gay/ts/straight confused

Hey all, guess I felt I needed a place to dish...I'm usually on a straight forum in my area and don't want to reveal my whole gay/ts side to a bunch of homophobes. This site seems cool so I thought I'd give it a whirl. I should say I was inspired by this really hot porno with a guy with a huge dick banging a cute chick (and wishing I was her-I'm a guy by the way).

It's been a while for me since I've had a gay lover because I've been quite busy with life. I also realized I'd love to become a TS but I'm a bit older (30s) and it is a long and very difficult process from what I've seen and that's what largely is holding me back-also I'd have to cut off relations with friends/family and that would be very difficult if not impossible.

At the same time I also love women so I'm really mixed up. In sum, a part of me craves being with a man again (gay relationship), another part wants to transition and become a mtf-TS and yet I'd also want to be 'straight' and date women. I wish I had the clarity that those who are definitely gay, trans or straight-but I'm in the middle.

Well I could scratch the gay thing because as a TS, I'd be with men primarily so I guess I want to transition and don't. Wish it was something easy to do. I know someone might suggest I get with a ts but not really into them...I mean I wouldn't reject a hot ts if I came across her, but I'm primarily attracted either to men or women. I'd prefer to be a ts myself, it'd be nice if one could magically switch between genders based on mood, but that's a fantasy.

Anyways I just felt the need to confess these inners thoughts to random strangers. lol None of my friends know, except the ones who are gay. Feel free to say whatever you like, I'm just thinking out loud mostly.

 

First off, sexuality =/= gender.

Second off, I'm too drunk to make a detailed response right now, but again, gender =/= sexuality.

 

well only you know how you sre with the TS thing - but otherwise you simply sound bisexual.

Bisexual - the best of both worlds and a lover of human beings.

Good luck,

Simon :sunny:

 

u can liek both its perfectly alright some times u can have both at the same time

 

I'm aware and I too was a bit drunk when I wrote that.

 

Thanks, you're right, I'm definitely bi-sexual but would like to become a transsexual-but there's many obstacles to overcome that are holding me back.

 

true, but I just hate that I am pulled in different directions. When I was a kid I thought I just liked girls and that was easy to deal with.

Then I realized I liked guys too (for their bodies mostly), then it dawned on me I probably should've been born a girl. lol

Perhaps its that I love life and want to explore all aspects of it.

 

Well I’m not a doctor or anything but I feel that transitioning to the opposite gender is a really big deal and u can’t go back once uve done it. So if that’s where u feel u are headed then u should really do as much research as u possibly can on that subject. Also it might not be a bad idea to talk to someone like a professional I am not saying u are like crazy or anything just that it seems like u have a lot on ur mind and it might do u good to unburden yourself to someone who could provide some real advice.

 

I've done a lot of research on it already but I would've gone ahead with transitioning if my life was more settled than it is right now.

Don't worry about giving me any bad advice-speak freely, I don't make major decisions in my life based on what someone might've said on a forum. lol As for seeing a professional, I probably know more about it than they do...I'm confused but in a good way.

I'm fortunate that the desire to transition is not an existential juggernaut that will drive me to suicide if I don't (like it does for some people who feel they're in the wrong body). I'd like to transition but if I don't, I'll only be disappointed but will continue to enjoy life.

 

lol well thats good

 

:2thumbsup::2thumbsup::2thumbsup:

 

i think, no offense, because it seems as though you've only just decided to be a woman, it would likely be a poor decision to become one. transsexual people, at least i assume, know they should be the other sex from the get go.

there's nothing wrong with feeling as though you want to exhibit your female side, many gay men do, but they don't go as far as to become women. enjoy your sexuality, and continue to enjoy life as you do already - remember becoming a woman is irreversible and you may not like what you eventually become.

 

I was just going to say the same thing.
Every trans I know, has known their true gender from a very young age.
My own GID was apparent as a kid, even though I'm not dysphoric to the point were it's caused me any anguish. My inner King has always been there.

GID isn't always black and white. Explore the spectrum.

 

I totally agree. The OP also states "wanting to be a transsexual". People who actually are transsexual do not have a desire to be transsexual, they feel they are the opposite sex to the one assigned to them at birth. And people who feel like that, and take steps to unify their mind and body are labelled transsexuals. But they do not desire to be transsexual. It is also true that transsexuals usually feel in the wrong body from a very early age, and experience deep depression and anxiety due to those feelings. This doesn't seem to be the case with the OP.

My advice would be to not transition. The OP seems to have some transgender feelings, but I dont think they are transsexual.

 

I kind of get what you are saying OP. I am bi, usually like women more, but at the same time have often feel I would enjoy my life more if I was a women. The grass is always greener remember. I agree with above that you should not transition. TS individuals are usually pretty sure, studies have looked to see the rate of people who transition and then regret it later, and the numbers are almost 0 last time I checked. What statistics like that tell me (and should tell you) is that because I am not sure, I should not do it. If a time comes in my life when I know its what I want, then I would do it. Right now though it is not an option I am considering at all, because there is to much about being who I am that I love.

 

how about you? are you a ts or just curious about them?

 

I don't have time to reply to everyone but thank you all for your thoughtful posts, some good advice all around.

 

No I just major in psychology and in my sex and culture class we have been talking about transgendered peoples .