Is sex a need or a want?

Whether something is a "need" depends on what you need it *for*. To drive a nail, I need a hammer. I don't just want a hammer; if I don't have a hammer, I can't drive a nail.

To stay alive, I need air, food, and drink. To stay mentally healthy, I need sleep. I suppose I could survive for a long time without sleep, but it messes up the mind to go too long without sleep.

To feel emotionally fulfilled, I need love, and physical touch. I can be alive and mentally healthy (more or less) without love or touch, but I'll feel deprived and not fulfilled. To feel sexually fulfilled, I need sex. I can live without it, and even feel emotionally fulfilled without it, but without sex, I'll feel sexually deprived.

So yes, it's a need. And also, I want it.

 

This is from my dictionary

Fulfillment is:

'1 satisfaction or happiness as a result of fully developing one's abilities or character'

or,

'2 the achievement of something desired, promised, or predicted'

People are confusing fulfillment and need. Sex is not a need by any means.

 

Exactly. I am emotionally unfulfilled. Because Ive never had any intimate contact with anyone, and have never been loved. But it is not a need, as I have been able to survive without it, and I'll have to continue surviving without it. I definitely feel deprived, and feel a sense of loss, and have a void inside me. Does it hurt? Absolutely, but Im still surviving and living without those things in my life. You may need sex to feel in some way fulfilled, but you certainly dont need it for survival. You can live without it.

In a way, Ive been forced to live without these things, but yet Im still alive. If I was forced to live without food or water though, I wouldnt last very long. Sex and love are things that can certainly enhance life, but neither are necessities for it.

 

Sex is a need. It's a want too, but we need it to stay alive. It's what our bodies are built for and those sexual desires don't come from nowhere. We need it before we've even tried it. It's not like alcohol, where you have to hear about how good it is or have a tiny taste. Sexual feelings are already there.

Sexual needs fall within physiological needs. Stop breathing and you'll die in minutes. Stop drinking and you'll die in days. Stop eating and you'll die in weeks. You're not exactly going to drop dead if you stop having sex (well...) but it is needed to stay alive.

Sex is something our bodies naturally want and benefit from. Like oxygen, food and water.

And I think you should get that sports car

 

My mere existance is proof that statement is a total falsehood.

 

Lack of sleep will kill you. Your body can't work without it. You feel the repercussions after missing even one night. You'd be dead within a month.

Forget aboout emotional fulfillment. You can have sex in a loving relationship. If you're not in a loving relationship and are only engaging in one night stands then you're doing so because you want/need sex.

 

On second thought, it's probably a need

after all, think of all the sex i'd get... :auto:

 

I won't say that there aren't exceptions! I have read some of your posts dotted around these boards.

Not that I'm a stalker or anything! :blush5:

 

I'm not going to sit here and say sex isn't a need just because I'm not having sex at this point in my life. But I do insist doing it or not is in no way a portrayal of someone's worth of character. A lot of people would say masturbation is necessary, and that is sexual release. No that is not necessarily needed for surivival, but a lot of us have natural urges, and hell look at the result in the male of not releasing his fluid....blue balls. Promiscuity is a choice, but people falling in love is not necessarily. In that situation the natural urge is unified and fueled by a transcedental mental realm of passion and affection, at that point the sexual experience is transformed in to something so much more that it is not even what it was once thought as. Even in such case, sex is a not a need.

 

But you might as well be dead,

 

Good coz I fink I need a lift somewheres.. :drool5:

 

Haha. I'd certainly be losing my favourite pastime

 

I'm with you on this one.

 

I think depending on age and sex drive that you may want sex so bad that in your mind it becomes a need. How many times have you heard "If I don't get laid soon I'm going to lose my mind"

 

My situation is quite unique, and Im aware of that fact. The fact Ive never shared an intimate moment with anyone is something which is partly through my own choice, and partly enforced on me by things beyond my control. Im certainly an exception rather than the rule, but Im certainly proof that you can survive without intimate, emotional contact with another person. I wont pretend its a situation Im thrilled to be in, but its certainly not a basic human need like water or food. You may be unhappy and unfulfilled if you were forced to live without it, (which I am) but you could certainly survive, which I am proof of.

 

You can definitely survive without it! Though do you never have sexual desires?

 

I guess it depends what you mean by that. I think I wouldn't be human if I hadnt thought about sex, and what it's like. Especially the length of time Ive been forced to live without it. But due to the operation carried out on me when I was very young, I cannot feel sexual sensation like most other people can. So its a feeling I can only imagine. But yes, I have wondered what sex is like. lol

Though Ive only ever fantasised about sex in the context of a loving relationship, and its the lack of that, and never feeling loved, which hurts me most of all, and leaves me feeling empty. But I guess sex (or making love) is tied in with all that, so it is part of it, although its not the thing I feel Im missing out most on. As a woman, I do feel very inadequate through being completely undesireable and unattractive. In a way I feel more like a thing, than a human. So while I certainly dont need any of those things to survive, I do feel very incomplete as a person, and especially as a woman, through never experiencing those things.

 

For me:
Sex, as well as Love = Both a Want and a Need
And - Both, are what makes the World go around

 

If you can survive without it, then it isn't a need. Water and oxygen are needs as we would die without them, sex is a want.

 

If we're talking about what you need to survive, you are correct. It's all about choice. If you want to die, you don't even need air or water or food. But if you choose to live, you do need those things.

If I choose to drive a nail, I need a hammer, even though I can survive without driving a nail. I need sex to be fulfilled even though I don't need to be fulfilled in order to survive. That is, the common meaning of "need" has to do with what you need something for. The word is not limited to what we need to survive, but encompasses what we need for other things.

That is, in common usage, we talk about what we need to achieve our objectives. If your only objective is to stay alive, you don't need much. If your objective is to write an email, you need access to a computer with an internet connection.

Almost everyone has, as an objective, to be happy. Some people do not feel happy if they are sexually unfulfilled. Others are perfectly happy being celibate. For the first group, it is a need in order to fulfill the objective of being happy. For the second group, it is not. For some, it is not even a want. But telling folks they don't need sex is like telling someone who wants to use a car for transportation that they don't need to put gas in it. Sure, they'll survive if they run out of gas, but that won't fulfill their objectives.