How to Respond

Wife & I have done the backdoor maybe 10-20 times in last 10 years. I can't "read" her. She usually finds excuses not to, but frequently orgasms from it when she does do it. Among her excuses are, (a) she gets gas and pressure, (b) it messes up her bowels, (c) we'll get disease (both monogamous over 20 years) so I have to wear a condom if we do. One time she got a yeast infection in her pussy which she blamed on me (supposedly my dick touched her pussy). Most of these strike me as crappy excuses but hard to outright say you are wrong or lying! And it doesn't even make sense given that she also orgasms from anal! The best I can say is that most of the time if I ask for it, I get a BJ instead. Nice, but not quite the same. If I had to point to something, I'd say it is that our "usual" sex life is so good, as she almost always orgasms and that is a sure thing and anal isn't. We are still doing the deed several times a week. Suggestions?

 

Find somebody who can serve you well when you crave for something else than a BJ.

Don't really understand my fellow females why they refuse their men.

I love anal! (and ATM)

 

She doesn't like it.
Accept that she knows what to give you for your birthday and have fun doing things that you both enjoy the other 364.

 

My wife does not care for anal but occasionally lets me do it. She has never had an orgasm from anal and said she simply gets no pleasure from it. But she does enjoy having her ass played with and licked.

I prefer to just enjoy the great sex that we have and not worry that she does not really enjoy anal.

 

she doesnt like anal...it wont fucking kill you to forget all about it in an effort to respect your wife and let her keep her dignity...its just a hole

 

Your advice is piss poor. What fellow females? I don't associate myself with you. His wife is a gem for trying it. She clearly doesn't like it.

You love anal (and ATM- which is rank, actually) so congratulations. Now, just because you like it, it's every woman's duty to do so with her man? If I came across a guy with the same attitude as yours I'd break his face.

 

To each his own. I like to submit, never refused anything to any of my partners, or sex to anybody who asked nicely. Life is to enjoy!

 

Exactly! You don't seem to understand this motto though.

 

Well, who is to say that if one partner wants something, and the other doesn't, then the first one has to acquiesce?

Do you like anal, dollyfizz?

 

She's tried it. She doesn't like it. We don't force people to do things they don't want to. If we did then rape would be okay.

Not sure why we're being personal here but I'll answer your question;

Haven't a clue if I like it. Never tried it. But I probably would try it, and if I don't like it then I'll not be doing it again. He'd either be decent enough to accept that or he could jog on.

Anal isn't the be all and end all. There's plenty of other stuff to be getting down and dirty about.

 

I respect your view and views.

The reason I suggested him to look for alternatives is because I believe that's the better outcome, at least in the long term. Sexual frustration isn't something to be dealt with easily. And if you think in larger numbers, both of them might be better off - she could find somebody who's not interested in anal.

Long time ago, before trying it, I was also scared about anal. Perhaps I was lucky, but a guy has taught me everything I needed to start liking it. OK, perhaps it's not always a pleasure (swallowing isn't always a joy, some semen tastes bad regardless how much we try to sugarcoat - but then good oral sex always involves swallowing).

But knowing how much joy it produces to the male behind me - it's totally worth it. I would never refuse anal, never have. Probably that's why a good number of my former friends and colleagues come see me (us, in fact) when traveling and in town.

Sex is one of the greatest joys in life and hence should happen as often as possible.

 

Vaginal.

 

get her sloppy drunk?

 

Has the OP reciprocated?

Whenever I;ve been hassled for it, I just say...you first, and if you like it....then I'll give it a try...now....find me a cucumber.

 

You don't give up on a marriage and someone you love because they don't want to partake in anal sex. You accept it. Suggesting he dumps his wife for someone new is ridiculous.

Good oral sex always involves swallowing?! You have sooo much to learn! Good oral sex does not always involve swallowing. You have to mix it up. Have him finish in different ways.

That's because you like it. It's fine to be as open about anal as you are, but people don't share your tastes. Personally if someone thought they could drop by for a quick (anal) shag on passing by, I'd be mortified. Sex is best when both people really want it.

Easily one of the greatest joys in life. Not sure what you mean by the second part though. It should happen as often as you and all people involved are comfortable and want it to. That's all.

 

I thought marriage was supposed to be all about trust and honesty and communication and all that crap


Still, you saying you want to tell her that her reasons for not being into anal are wrong? Seriously, listen to yourself...and your reaction if she wanted to shove things up your butt all the time?

 

Well, she's worth keeping and I am a faithful man. I guess it just kind of irks me that we always end up having to do things the way she wants which strikes me as a little one-sided.

 

Maybe I will pipe in here. As a male I have never had anal sex. AND I really don't want it. I've wondered about it but usually in the act i feel totally satisfied with vaginal sex. I've NEVER had a woman as me for anal sex so my general impression is that most women don't really like it. Gee...I can understand why. It just doesn't seem to be a body part made for that! Just my opinion...

 

Time to split up and find another girl who loves it in the ass. No point to stay if she won't be an anal whore.

 

Wait, so you are suggesting that the man must accommodate his wife's needs, that if she doesn't like anal he should put up with it? Instead of tolerance, wouldn't it be better for both parties to just split up and find partners who agree in their sexual desires?