at our dates, im not liking the face she is showing now, perhaps her true face….

Im not upset anymore, but I am still confused. If I have some how hurt her or upset her I would like to know and apologies. If I have some how “blown it” then I want to know, sort of like feedback for the future. Basically I want closure and understanding of what is going on. I personally think there was moments of I guess you can say “passion”, but if I am wrong about that I can at least say for 100% that most of the time there was respect and friendship between us. That’s why I want to know if I hurt her or whats going on, and thats why i feel upset that this person just dissapears with out a explanation
But I have a feeling I will never know….

Im thinking that I am not nervous around her anymore now, I feel like a great weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I feel like if I get the chance to meet her again I feel like I don’t have any shame in asking her anything. Basically I don’t care if she doesn’t contact me anymore. It probably would be a good thing if she never contacts me as that way I know strait away were we stand.

I have this urge to send her the txt message that I mentioned earlier, that the females at the club all enjoyed and found very funny but sweet. But the urge to send is to find out were I stand with her. I am still confused on what is going on…..

So basically I have narrowed it down to 2 options:

Option 1: Don’t text or call her until she does, if ever

Option 2: Txt her the message that I created on Tuesday, 5 days since I called her. I believe 5 days is not to soon to look desperate or “clingy”, but it also gives me time to see if she responds first.

Who knows, maybe come Tuesday I might just loose interest all together and not send the text. But im thinking of sending the text, one final test. I think I honestly wont care if I don’t get a respond.

Im more strongly leaning to not even bothering texting her, I don’t want to look stupid in front of her or put her on a pedestal.

On a positive note, im still her “facebook friend”, maybe she waiting for more chances to toy with me lol

 

Btw, it may look like I am rambling, but when im faced with a tough situation in life I like to write down what I am feeling on paper or word, it helps me think clearer. Having this forum is a bonus as it allows other experienced people to criticize or applaud my thoughts

I don’t act like this when im around people don’t worry lol, im actually very laid back when with people

Hope you all don’t mind

 

Girls likes bad guys, that's how it works. Otherwise they get bored.

 

Why are you SO interested in this girl? What makes her SO special?
I don't get it...
Send her a message and if she doesn't respond leave her alone.

 

This is an example of "how not to relate to others,especially the opposite sex." I get the feeling there will be more stories like this over the next period of time with other girls. I hope not---------