Patterns of Failure

I seem to have this problem of attracting the wrong kind of guy. After my last relationship that failed miserably (a year and a half with a commitment phobic) I re-evaluated what kind of people I was falling for. So I decided to give one of my friends who's liked me for a while a try. It's only been three weeks and the pattern's repeating again. He told me about a week ago that he has a tendency to run away from happiness and I told him I've exhausted my ability to deal with that. His phone's broken which may account for a certain amount of communication problems but it still feels like I'm starting down that old familiar road. My instinct right now is to cut him loose but I also don't want to jump to any conclusions. I'm so tired of all this bullshit, I just want to be happy and maybe happy means alone for me. Anyways I want to give him a chance to explain but I don't know how to bring things up. Any ideas?

 

I'm also concerned that my past relationships and what he said about running away may have blown certain events out of proportion in my perspective.

 

You may be too needy and insecure.Kinda sounds like it. I suggest you work on your own life to the exclusion of others for enough time to be able to stand alone and love it. You will then be able to see your postion in life more clearly,and realize you are valuable and do not have to worry about such things.

 

You don't need to confront him on anything and assume that everyone follows the same relationship guidelines. What you should do is tell him what you want, tell him you like to have daily contact. He cant know what you want unless you tell him.

This is probably the case.

 

you're female. you're doomed to date every sadistic douchebag you meet, and nothing can be done to change this.

 

this is kind of my stock answer, but you might want to see a relationship councilor unilaterally, to try to figure out how much of the problem is coming from you and your patterns.

How much do you like this guy? More than the last bf?

 

No.

Normal people don't open relationships with statements like that.

 

I'm a commitment-phobe. Give him space if he says he needs it...trust me, your relationship will work if you know when to step back and when to get close. Being commitment-phobic is pretty common, so good luck finding someone that isn't at least slightly commitment-phobic