it was the night before thankgiving , tsa style..

Twas the night before thanksgiving when all through the airport.
Some people were tall ,and some people were short.
A lady in stockings, high heels and fine hair.
Its the holidays season, what do I care?..

I stand there waiting, crazy thoughts in my head.
Maybe I should fly to Texas instead.
What do you know another delay,
I suppose tonight the floor I stay.

When out the boarding gate there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from from the floor to see what was the matter.
Away police officers ran by like a flash,
Some said "omg is a terrorist i think hes wearing a mask"

The beer I drank in the lounge musta had me going.
Because I see a naked man and his balls are showing.
What to my wondering eyes should appear,
But an erect penis. .. I though "Oh dear"

This little old man, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St Dick
More rapid than eagles curse words out his mouth they came.
He shouted and shouted, "this is shame.

Now listen you bastards, come look at me all,
you wanted to see my gun and my balls"
From the top his lungs, he shouted away.
People just stared at him, what more could they say.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard a snap
The hand on a tazer, hes about to get zapped.
They drew their arms and aimed with their guns
Hitting St Dickolas right in the bum.

His eyes-how they twinkled! his dimples a glow!
Just when you thought it was the end of the show.
He drooled from the mouth and pulled out the wires.
He jumped in the air and then jumped higher.

He jumped on the counter grinning his teeth,
Spitting out profanity to everyone beneath.
He had a broad face and a little round belly,
He shook his penis, like a bowlful of jelly!

It wasnt much longer they shot him again,
this is when all the magic begins.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
took the lady in stockings, gave his penis a jerk.
I thought for a minute quickly "how rude"..
then I thought again, well "right on dude"

The cops sprang on him, with all their might
hauling him off holding him tight..

But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere they drove him out of sight,

"FUCK YOU TSA , and to all a good-night!"

 

An instant classic.

 

Did you write that? It's actually very good! Haha.

 

thanks

yes, my neck is hurting now, leaning over so long, I didnt realize it was that long and I tried to run as much as I could , took a few short cuts.

word and phrase suggestions welcome..

 

:rofl::hurray: that was emotional...

 

thanks.. :sunny:

 

that was really good

 

I'm Really Quite Impressed, I Was Always Of The Opinion The The Closest

You Ever Came To Culture, Was Finding The Six Month Old Yogurt In

The Far Back Corner Of Your Fridge....



Cheers Glen.

 

That's good man. Send it to Hallmark.

 

Even this asshole seems to like it!



Who was this Guy again?

:cheers2:

 

hey , I like nat king cole..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cubgWvBfs24"]YouTube - Nat King Cole - The Christmas Song

 

Cole was a gentleman. Don't y'all be confusing him with that other guy.




.

 

Orison I just got to reading that and it gave me a great giggle.

Very well done, sir.

 

My husband and I were cracking up over this. Good job.

 

very impressive Ori. i liked how you mentioned the bitch in the stockings with fine hair at the beginning and then bringing her back into the story....that kinda pulled the piece really tight. good job you mad hatter you.

 

thanks everyone.
I tried to rep everyone for appreciation ,but keep getting the 24hr notice.. Ill get back to you if I havent..

 

You didn't rep me yet. I'm still at 31 points.