i'm currently in a situation where i'm with a woman that i love and care for. we have a child together. years ago we used to have sex multiple times a day. after my son was born, we've had sporadic sex, like once a week, once every few weeks and sometimes month+ gaps. i seriously feel drained, depressed when i don't have it. yes, i know i have a problem. i watch porn from time to time but its really all the same and doesn't really do it for me. this has been going on for a few years now. sometimes she'll say, yes lets fuck later then when we get down to it, she'll say no - i didn't say exactly when. i've gotten to the point where i'm considering looking elsewhere. she's been telling me to find a fuck buddy but i know inside if there was one, this would be the end of the relationship.
Men and women both have needs, this includes sex. When she married you she vowed to take care or your needs. Partners have to make sacrifces for each other. Plus sex may be a great way for you two to reconnect/bond. She needs to put her ideas aside and take care of you. (However I would also ask if theres anything youre not doing for her, or could be doing for her....her needs need to be met too). that being said, try starting off with massages or wine or something...dont just jump into sex...make her feel sexy and want to do it too! that will make it better for you both rather than her just lying there and taking it Or maybe she needs a shock...surprise her one night by jumping on her and ripping her clothes off like an animal and just get down n dirty obviously theres a reason why she doesnt wantsex, and if that reason is that she's not "feeling it" then your job (if you choose to accept it) is to set the mood so that she IS into it Of course the other thing is that maybe she needs an ultimatum of some kind...or something to snap her back to reality..like telling her a hot coworker propositioned you or something and see her reaction...maybe if she truly thinks you will go off with a fuck buddy she'll change her mind and try sex....im not really into lying but sometimes ppl need to be put in a situation where they're forced to really see things... Anyways best of luck.. i suggest dont cheat, but maybe a break is in order if nothing else works
I don't know all the details, but it sounds as though the relationship is on its way there anyways, if not there already.
it seems a lot of people think sex is the main key in a relastionship. which it isnt. there could be a reason to why she dont want to do it, having kids and pretty much kill ur sex drive all by its self. i dont think i agree that coz she married u, she vowed to take care of ur needs, hell thats selfish other wise, but anywho, is sex more importent then loving ur wife and being a good understanding husband? talk to her, see if there is any underlaying problems, it could be something simple that can be sorted out if u both compromise with each other. if there is more to it, like she just dont feel horny any more, then u need to think of getting some help with that maybe
what would be the use having a relationship and getting a fuck buddy? Because of the kids? Plenty of people all over the world have kids with someone and aren't together...its the latest trend in western society...its the "divorce fad"
Sure beats staying together and making the other miserable. Have you ever seen a couple who don't really like each other fight in front of their child(ren)? It's best for all to call it quits when things get that bad.
