social anxiety....

That kind of sounds like me..the people i'm friends with at college I know I wouldn't really be friends with them if I could act like myself around people. Its such a struggle to think of what to say to them and I can't stand it.

 

Booze loosens me right up. Too much and youre an ass but just enough and youll make a lot of friends. Man I give terrible advice but I used to have this same problem. Just dont end up a piss drunk at 22. I made a mistake but at the same time i dont regret it.

 

Thanks yeah i feel so much more relaxed and more like myself when I drink but it just depresses me the morning after so I usually stay away from drink!

 

I do. And I feel the same way about adhd and everyone I've ever met that's been diagnosed as autistic

You have to learn to live with yourself, no amount of therapy can ever "fix" anyone

Hell, even who is and who isn't mentally retarded is subjective

 

So true. You just gotta come to terms with it and try to deal as best you can and learn from experiences. Or drink a lot of alcohol, or both =]

 

oh god, i can't drink =(

 

I can't smoke pot =[ Makes it a lot worse.

 

I got like this pretty bad when my mother died, then time went on and I started to realize things. I'm still like this, but I have made friends, new hobbies, and I am starting to come back out of that shell again. Maybe that's what you need.. keep trying!

 

Your right it's not. When I was younger I used to think I was super shy, until I got into middle school. Then I just felt very nervous around anyone who I wasn't super close to. I have a very hard time starting conversations with everyone, when I go out I feel as if everyone is staring at me and it makes my nervousness even worse. It also doesn't help that I have super bright red hair. On top of all of that I have communication problems. But I have found that times cures all. Since moving to Miami I have come out of my shell just a little. Hang in there things will get better.

 

Booze used to do that for me, but lately I find I'm still quite socially reserved and paranoid even when quite drunk. It still helps somewhat though.

 

I know it sucks so bad. I wish I could function socially without alcohol but I can't.

 

Your never going to get over your social anxiety properly in any way other then if you make attempts to dispel it. Try talking to people, try going out to a group or club meeting just to be there. You do not have to be the life of the party instantly everywhere you go. I had the same problem going to university, just try not to make everything more then it actually is. A conversation is just a conversation, it is not much more. If need be, take baby steps, start saying hi to people in the hall or class when you sit beside them, even if you have no intention of talking more then that, or thank you's and your welcomes more frequently. It is polite, and starts making your mind more used to casual interaction with strangers.

 

That's a good point.

 

1. Drugs are bad for anxiety. don't believe me fine keep smoking it is your brain you can do what you want.

2. Socialize: Just like it takes time to get good at a sport. so does socializing. also if you do not play the sport often you might lose your skill over time and have to practice again. same with socializing. you gotta keep your social skills from getting rusty. socialize often with many people and you will get good at it.

3. Exercise: it helps relax the mind and increase mental focus. to many people fail to realize how helpful exercising really is. you only improve over time and it only gets easier. it takes time and effort but you gotta start at some point and keep to it.

4. Reading: Reading fiction books rather than watching movies really helps stimulate the brain. If there are movies you like then there are books you like too. reading is boring is not excuse unless you hate every movie on the planet.

5. Pornography and masturbation: I am not sure if you do these things but lots of people do. Not doing these things will increase your mental energy and not masturbating will increase your physical energy and allow you to have more motivation to exercise and increase your social confidence. if you do masturbate and watch porno and do not believe this will help then seriously go 2 months without it. you will then see what I am talking about.


If you seriously want to improve yourself then follow this guide. try it out for 60 days at least.


also try to find people with the same interest as you. if you like art find people to do art related things with. video games then find people to play video games with. sports then find people to play them with.

 

i usually find myself looking at people and i get the impression they are uncomfortable. we all get like that.

just remind yourself, each time you get a little nervous, it's all in your head. i mean, any money says you have made somebody else feel, through your awkwardness, that perhaps they are at fault

it's never crossed your mind i bet. that's because we are all narcissistic to the point of not realising. whatever you worry about, without a sign planted neatly on your forehead - i doubt people will catch on to it.

 

I know how you feel about having social problems. I do too. Best thing to do is get to know who you are. There should be no fear in unique personality. Inside myself I have a lot of creative ideas, but can't get them out. Have you ever tried group meditaion? Take care brother. I'm joe

 

I usually stay in a circle of close friends unless I'm drinking, then I'm down to go out and meet new people and do things like go see bands, even dance. If I don't have my "liquid confidence" or "40 oz of social skills" I feel very uncomfortable. I feel like everyone's staring at me or like I'm inferior or disliked. Even though this may not be true the feeling is impossible to shake. Or I'll get nervous and just freeze up and not know what to say. And then feel stupid which is another blow to my self esteem. It sucks fuckin' dick. Rugor: I don't smoke pot because being high makes it way worse. Ecstasy, however, made something click into place in my brain. When I'm on it my personality just shines, everyone's told me. I'm not used to that and it was kind of a shocker but it was like I'd been that way all my life.